1 West Ham – Liverpool 2

With City and Chelsea picking up wins earlier today, I certainly hoped we would do too. Wasn’t as easy though…

It’s good to have Alisson back between the sticks, as I wouldn’t fancy our chances with Adrian playing against his old club. He didn’t have much to work with, and the only conceded goal was not his fault.

Match number 100 in LFC for Trent Alexander-Arnold. I remember when he was shaking like crazy in a derby against United a couple of years ago, and he has come a long way from there. This season isn’t Trent’s best work, at least so far. I’m staying loyal to TAA even in Fantasy, where he’s still the most expensive defensive asset that doesn’t return shit. HODLing him may not have been my best idea.

Nat Philips had to be called upon as a centre back, since we have an epidemic of injuries lately. He’s not a spring chicken by any means, and I honestly don’t remeber much from him in the EFL cup, but he has gained some fans today. I think he never lost a battle in the air, which is nice when you have Joe as your partner. He didn’t make any mistakes, and all in all, he had a solid enough game. To be more specific, he had 82% passing accuracy on 96 touches, 6 recoveries, 2 interceptions, and 3 duels won. Not bad for a start, but it’s also a case of expectations set low.

Gomez however disappointed once more. You know, it’s scary to admit that he is the only healthy first team centre back, because his level of play is bad. While I can’t blame only him for the first goal, his poor clearance was something to shake your head to. He’s ball watching a lot, he’s bad in the air, and there’s not enough defensive players around him to hide his weaknesses. You know why I am so hard on Joe?

No team in the league has conceded more goals since the restart than Liverpool.

I wish I was kidding. While it sucks to lose Virgil for a season, this stat clearly shows that our problems have been around for a long time, and we need to buy a new CB this winter, of premium quality too, to make Joe less complacent. Speaking of Virg, he had a successful surgery and is in good spirits. Rest easy, big lad. I miss his long switches of the ball from deep to catch opponents off guard with. Now we don’t have that move in our playbook, and such deliveries are not as effective, since teams have time to cover their ground now.

Robbo was great for my liking, making some huge blocks and interceptions. He had a good chance to score on the volley, and ran back and forth like he usually does. From the first 11 players he perhaps had the best start of the season, certainly true if we limit it only to defenders.

Hendo played all 90 minutes, and his long passes were largely ineffective. He can launch a sweet counterattack, but for that you need an opponent high up the pitch, not parked deep like West Ham tonight. He worked hard and made that dirty work nobody cares about, yet the midfield overall was slow to regroup when losing possession.

Gini Wijnaldum is… frustrating. Take a sip of water every time he passes the ball forward and you will die of dehydration. Little creativity in the build up and not enough energy when tracking back, just sideways passes to guarantee that 80%+ possession. Ok, it’s also harsh, he had that cool looking flick in the build up for the decisive goal, but he still needs to be more aggressive with the ball.

Curtis Jones did ok in my book, and I think I won’t be far off when I will say that he was the most creative player in midfield from deep before Shaq. That’s kinda sad too, since he’s just a youngster, although with a bright future. Not a lot of credit was given to him for finding Mo with a pass that led to a penalty, people concentrated more on his defensive lapse when we conceded. To cut him some slack, he’s not the type of player to expect some mature positioning, he’s more comfortable with the ball at his feet driving forward. He roamed around a lot, and I liked him the best going forward.

Onto the holy trinity… Firmino, I like him, but man, he needs to sit out a couple of matches. Bobby has peaked two seasons ago, and I hate to say it, but his place in the starting 11 is not warranted now. Surely he’s still a very talented man, but he has been out of form for a good year now, and needs to do more. He’s like Gomez, you can cherry pick stats and make it seem like he’s either atrocious or amazing, but the truth is somewhere in the middle…

Mane didn’t have the best game, his touches were a bit heavy, but still, when we attacked down the left flank, he was sharp as always. He was taken down in the first half to no penalty, and tried until the very end. That disallowed goal where Sadio allegedly fouled someone is pure BS IMO.

Mo is his typical self. He will always have his one or two chances to score, and tonight he had more thanks to a penalty. To be frank, execution was iffy, but a goal is a goal. I captained him in my fantasy, so I am happy he didn’t blank at home once more. He has also been a bit egotistical, but that comes with his role.

Now onto the dessert. Jota is on fire, and he needs to start against City, certainly against Atalanta. He’s so direct, smart and hard-working that you really shouldn’t be surprised he has started so well. 40 million? What a bargain. He saved our bacon once more, and I hope he’s not viewed only as a supersub, as he has a lot more to offer. He has breathed some fresh air into our offence. With a trio of Jota-Mane-Salah you don’t have a clear cut facilitator, and if you think about it, it’s not such a bad thing, since it makes the attacks more unpredictable.

Also big props to Powercube Shaq for his secksy through ball to Diogo. He has been very useful this season, and it’s a good thing that he didn’t leave in the summer. He still has something to offer when our efforts are stifled.

To summarize, let’s make a list.

Firmino has to sit out a couple of matches in favor of Diogo.
Under impression that Nat Phillips will get a MOTM award.
Could have been more comfortable if Mo shared the ball near the end.
Keita-type player needed in midfield for those cut through passes. Shaq has been good lately, maybe he needs to change his position?

Visiting City would be tough, but it’a not like they are on fire or anything. Today they beat Sheffield United through a Walker banger only.
Another three points on the board is the most important thing.
Rest a bit and go on again, it’s going to be a long season. YNWA.

0 Chelsea – Liverpool 2 (Keepers Matter)

First big opponent of the season for Liverpool, excluding Arsenal!

Chelsea had a very busy summer and bought some real killers: Havertz, Werner, Ziyech… they have also invested in defence, picking up Thiago Silva and Ben Chilwell. A week before this match Liverpool fans would probably be envious of this transfer activity, but Papa Edwards nuked the end of this week with two huge signings in Thiago and Jota.

Thiago was the best man on the pitch in the Champions League final, and Diogo is a top impact sub player according to EPL statistics. New boys did not get the nod, and the first XI was fairly predictable, if we don’t count in Joe Gomez’s omission.

Apparently Joe got a knock, and all Klopp had left to do was stick Fabinho as a centre back. Fab certainly has the height and length to do some good job, but with Lovren leaving and Matip nursing an old injury, we have to get a new face in until the window is closed. Ki Jana Hoever, one of the most promising young players left for Wolves, so I have little doubts that Kloppo has one more player up his sleeve.

Anyway, the first half did not give both sides a lot of chances. Timo Werner, the man that was rumored to join the Reds, got some cutting runs, but largely was neutralized by our makeshift CB. Fab did a marvelous job, and it’s a worry, because Jurgen might think that he’s so good we don’t need another centre back.

Of all people, Kante drove the ball forward the most. Wonderkid Kai is only getting his feet wet in the new leg, and Turbo Timo looked to exploit the space, yet didn’t get a lot of passes.. Not a lot of threats from Blues in the first, and the best moment belonged to Liverpool. Kepa was being his usual self, rushing out of the goal and completely losing control over his net. If it wasn’t for Christensen’s timely block, Firmino could have made it 1-0 in the first half.

While Christensen did well to deny LFC a goal then, he got a little careless after Mane was unleashed after a beautiful long range delivery by Captain Hendo! Danish lad grabbed him with both hands and took it to the ground, getting a red card. The official had to look at the monitor for a bit to overturn the initial yellow card… Trent’s shot is off target, and that’s the first half. I had a feeling we would get much better.

Thiago started the second half, subbing Hendo no less! Tomori on for Havertz, a rough start for the german prodigy so far, he will need more time to adapt in the new culture. But hey, that’s his problem.

I’m a Liverpool supporter, and I only care for my team. The second half started under total control of the Reds, and our magical trio of Bobby-Mo-Sadio combined to get the lead. Great chi from Firmino, and Mane gets a free header. A couple minutes later Mane catches Kepa with the ball and slots in his second, once again proving how shocking “the world’s most expensive goalie” is.

By that time the game was pretty much decided. Thiago got some touches and man, when he gels with the rest of the squad, we’re going to see some serious tiki taka going around. Flashes of brilliance were evident here, and a little blemish on Thiago’s record was a foul in the box on Timo. He earned another penalty, which was successfully thrown away by Jorginho. Awful penalty, but Alisson did well to parry it to James Milner. By the way, how bad is your team leadership-wise if Jorginho is rocking the armband?

Alisson showed how important a great keeper is, and saved the clean sheet for the champs. Salah was chasing a goal, but wasn’t that lucky today. At the very end Gini missed a 3-0 from close range, but it was hard for him to readjust himself.

All in all, this was a great performance. Fab did a fab job as a centre back, Thiago walked in right into the thick of things, and Mane proved his FPL doubters wrong. I enjoyed the portion of the match when Liverpool just rolled the ball around without getting pressured by the londoners. One of my favorite moments involved Robbo leaving Jorginho dead on the floor with his sharp turn. I laughed out loud, and that’s a shoot, brother.

Three points on the board, and we have started our third season in a row with 6 points.

4 Liverpool – Leeds 3 (Instant Classic)

Well this was a thriller and then some! I expected Leeds to give our defence trouble, but I couldn’t see us shipping three goals in our opening fixture.

The Premier League champions against Championship league winners, it looked promising when the fixture ist became public, but honestly, this gung ho battle was not on the cards, even though both Kloppo and Bielsa are total football maniacs.

I liked how we started, with Naby lad driving into the box to create an early chance. So glad to see him thriving in the starting eleven and finally blossoming into the layer we paid big money for all these years ago. The first goal didn’t take long, as Mo Salah got a pen for shooting it straight into Koch’s hand. He confidently converts the penalty after his signature long run up.

We have a flying start, controlling the ball amazingly. Helder Costa scores from offside, but overall, the early minutes looked very promising until Leeds decided to show why they got promoted. Trent lost his flank completely, and Harrison cut inside to score a beauty of a goal, leaving all our defenders powerless to stop the equalizer.

Sadio tries to right all the wrongs, but overthinks it and misses a good chance. He scores from distance after some good pressure from Robbo, but this goal is also ruled out for offside. Don’t sweat it though, because Big Virg easily puts us back in front with a powerful header! The keeper caught the ball, but only behind the line. Very fun start, it’s an end to end game, and soon enough it’s level once again! Uncharacteristically bad play from Van Dijk, who got robbed by Patrick Bamford. He had some similar mistakes last season, hopefully that’s not a trend the Dutchman will follow.

This wild ride keeps swinging back and forth, and Salah gets his second with a super volley into the top bins! 3-2, and the match timer goes backwards. Shit’s insane… Bielsa once said they study their opponents to attack, and not defend, and that couldn’t be any closer to the absolute truth. Leeds are fun, but they won’t have many clean sheets this season if they keep such a high line. Speaking of defence, Leeds just highlighted the issues that were lingering the Reds for some time now.

Second half gets a bit more steady, but there is this worrisome moment from Trent where he scores in his own goal after Alisson is chipped. I don’t know what that was, but I’m glad nothing resulted from this bizarre moment. Keita is off at 59th minute, and Rodrigo steps in for Leeds. Hendo off on 65th, Curtis Jones, the promising youngsters gets a lot of minutes tonight. After some changes on the field, the scoreline also changes to 3-3. Klich runs into the box late and scores a good goal, celebrating and laughing so much that he gets subbed. Well, maybe I imagined that. Mo almost gets a hatty, but skiles a volley…

Vrg scores his second, but it is ruled out for some stupid foul. I was getting anxious, but I also felt that this match had one more crazy moment in it, and that was the right idea, as Fabinho got slammed in the box by the record transfer Rodrigo. A debut to forget for the spanish forward, and it’s Mo Salah who takes the ball and seeks to give us our forth lead… GOAL! Hat-trick in the first gameweek, not too Xabi Alonso.

Trent had his worst game ever probably, but Salah entered God mode today and pulled off a miracle. This was some heavy metal football, and I found a lot of respect for the opponents. It wouldn’t be the case if we drew with them though! Bielsa is a character, and this league needs guys like him to be even better. First three points, and a crazy bout to boot. Let’s go!

Man of the Match is of course Mohamed Salah.

Community Shield Struggles

I haven’t posted for a while about Liverpool, which is very strange considering my favorite football club has won their first league title in 30 years.

It was a special moment that happened under special circumstances, but I was so burnt out waiting for the restart that all I could be thinking was “Thank God it wasn’t voided”. Plus the end of the season felt very odd, and I wasn’t paying much attention to the actual level of play, just wanting that season to be over.

The results were not the best at the end, but now it’s a clean slate. First game comes early, against Arsenal, who made a habit out of grabbing FA cups lately. Interesting test after just two friendly matches. A thrashing of Jurgen’s favorite club Stuttgart and a comeback draw against semi-finalists RB Leipzig.

What else to say before the match? I like Arsenal’s white kit, it looks stylish. What I don’t like is Mo Salah’s new haircut. Doesn’t look as gangsta is it did before, why did you trim those sides, Mo?

The lineups are nothing special. Trent has a knock, Hendo, Matip and Xherdan (sure he is) are still injured. Some people say Divock has that virus, hopefully that’s just some speculations. Keita doesn’t get a start despite having a kickass end of a season and some good friendly matches. One the bench we have some lad named Billy Koumetio. He’s 17 years old and 195 cm long, sheesh… Leaped other youngsters for the 4th centre back choice by the looks of things, but I doubt that he will get minutes tonight.

Would like to see the Championship sensation Rhian Brewster get a run out, the boy is good. (This aged like milk!)

The game started with a quick goal from Big Virg, although the score stayed 0-0 because van Dijk was offside. He has a busted eyebrow after a collision in the last friendly match, RB was playing dirty there. Arsenal has changed their philosophy quite a bit and are playing with a new low block formation for some time, which makes it tougher to break them up and gives them a lot of space for counter attacks.

One such attack broke out quicker than COVID, Saka switched the ball to the right flank where Aubameyang capitalized on Neco’s positional mistake. A good shot – a good goal, can’t blame Alisson there. Auba payed homage to Mr. Black Panther.

Neco played a bid first half, looking short of breath on the flank. Lots of free space between him and Joe, playing a high line with them and without Hendo is super risky. On the other side of the pitch Saka created 3 or 4 good chances for his partners, I wonder if he will be put on the bench with Willian’s arrival. That would be a shame…

Not much has happened in the first half, with Robertson, Milner and Mane having most of the ball. Constant crosses do not work here, and the set piece threat is not as evident without our wonderboy Double A.

Felt like checking the comment in half time, and people call for Thiago ASAP, underlining how invisible Gini has been in the first 45 minutes. I agree, but we have Naby lad on the bench right now. Later in the second half he subs Millie and yes, creates a lot of chances driving right at the defence. He changed the game, stepping on the pitch with Taki Minamino, who went on to score his first goal in the official match for LFC.

I hope it gives him some much needed confidence, and this is a sign of things to come. There was a question of handball, but VAR decided there was none.

Arsenal started playing more in the last fifteen minutes, giving LFC more room to breathe, but it all went down to pens. Rhian was brought in for Gini with one minute left, shame James did not play until the end to score one. Well, this sub wasn’t for nothing.

Rhain missed the third pen, and was the only one to not score in the series. Alisson didn’t get close to any of the shots, and that was it. Aubameyang brings the Community Shield to Arteta, congratulations to the Gunners.

Not a good result, and you would think LFC would have enough quality to beat this Arsenal side, no disrespect. Last year we also missed out on this prize, but the season turned out great at the end.

Lucha Underground Match Ratings and Notes

So I have decided to rewatch Lucha Underground – my favorite thing in wrestling in the last decade.

To make something out of it, I am going to rate every match and add little comments about the segments. I’m doing it to prepare for a TEW 2020 diary, but if this will be enjoyable for anyone other than me – that’s cool. Grades are generated in my brain, so you may disagree. This is not a bias-free review writing either, I have my favorites and some wrestling pet peeves.

This page will be updated regularly (I hope so), and hopefully will become something of a match guide.

Match Ratings

Prince Puma def. Johnny Mundo – All Night Long Match (97/100) S01E32
Mil Muertes (w/Catrina) def. Prince Puma – Lucha Underground Title Match (96/100) S01E39
Fenix def. Mil Muertes – Grave Consequences Match (94/100) S01E19
Pentagon Jr. defeats Fenix and Ivelisse and Johnny Mundo and King Cuerno and Taya – Lucha Underground Title #1 Contendership Six Way Elimination Match (93/100) S02E21
Rey Mysterio Jr. defeats Prince Puma (92/100) S02E26
Prince Puma wins Aztec Warfare I (91/100) S01E09
Pentagon Jr. def. Vampiro – Cero Miedo Match (90/100) S01E39
Killshot def. Marty “The Moth” Martinez – Weapons of Mass Destruction Match (90/100) S03E02
Cage def. Mundo – Aztec Medallion Steel Cage Match (90/100) S02E14
Matanza Cueto wins Aztec Warfare II (90/100) S02E09
Mil Muertes (w/Catrina) (c) defeats Pentagon Jr. and Prince Puma – Lucha Underground Title Three Way Match (90/100) S02E07
Fenix defeats Mil Muertes (w/Catrina) (c) – Lucha Underground Title Match (89/100) S02E08
The Mack defeats Cage – Falls Count Anywhere Match (89/100) S02E24
Prince Puma def. Fenix (89/100) S01E10
Cage def. The Mack – Falls Count Anywhere Match (88/100) S01E38
The Monster Matanza Cueto (w/Dario Cueto) (c) defeats Cage – Lucha Underground Title Match (88/100) S02E19
Fenix def. Cage, Sexy Star, Pentagon, Killshot, Mack, Cuerno – Aztec Medallion match (88/100) S01E27
Prince Puma defeats Mil Muertes w/Catrina (87/100) – S03E07
Rey Mysterio Jr. defeats Pentagon Dark (87/100) S03E01
Aerostar, Drago & Fenix defeat The Worldwide Underground (Jack Evans, Johnny Mundo & PJ Black) (c) – Lucha Underground Trios Title Match (87/100) S02E26
Dragon Azteca Jr., Prince Puma & Rey Mysterio Jr. def. Ivelisse & Son Of Havoc (c) and Cortez Castro, Joey Ryan & Mr. Cisco and Fenix, Jack Evans & PJ Black – Lucha Underground Trios Title Trios Tournament Final Four Way Elimination Match (87/100) S02E14
Fenix def. Pentagon Jr. (87/100) S01E04
Johnny Mundo def. Prince Puma (86/100) S01E01
Son Of Havoc defeats Texano – Bar Fight (86/100) S02E24
Sexy Star def. Mariposa – No Mas match for Aztec Medallion (85/100) S02E15
Matanza def. Prince Puma – Lucha Underground Title match (85/100) S03E05
Fenix wins a 10-way (85/100) S01E08
Fenix, Ivelisse, Johnny Mundo, King Cuerno, Pentagon Jr. & Taya defeat Prince Puma, Rey Mysterio Jr., Sexy Star, Son Of Havoc, Texano & The Mack (85/100) S02E20
Dragon Azteca Jr., Prince Puma & Rey Mysterio Jr. defeat Cage, Johnny Mundo & Taya – Trios Tournament First Round Match (85/100) S02E12
The Monster Matanza Cueto (w/Dario Cueto) (c) defeats Pentagon Dark – Lucha Underground Title Match (84/100) S02E26
Mil Muertes def. Fenix – Death Match (84/100) S01E29
Prince Puma defeats Dragon Azteca Jr. (w/Rey Mysterio Jr.) (84/100) S02E23
King Cuerno defeats Fenix (c) – Gift Of The Gods Title Match (84/100) S02E01
Johnny Mundo def. King Cuerno – Cage Match (83/100) S01E18
Aerostar & Drago defeat Jack Evans & PJ Black – Nunchuck Tag Team Match (83/100) S02E20
Fenix defeats Aero Star and Bengala and Big Ryck and Jack Evans and King Cuerno and Sexy Star – Gift Of The Gods Title Seven Way Match (83/100) S01E39
Worldwide Underground def. Fenix, Drago, Aerostar, Sexy Star – Atomicos Match (83/100) S03E04
Cage def. Johnny Mundo (83/100) S01E13
Drago def. Fenix and Aerostar (83/100) – S03E07
Johnny Mundo defeats Alberto El Patron (82/100) S01E39
Mil Muertes (w/Catrina) defeats King Cuerno – Death Match (82/100) S02E25
Fenix defeats King Cuerno – Last Luchador Standing Match (81/100) S02E03
Alberto El Patron def. Johnny Mundo (81/100) S01E26
Pentagon Dark def. Rey Mysterio Jr and Chavo Guerrero Jr (81/100) S03E06
Prince Puma def. Hernandez (81/100) S01E29
Cage def. Texano – Best of 5 Series Match #2 (80/100) S03E05
Prince Puma defeats Pentagon Jr. (80/100) S02E04
Son of Havoc, Ivelisse, Angelico def. Texano, Cage, Cuerno and Ryck, Mack, Killshot + The Crew (80/100) S01E24
Puma def. Cage – Street Fight (79/100) S01E20
Fenix defeats King Cuerno (c) – Gift Of The Gods Title Ladder Match (79/100)
Aerostar defeats Drago – Aztec Medallion Match (79/100) S02E13
Sexy Star defeats Daga and El Siniestro de la Muerte and Killshot and Marty Martinez and Night Claw and The Mariposa – Gift Of The Gods Title Seven Way Elimination Match (79/100) S02E25
Johnny Mundo def. Angelico (79/100) S01E21
King Cuerno and Cage def. Prince Puma and Hernandez (79/100) S01E26
Ivelisse defeats Angelico and Son Of Havoc – Lucha Underground Title #1 Contendership Three Way Match (79/100) S02E01
Aerostar def. Jack Evans (78/100) S01E27
Johnny Mundo defeats Cage (77/100) S02E05
Matanza Cueto def. Mil Muertes – Graver Consequences Lucha Underground Championship match (77/100) S02E16
Cage defeats Taya (77/100) – Mixed No Disqualification Match S02E07
King Cuerno, Cage and Texano def. Prince Puma, Johnny Mundo and Hernandez (77/100) S01E23
Johnny Mundo def. Prince Puma and Big Ryck – Ladder Match (76/100) S01E07
Johnny Mundo (w/Taya) defeats Fenix (76/100) S02E23
Texano def. Cage – Best Of Five Series Match #3 (76/100) S03E08
Fenix, Jack Evans & PJ Black defeat The Disciples Of Death (Barrio Negro, El Siniestro de la Muerte & Trece) (w/Catrina) – Trios Tournament First Round Match (76/100) S02E13
Mil Muertes def. Son of Havoc (76/100) S01E35
Johnny Mundo def. Son of Havoc (76/100) S01E14
The Monster Matanza Cueto (w/Dario Cueto) (c) vs. Mil Muertes (w/Catrina) – Lucha Underground Title Match (75/100) S02E13
King Cuerno drew with Johnny Mundo following a double count out (75/100) S01E16
Drago def. Aerostar (75/100) S01E23
Aerostar def. Drago (75/100) S01E19
Angelico, Ivelisse and Son of Havoc def. The Crew – Ladder match (74/100) S01E28
Fenix def. Pentagon Jr. and Drago (74/100) S01E03
Jack Evans, Johnny Mundo & PJ Black (w/Taya) defeat Dragon Azteca Jr., Prince Puma & Rey Mysterio Jr. (c) – Lucha Underground Trios Title Match (74/100) S02E18
Johnny Mundo def. Sexy Star – Gift Of The Gods Title Match (74/100) S03E08
Drago def. Cuerno, Hernadez, Cage (74/100) S01E31
Prince Puma def. Drago – Puma’s Title vs. Drago’s Career (73/100) S01E25
Son of Havoc def. Angelico (73/100) S01E20
King Cuerno defeats Killshot (73/100) S02E05
Drago, Aerostar, Fenix def. Taya, Jack Evans, PJ Black – Lucha Underground trios title match (73/100) S03E03
Fenix def. Killshot (73/100) S01E25
Johnny Mundo def. Killshot (73/100) S02E02
Angelico def. Son of Havoc (73/100) S01E13
The Monster Matanza Cueto (w/Dario Cueto) (c) defeats Son Of Havoc – Lucha Underground Title Match (72/100) S03E01
Cage def. Prince Puma (72/100) S01E16
Jack Evans defeats Drago (72/100) S02E03
Matanza def. The Mack – Lucha Underground Title Match (72/100) S03E03
The Mack def. Cage (72/100) S01E35
Ivelisse, Angelico and Son of Havoc def. Drago, Fenix, Aerostar (72/100) S01E22
King Cuerno def. Killshot (71/100) S01E36
Drago defeats Hernandez – Believers Backlash (71/100) S01E38
Texano defeats Daga – Aztec Medallion Match (71/100) S02E12
Cage def. Texano (71/100) S03E03
The Monster Matanza Cueto (w/Dario Cueto) (c) defeats Killshot – Lucha Underground Title Match (71/100) S03E07
Cage defeats Chavo Guerrero Jr. (c) – Gift Of The Gods Title Match (71/100) S02E18
Hernandez def. Alberto El Patron (71/100) S01E27
Prince Puma def. King Cuerno (70/100) S01E22
Mundo, Evans, Super Fly, Hernandez def. Alberto, Drago, Sexy Star and Aerostar (70/100) S01E35
Texano def. Johnny Mundo by DQ (70/100) S01E37
Fenix def. Argentis (70/100) S01E14
Hernandez def. King Cuerno and Cage (69/100) S01E25
Drago drew with King Cuerno (69/100) S01E10
Mil Muertes def. Fenix (69/100) S01E17
Patron def. Texano – Bullrope Match (68/100) S01E20
Jack Evans, Johnny Mundo & PJ Black (w/Taya) (c) defeat Dragon Azteca Jr., Prince Puma & Rey Mysterio Jr. by DQ – Lucha Underground Trios Title Match (68/100) S02E19
Drago def. Aerostar (68/100) S01E13
Sexy Star & The Mariposa defeat Ivelisse & Taya – Aztec Medallions Parejas Increibles Tag Team Match (68/100) S02E22
Dragon Azteca Jr., Prince Puma & Rey Mysterio Jr. (c) defeat Ivelisse, Johnny Mundo & Son Of Havoc (w/Taya) – Lucha Underground Trios Title Match (67/100) S02E16
Johnny Mundo and Prince Puma def. Cortez Castro and Mr. Cisco w/Big Ryck (67/100) S01E02
Killshot defeats Argenis (67/100) S02E12
The Disciples Of Death (Barrio Negro, El Siniestro de la Muerte & Trece) (w/Catrina) defeat Angelico, Ivelisse & Son Of Havoc (66/100) S01E38
Drago def. Aerostar (66/100) S01E21
Aerostar def. Drago (66/100) S01E16
Cage def. Argentis, Angelico, Aerostar (66/100) S01E10
King Cuerno def. Drago (66/100) S01E06
Son Of Havoc defeats The Mack – Falls Count Anywhere (66/100) S02E24
Son Of Havoc defeats Daga (65/100) S02E19
Joey Ryan & The Crew (Cortez Castro & Mr. Cisco) defeat Marty Martinez, The Mack & The Mariposa – Trios Tournament First Round Match (65/100) S02E11
Prince Puma def. Cage by DQ (65/100) S01E12
Angelico, Ivelisse & Son Of Havoc defeat Chavo Guerrero Jr., Cortez Castro & Mr. Cisco (65/100) S02E04
Cisco and Cortez def. Son of Havoc and Angelico (65/100) S01E26
The Crew (Mr. Cisco, Cortez, Bael) def. Aerostar, Super Fly and Argentis (65/100) S01E12
Marty Martinez defeats The Mack (w/Sexy Star) (65/100) S02E07
King Cuerno defeats Mil Muertes (w/Catrina) (64/100) S02E23
Prince Puma def. Siniestro de la Muerte (64/100) S03E04
Angelico, Ivelisse & Son Of Havoc defeat The Disciples Of Death (Barrio Negro, El Siniestro de la Muerte & Trece) (w/Catrina) (c) – Lucha Underground Trios Title Vs. Lucha Underground Careers Match (64/100) S02E08
Mil Muertes def. Drago (64/100) S01E33
Cage def. Son of Havoc and The Mack (64/100) S01E23
Big Ryck def. The Crew (64/100) S01E19
El Siniestro de la Muerte, Killshot & Marty Martinez defeat Cortez Castro, Joey Ryan & Mr. Cisco – Aztec Medallions Six Man Tag Team Match (64/100) S02E22
Sexy Star and Fenix def. Pentagon Jr. and Chavo Guerrero Jr. (64/100) S01E06
Pentagon Jr. vs. Prince Puma – No Contest (63/100) S02E06
Mil Muertes def. Drago (63/100) S01E05
Jack Evans defeats PJ Black (63/100) S02E05
Johnny Mundo def. Aerostar (63/100) S01E29
Jack Evans def. Argentis (63/100) S01E30
King Cuerno def. Drago in a Last Luchadore Standing Match (62/100) S01E11
Pentagon Jr. def. Argentis (62/100) S01E18
Texano def. Alberto by DQ (62/100) S01E17
The Mack defeats PJ Black (62/100) S02E02
Killshot def. Marty “The Moth” Martinez (62/100) S02E17
Chavo Guerrero def. Fenix (62/100) S01E07
Marty The Moth def. Ivelisse (62/100) S03E08
Chavo Guerrero Jr. and Sexy Star def. Son of Havoc and Ivelisse (62/100) S01E02
Mil Muertes def. Fenix (61/100) S01E08
Drago def. King Cuerno (61/100) S01E04
Fenix def. Mil Muertes (60/100) S01E12
Chavo Guerrero Jr. defeats Aerostar and El Siniestro de la Muerte and Joey Ryan and Sexy Star and Texano and The Mack – Gift Of The Gods Title Seven Way Match (60/100) S02E17
Angelico, Ivelisse & Son Of Havoc (c) defeat The Disciples Of Death (Barrio Negro, El Siniestro de la Muerte & Trece) (w/Catrina) – Lucha Underground Trios Title Elimination Match (60/100) S02E10
Mil Muertes wins a 10-men Battle Royal (60/100) S01E08
Big Ryck, Killshot and The Mack def. Pentagon Jr, Sexy Star and Super Fly (60/100) S01E21
Mil Muertes def. Blue Demon Jr. (60/100) S01E02
Pentagon def. Sexy Star – Submission match (58/100) S01E30
Taya defeats Ivelisse (57/100) S02E26
Aerostar def. Cage, The Mack, Marty The Moth (57/100) S01E33
Sexy Star def. Super Fly – Mask vs. Mask (56/100) S01E22
Dragon Azteca Jr. defeats Chavo Guerrero Jr. – Special Referee Rey Mysterio Jr. (56/100) S03E04
Pentagon Jr. def. Famous B (56/100) S01E13
Fenix wins Battle Royal for the last Aztec Medallion (54/100) S01E37
Chavo Guerrero Jr. & The Crew (Cortez Castro & Mr. Cisco) defeat Texano (54/100) S02E05
Mil Muertes (w/Catrina) (c) defeats Ivelisse – Lucha Underground Title Match (54/100) S02E01
Pentagon Jr. def. Super Fly (54/100) S01E11
Texano defeats Chavo Guerrero Jr. (w/Cortez Castro & Mr. Cisco) – Bullrope Match (53/100) S02E08
The Monster Matanza Cueto (w/Dario Cueto) (c) defeats Fenix – Lucha Underground Title Match (53/100) S02E11
Son of Havoc, Angelico, Ivelisse def. Cage, Daivari, Ryck (53/100) S01E30
Mack def. Marty “The Moth” Martinez – Aztec Medallion match (53/100) S02E15
Dragon Azteca Jr. defeats Black Lotus by DQ (53/100) S02E26
Sexy Star def. Pentagon Jr. (53/100) S01E24
Ivelisse def. Mariposa w/Marty (53/100) S03E05
Big Ryck def. Prince Puma (52/100) S01E05
Cage defeats Joey Ryan (52/100) S02E04
Drago def. Hernandez by DQ (52/100) S01E34
Bengala def. Daivari (52/100) S01E36
Sexy Star (c) defeats Taya – Gift Of The Gods Title Match (51/100) S03E01
Cortez Castro & Mr. Cisco defeat Johnny Mundo & Taya (51/100) S02E10
King Cuerno def. Super Fly (51/100) S01E07
Pentagon Jr. & Prince Puma defeat The Disciples Of Death (Barrio Negro, El Siniestro de la Muerte & Trece) (w/Catrina) (51/100) S02E02
Prince Puma def. Marty “The Moth” Martinez (51/100) S01E28
Sexy Star def. Jack Evans (49/100) S03E06
Pentagon Jr. def. Vinny Massaro (48/100) S01E16
Pentagon Jr. def. Ricky Mandel (48/100) S01E14
Ivelisse defeats Kobra Moon (48/100) S02E11
The Disciples of Death def. Bengala, Mascarita Sagrada and Pimpi (48/100) S01E31
Angelico def. Ivelisse – Son of Havoc as a special guest referee (47/100) S01E18
The Monster Matanza Cueto (w/Dario Cueto) (c) defeats Pentagon Jr. – Lucha Underground Title Match (47/100) S02E10
Texano def. Daivari (47/100) S01E34
Prince Puma w/Konnan def. Chavo Guerrero w/The Crew – No DQ (46/100) S01E34
Sexy Star def. Ivelisse (46/100) S01E04
Pentagon Dark def. Cortez Castro (45/100) S03E04
Mil Muertes def. Chavo Guerrero by DQ (45/100) S01E15
Sexy Star, Mascarita and Pimpinella def. The Crew (45/100) S01E15
Daga def. Mascarita Sagrada, Kobra Moon and Argenis (44/100) S02E17
Alberto El Patron def. Marty ‘The Moth’ Martinez (43/100) S01E34
Johnny Mundo def. Big Ryck by DQ (43/100) S01E04
Joey Ryan defeats Mascarita Sagrada (w/Famous B & The Beautiful Brenda) (43/100) S02E18
Kobra Moon def. Sexy Star (43/100) S02E06
Sexy Star def. El Mariaci Loco (43/100) S01E11
Ivelisse def. Angelico (42/100) S01E15
Famous B and Dr. Wagner Jr. def. Son of Havoc and Mascarita Sagrada (42/100) S03E06
The Crew def. Escarlata and Mascarita (41/100) S01E11
Mil Muertes def. Ricky Mandel (40/100) S01E03
Kobra Moon defeats Bengala (40/100) S02E03
Killshot vs. Marty Martinez – Double Count Out (40/100) S02E20
Mil Muertes def. Famous B (39/100) S01E06
Mil Muertes def. Argenis (38/100) S03E02
Chavo Guerrero Jr. def. Blue Demon Jr – Anything Goes (38/100) S01E31
Mascarita Sagrada def. Son of Havoc (38/100) S01E05
Pimpinella Escarlata def. Son of Havoc (36/100) S01E06
Texano def. Super Fly (35/100) S01E15
Dr. Wagner Jr. (w/Famous B & The Beautiful Brenda) defeats Son Of Havoc (35/100) S02E24
The Mariposa (w/Marty Martinez) defeats Sexy Star (w/The Mack) (34/100) S02E10
Son of Havoc def. Sexy Star (32/100) S01E01
Daga defeats Mascarita Sagrada (w/Famous B & The Beautiful Brenda) – Aztec Medallion Match (32/100) S02E22
Blue Demon Jr. def. Chavo Guerrero Jr. (27/100) S01E01
Blue Demon Jr. (w/Cortez Castro & Mr. Cisco) defeats Texano – No Disqualification Match (27/100) S01E39
Big Ryck def. Sexy Star (27/100) S01E17
Cage def. Mascarita Sagrada (25/100) S02E15
Siniestro de la Muerte def. King Cuerno (23/100) S02E15
Super Fly def. Sexy Star (23/100) S01E33
Sexy Star def. Marty “The Moth” Martinez (21/100) S01E36
Joey Ryan def. Castro and Mr. Cisco – Aztec Medallion match (21/100) S02E16
The Mack def. Cage (20/100) S01E37
Dr. Wagner Jr. def. Mascarita Sagrada (20/100) S03E02
Mascarita Sagrada def. El Mariachi Loco (20/100) S01E03
Sexy Star def. Super Fly (16/100) S01E36
Chavo Guerrero def. Sexy Star by DQ (13/100) S01E05
Texano def. Daivari by DQ (12/100) S01E28
Delavar Daivari def. Texano by DQ (6/100) S01E26
Famous B vs. Vinny Massaro vs. Ricky Mandel vs. Argentis (5/100) S01E25

SEASON 1 EPISODE 1

Some miscreants attack a young man in the parking lot, so Dragon Azteca helps the boy out and asks if the cat knows something about lucha libre? This is dope, the montage, the vibrant colors. LU is an example of how character development can be done in 30 seconds or less. At first I thought that this was Prince Puma, but later in the show it appeared to be Dragon Azteca Jr.

Melissa, Vamp, Striker are all here… I really missed this show. Let’s rock!!

Blue Demon Jr. def. Chavo Guerrero Jr.

I honestly forgot who was in the first ever LU match, and I can see why. This was a slow start, and two veterans didn’t really click. Some awkward moments and botches here and there, not enough time or reason to get the story over, and Blue Demon (Striker calls him Deemon for some reason, but he’s a teacher, probably knows better than me) wins after a signature sumbission hold is applied. It was a story-driven match, but I still can’t say anything else but ‘meh’, with all the respect to both men. (D-)

Son of Havoc def. Sexy Star

Manly man Son of Havoc against a hero for all the girls, Sexy Star.

She had a promo before the match, and it was jarring because she can’t speak English very well… and they rolled same-language subtitles. Why not cut a promo on Spanish and then slapdash the text below? She can talk well enough.

The match was short and I’m not gonna lie, it was a bit funny that she lost after a simple backbreaker considering the hype she got. Sexy is hated by a lot of people, and altough I’m not one of them, I’ll say that she’s far from the level the announce team puts her on here. Still better than the opener… (D)

Johnny Mundo def. Prince Puma

First memorable match from this amazing TV show.

Two biggest stars have a nice tidy match that shows you what they can do, yet still leaves you asking for more. It’s not your batshit crazy spot fest, but a smooth and crisp back and forth contest, maybe even too smooth to feel real. Especially since they are fighting for $100,000 in storyline. It set the bar for the level of wrestling, but didn’t raise it too high.

Mundo entered the match as a cocky heel, but ended up being a face at the end. Puma was hyped as the local lad, and I think he was a bit handicapped portraying a new charachter he didn’t get a good feel of yet. Five more minutes of high-octane action wouldn’t hurt, but they didn’t want to hurt Mundo’s finish.

After the match we find out that Dario bamboozled Mundo, and The Crew attacked both guys. At least they didn’t get involved in the match… (B+)

Episode Rating: 68/100 (C+) Solid first effort, but not a blow away episode.

SEASON 1 EPISODE 2

Johnny Mundo and Prince Puma def. Cortez Castro and Mr. Cisco w/Big Ryck

God damn, Zeke is looking badass, he has some serious star quality. He smokes a cigar sitting on the stairs, and nobody will tell him off because he’s a fucking tank.

During the match Vamp keeps on ragging and shitting on Konnan, and also says he has never been in a bar fight. Shut up Vamp, nobody believes you. The match is surprisingly competitve, The Crew are not total job guys, even though they look like that. They even have a sweet Shatter Machine like tag team finish! No, they did not win, don’t worry.

Really fun opener, kept the energy high at all times. (C+)

Chavo Guerrero Jr. and Sexy Star def. Son of Havoc and Ivelisse

Chavo is a face now? Walked out from the tunnel last episode, now helps Sexy get her revenge.

Ivelisse pops out of nowhere, I don’t think there was any mention of her relationship with Havoc yet. Pretty fun match, Sexy looks better here, Chavo bounces back.

Two quick paced tag matches where faces win, a good watch. (C)

Mil Muertes def. Blue Demon Jr.

Catrina licked Demon before the match and he wiped. Can you believe that? What’s wrong with you, Deemon? This match gets an extra bonus for Catrina’s outfit, ho-ly shit she’s gorgeous.

Two guys are built like old school grapplers, there’s something cool about it. Mil has hair sticking out from his mask and he dons OG blue pants. Spear and Flatliner put Demon away, who’s then rescued and attacked by Chavo. He’s like the local Big Show, so many turns, sheesh. He takes out some job guys (Famous B?), referees and smacks a chair into Sexy’s head.

Welp, he stands in the ring full of laid out bodies. Melissa leads the chants against Chavo, that’s funny. (C)

Episode Rating: 70/100 (C+) Two fun matches, some notable debuts, stories develop.

SEASON 1, EPISODE 3

Mascarita Sagrada def. El Mariachi Loco

I don’t know how to rate this one. I like Mascarita, but this went on for too long.

He has an epic theme song, so that’s a bonus. Still, the weakest match I’ve seen so far. Post match Chavo attacks the little guy to establish himself as the top villain.

Always felt like Mascarita fit the tag team setting much more, he’s certainly a super entertaining performer. (E+)

Vampiro had a sit-down interview with Chavo, that was fun. All you have to know – Vampiro was wearing a fedora. Ain’t he awesome? (c) Then Chavo bumps into Konnan in a corridor, “the Mexicans are coming for him” for what he did to Blue Demon, Sexy and Mascarita, the whole country lololol. Too much Chavo, I guess he was involved in the writing of the first season… and then he booked to get himself licked by Catrina. What a master politician!

Mil Muertes def. Ricky Mandel

Awesome backstory of Mil, a boy who survived an earthquake and found comfort in death, narrated by Catrina.

Lots of focus on the stone, items play such a big role here. Before he was a doll worshipping weirdo, Ricky jobbed to Mil. Total squash, and an awesome Flatliner to put things away quickly. As Striker said, “I can watch Catrina clap all day”.

Right on, brother. Love the commentary too, but this was a presentation match. (D)

Pentagon Jr. vs. Drago vs. Fenix

So, three debutants in the main event, but we already know it’s going to be all killer no filler.

In storyline, all three a brought in by Konnan from Mexico, so Dario thought it would be funny to put them all against each other. Pentagon had his mannerisms since the start, Drago used to have mean teeth, and Fenix was positioned as the top prospect since day 1ish. Crazy match, lots of high spots. Liked it, but there were a couple of moments where guys were just standing for the next spot to happen or were flying in to recieve the moves.

Still, pretty cool, and this match saved the episode… (B-)

Episode Rating: 62/100 (C) Good enough, but so far the weakest show overall. What’s interesting, Dario was talking to Matanza at the end of the show, I didn’t know they planned so far ahead. Props to them! That’s why rewatching the show is so cool.

SEASON 1, EPISODE 4

Sexy Star def. Ivelisse

They finally mention that Ivelisse is romantically linked to Son of Havoc, Vamp said he thought they were a brother and sister. “Whatever floats your boat” replies Striker. How can you not like Son of Havoc’s glorious beard? The crowd was pretty hot for it, and of course Sexy won. Little bit too long imo. The story of Havoc having problems with “uneven” opponents continues. (D+)

Fenix def. Pentagon Jr.

I think this match goes under the radar as one of the better matches in season 1. No mention of their real life connection, and Pentagon is not as high on the totem pole. A very fun match with lots of crazy moves, Fenix is 2-0 over Penta. I think this match is a little bit better than Mundo/Puma… It is a real firecracker! Plus Pentagon can be a tad bit nasty, that makes his fights more believable and enjoyable for me. (B+)

Drago def. King Cuerno

Cuerno’s debut is hyped up a bit, but he loses in a short and fun match. I always liked Drago, but I think he ultimately was limited by his size to become a main event guy. Hol up, how old is he? Did you know that Drago is freaking 44 in 2020? Cuerno does his awesome Suicide Dive, or as Excalibur would shout, TOPE SUICIDA, what a nice move. A little bit short, but we have 4 matches this episode. (C)

Johnny Mundo def. Big Ryck by DQ

A short match designed solely to advance one of the stories. Ryck looks like a million bucks, but “can’t go”, if you will. Rare DQ finish, as Crew attacks Puma backstage and help Ryck put Mundo through a table. Konnan told Puma not to stick his nose in Mundo’s business, and while he did not, he still got his butt kicked. Go figure… (D)

Episode rating: 64/100 (C) Little bit better than last week, but the main event was nothing special. I’m still enjoying the show, the production quality, the juicy picture, and cool characters. All you need to have a good time.

SEASON 1, EPISODE 5

Mil Muertes def. Drago

Good for its lenght, Mil continues to be built like a tank. Cuerno watched on from the roof “like a hunter looks on his prey”, then hit Drago with a Michinoku Driver, or The Thrill of The Hunt. Mil needs someone to feud with, and knowing how it goes, we don’t have to wait for too long for that. (C)

Mascarita Sagrada def. Son of Havoc

Well, it was a comedy match and from a story perspective it was nice. Better than the match with Mariachi Loco for sure. Not sure how I feel about Havoc losing here clean… but that’s kind of what he was in season 1. I also like that he got paired with Ivelisse, who probably met Cross in their time on Tough Enough. Marty “The Moth” also came from there… maybe the show is not as useless as we like to think? Oh snap, Mundo was there too a long time ago. Anyone else? After a bit of Googling it appears that Chelsea Green aka Reklusa also appeared on the show. Interesting indeed. (D-)

Chavo Guerrero def. Sexy Star by DQ

One the weakest match so far. Not even much of a match, looked and felt like an angle. Sexy grabs the chair and low blows the ref who did nothing wrong, while Chavo stands on his knees begging not to be smacked. Penta snatches the chair from Sexy and teases an attack for too long. Fenix comes out for the rescue, Penta once again holds the chair near his head for a dropkick to happen… not a fan of this. Perhaps the lowest point of Penta’s career in LU. (F)

Big Ryck def. Prince Puma

Effectively a 3-on-1 handicap match involving The Crew. Puma sells for most of the fight, then Mundo makes a grand entrance clearing the house. He accidentally bashes Puma, gets taken out with a Shatter Machine and then Puma is thrown through the table. This is probably the best Ryck could look, and he still was so-so. Looks like a million bucks, but fights like a tenner. (C-)

Episode Rating: 58/100 (C-) You can’t have a killer show every single week, and I’ve enjoyed every episode so far, but this is still pretty average. Black Lotus showed up for the first time, thought that deserved a mention.

SEASON 1, EPISODE 6

Pimpinella Escarlata def. Son of Havoc

Another comedy match to continue a storyline that Son of Havoc has been involved in since the first episode. Not terrible, the crowd is into it, but the finish is once again kinda questionable, as Son of Havoc loses to a roll up after a kiss. Mascarita joined the winner after the match for a dance… Pimpi’s music kinda slaps. (D-)

Mil Muertes def. Famous B

Hey, it’s our boy Famous B! Pre 423-Get-Fame of course. This is the definition of a squash match, Catrina licks Famous B after the match. Lots of intimacy in the Temple tonight. (D-)

King Cuerno def. Drago

A rematch, this match went a little bit longer, and they showed us a bit more, but not the whole deal. It’s like they are teasing us for the next match, and I don’t mind. They are 1-1 and they will go all out next time, I suppose. (C+)

Before the main event Johnny (who grabbed the key from Dario earlier) demands his $100.000, fights Ryck, listens to what Konnan has to say, then also fights Puma… Cueto comes out and books a triple threat ladder match with the briefcase being on the line. I like this storyline, and the dynamic of all three dudes. Cueto puts the money that belonged to Ryck as a “signing bonus”.

Sexy Star and Fenix def. Pentagon Jr. and Chavo Guerrero Jr.

It started off a bit like a classical tag match you would see in WWE, but then they said “fuck it” and it became fun for a bit. Chavo bailed on Penta who eats another fall, and he is 0-3 now. Tough break, pinned by Sexy now, and not Fenix. Pretty good match, but not a must watch. (C)

Episode Rating: 61/100 (C) Another thumbs in the middle show, but next week promises to be special.

SEASON 1, EPISODE 7

King Cuerno def. Super Fly

Cuerno’s storyline with Drago continues, a pretty straight forward victory here. Sadly no Tope… Fly hit one good move to the outside and did not kick out of the Michinoku Driver. Don’t really remember much about Super Fly in Lucha Underground, but he’s not awful. 51/100 (D+)

Chavo Guerrero def. Fenix

Penta gets a nice hype video, he’s in Chavo’s corner. Fenix is followed by Sexy Star. A pretty good match, but nothing super special. Chavo worked over the knee and got a tainted win after Penta clipped his bro. I appreciate Chavo’s ability, but he pulls the blanket too much on myself. That’s Fenix first loss in The Temple too. 62/100 (C)

Johnny Mundo def. Prince Puma and Big Ryck

Johnny gets his hard earned 100.000 at last!

A pretty good match, lots of brutal spots. Did not like B-Boy getting involved in the finish, or The Crew, for that matter, but they took some nasty bumps. The highlight is Ryck throwing Puma through a ladder, no doubt. After the match Mundo knocks out Dario and drops the key on him. Enjoyable storyline, and the right finish.

The match was slow in some places, but still good. 76/100 (B-)

Show Rating: 64/100 (C) Really solid show, and the book is closed on the first big story involving Mundo and Puma. I have lost the notes about angles sadly, and don’t have the chance to rewatch once again, but in 3-4 episodes I will go into more detail about overall stories.

SEASON 1, EPSIODE 8

Fenix wins a 10-way

Unbelievable action, no stops, everyone looks good and it’s the epithomy of fun. I love this match, just 10 guys having fun, trying to impress Machete aka Danny Trejo with their moves. You need to check this out, you will not be disappointed. 85/100 (B+)

Mil Muertes wins a 10-men Battle Royal

All the cool and fly cats were involved in the first match… well, except Mundo. He is the MVP of this bout, carrying it to the end. Not even close to the first match, and a little bit too long. But it serves the purpose. 60/100 (C)

Mil Muertes def. Fenix

And so they meet for the first time. No, it’s not a classic just yet. But I can’t wait for their feud to start rolling. Pretty short, the story is a typical one – the brute vs. the underdog. Flatliner puts Fenix out, Catrina does her thing. 61/100 (C)

Final Rating: 71/100 (B-)

I liked this show, especially the first match. Plus the episode itself had a storyline of it’s own, which is always a positive thing in my book. Fenix vs. Mil is perhaps the second greatest rivalry in Lucha Underground history, but I can be wrong, because the show is full of classic feuds. ‘Unique Opportunity’ is a great gimmick for troll Dario.

SEASON 1, EPISODE 9

Aztec Warfare I

What a great match, they literally tore the ring here.

Started off by Johnny and Fenix, and it never let you off its hook. Amazing storytelling, the only gripe I have concerns Chavo. He likes to dish out unprotected chairshots and doesn’t take them himself. The story of Mundo lasting until the end to duke it out with Puma once again is just perfect and really highlights the power of long-term booking. The best LU match so far, not ideal, but a must watch nontheless.

The only negative is Penta getting eliminated early, but that would be for the better. 91/100 (A)

Show Rating: 85/100 (B+) By far the best show yet! And altough we saw only one match, it raised the bar to the whole new level.

SEASON 1, EPISODE 10

Cage def. Argentis, Angelico, Aerostar

Cage debuts with an impressive display in this 4-way elimination. Notice how all of his opponents start with A in their names? That’s some lazy booking. Kidding. He took out everybody, Angelico was the last to bite the dust. He and Argentis looked good, this was a very fun opener. The Machine is quite underrated, but then again, he’s catapulted into the AEW main event now. (C+) 66/100

Drago drew with King Cuerno

Match #3, still not a blow off. It is kept fairly short, with the big finish being Drago flying off the top of the office on Cuerno on top of the table. Nice spot, double count out. Perhaps it’s too short to count, but it proves that matches don’t have to be 30 minutes long to serve the goal of entertaining fans. But yeah, it still feels like they are extending the program just because. (C+) 69/100

Prince Puma def. Fenix

Very nice match with a tidy, amazing finish. They could have done even more, definetly. Great display of athleticism, and the story is not too bad either. After the match debutant Cage destroys Puma… He has a habit of cutting the line, this Cage guy. (B+) 87/100

Show Rating: 78/100 (B) An enjoyable viewing, the flip-a-palooza from Puma and Fenix is a much watch. I’m not against Cage getting pushed, his wrestling style is fitting a lot of top guys. Thumbs up!

SEASON 1, EPISODE 11

The Crew def. Escarlata and Mascarita

Yeah, this is not a thing you jump off your chair for. Crew are pretty capable, Pimpi and Mascarita are pretty entertaining, but you don’t want to put them together. I guess The Crew had to get a victory after dumping Big Ryck and putting a cigar into his eye. (D-) 41/100

Pentagon Jr. def. Super Fly

Penta wins! Penta wins! Finally. This is probably the point when Vamp scratched his head and offered to do something with the guy, as after the match Pentagon mentions his maestro. I’m all for a badass Penta who’s working solo and has some time on the mic. Don’t get me wrong, Lucha Bros are dope, but I believe that Penta is overshadowed by Fenix in the tag team. (C-) 54/100

Sexy Star def. El Mariaci Loco

Once again, not the match you’re tuning in for. I personally like Mariachi and the backstory of him being hired from the restaraunt down the corner. Sexy picks up the win, and honestly, I kinda can’t tell you what is her finisher of the top of my head. And she wins a lot here! Yeah, no thanks. (D-) 43/100

King Cuerno def. Drago in a Last Luchador Standing Match

Well, this was quite underwhelming for a finish of their feud. The finish of Cuerno tying up Drago to the buckles feels kinda cheap. The match is good, but after all this time of build up, I expected a remarkable finish. Cuerno gets the W, so the winner is right. (C) 62/100

Final Rating: 58/100 (C-) Overall this was the weakest show in season 1 so far. Next week promises to be better, as Puma/Cage progresses with a match. Episode 12 review and onwards will feature vignette notes, those are far too important to leave out.

SEASON 1, EPISODE 12

Short vignette with Cage pumping iron ahead of his match with Puma. Dario slides in and says that Cage took the bull by his huevos (balls) attacking the champ. Cage says he’s a machine and he will win tonight. He really looks like a million bucks. I don’t know why WWE released him and how he missed out on the place in TNA once. His mic work is not the best, but he has some serious intensity. We’re ready for the first bout…

Fenix def. Mil Muertes

A storyline match, where Fenix hooked Mil’s leg after getting a Superplex. Somewhat of an upset, Muertes threw some mean haymakers. Ok bout, but nothing special just yet. No licking for Catrina tonight. (C) 60/100

Another little promo for Cage, now he nonchalantly beats about 6-7 hooligans in the parking lot. Puma struggled with similar shmucks in the season opener, so a nice touch ahead of their meeting.

The Crew (Mr. Cisco, Cortez Castro, Bael) def. Aerostar, Super Fly and Argentis

A pretty good match, but there’s a certain lack of star quality here for the match lenght. The workers are very solid. B-Boy was a PWG regular, Ricky Reyes had some moments in ROH. Cisco is lesser known, and his face is funny, but it was him who put a cig to Ryck’s eye. Shatter Machine, good bout. 65/100 (C)

Interesting interview with Vamp and Konnan. Vampiro tried to talk to the champ, but K-Dawg answered all questions for him, driving the fedora-wearing announcer mad. They teased a fight but did not come to blows. Puma really didn’t stand out here at all, acting as a backdrop.

Prince Puma def. Cage by DQ

A world title match. They have pretty good chemistry, complementing each other well. Cage is deceptively agile and Puma is sneaky strong. The action is good, but then Cage gets mad and hits Puma in the huevos. Not a fan of the fuck finish. After the bell Cage beats Puma, bloodies Konnan and tears the belt in half. I love the current version much more, but I felt sad that the title got destroyed like that. Puma did too, he looked at it like it was a broken toy. 65/100 (C)

We also get Black Lotus confronting Dario and asking him about Matanza. Dario says he knows nothing about that. Good acting from Cueto!

Show Rating: 64/100 (C) It was solid, but not fireworks. No stand out matches, an even flow. Feel like next episode will be stronger.

SEASON 1 EPISODE 13

A short recap for the last episode, judging from the episode name we’re having a big main event.

Angelico def. Son of Havoc

And so one of the better season 1 storylines begins! I like Angelico’s theme, and he looks “marketable” if you will. Havoc and Ivellise are fun, and this a very good opener. In the end Havoc accidentally shoulder tackles Ivelisse and gets pinned. Definetly a good watch. 73/100 (B-)

Johnny Mundo is back. Probably burned through his 100 grand already. Dario offers him to forget the past and puts him in the main event against Cage. Johnny says Dario better get a new belt, Cueto is irritated.

Sweet vignette for Penta, he says that his fighting style knocks all other out of the park. He proceeds to lay out karate, jiu jitsu, taekwondo, MMA guys… ok. Sweet production!

Pentagon Jr. def. Famous B

Famous B pre “423 get fame” still. Squash match for Pentagon, who makes B tap out in his standing armbar, then breaks the first arm! Fans support him, Penta tells his master that he is ready. It’s good, and serves a purpose. 56/100 (C-)

Dario tells Matanza that Black Lotus is looking for him. “Back then she was a little girl, but you have to see her now” and Cueto says he needs to protect this temple from Matanza.

Drago def. Aerostar

Very fun back and forth lucha libre bout. The only nitpick I have is that Striker talked about how every win means more money in the bank account. Dude… you have a guy from outer space and a human fire-breathing lizard in the ring. Anyway, good match, altough not very long. They shake hands after the fight, a start of the beautiful relationship. 68/100 (C+)

Catrina finds Fenix backstage, flirts with him, points out to a tattoo on his chest, and finally kisses him. She then tells him to keep it between them, as if Mil found out, they would both be buried alive.

Cage def. Johnny Mundo

Cage appeared with the torn title around his neck. Well, this went great but then King Cuerno had to interfere and attack Mundo’s knee. Cueto said now that he’s friends with Johnny, he will restart the match. Mundo asks are you kidding me, but fights valiantly before falling to Weapon X. Very good, but could be better without Cuerno. 83/100 (B)

After the show Dario talks to someone on the phone. Papa Cueto maybe? He says that she knows about Matanza and then someone knocks on the door. The show is over! No, it has just statred. Alberto El Patron steps in, well-well.

Final Rating: 78/100 (B) Two good fights, storyline work is great as always.

SEASON 1 EPISODE 14

El Jefe and El Patron have a passive agressive conversation in the office. Alberto asks Dario about the key, but the question is ignored. Vague exchnage of words, we’ll see what they are on about soon.

Fenix def. Argentis

Argentis gets a job entrance, Fenix is extra oily and he is in pink!

Even that doesn’t stop him from being well-supported, altought a couple of episodes ago there were dueling chants. This is a great opener, with lots of crazy moves. There were some awkward moments in the beginning, but still, Fenix is simply insane. Near the end of the match Catrina joined the ringside and licked the fallen Argentis to “send a message” to her true love.

During the match Vamp admitted he’s a pervert, oh well. 70/100 (C+)

Catrina comes back to rub some salt into Mil’s wounds, so he chokes her a bit and yells in her face. Then he goes down the corridor and bumps into Chavo. Pushes him against the wall and says he will see him next week. What is their beef again? Perhaps because Chavo interfered in the Blue Demon match at the start of the season? I seriously forgot, and I started rewatching not so long ago.

We are also informed that Patron will “speak his mind”. Ugh… the WWE influence is strong here, but the production level is way higher.

Extra cool Big Ryck vignette. This MFer confesses in the booth that he’s about to sin, laying out how he’s going to destroy Castro, Cisco and Bael. He then lights up a cigar and leans in so we can see his eyepatch. Who smokes in the confession booth? Big Ryck. Like this a lot, his vengeance is coming.

Son of Havoc and Ivelisse are standing in the ring. Last time they had a spat, as Ivelisse was accidentally hit in the Angelico/SoH match. Now Havoc says he’s glad that Cueto gave him a worthy opponent in Mundo, and dedicates this upcoming match to the baddest bitch in this building and the love of his life! Awww, he’s such a romantic!

Johnny Mundo def. Son of Havoc

Good match, a pretty long one too. Johnny sold his leg after an attack by King Cuerno, but it was a pacy affair with plenty of althletic spots. Thing I like about Havoc is his flagstand elbow drop move, so dope. Havoc is close to victory, but for some reason he’s super slow to execute a Shooting Star Press. Mundo raises his knees, and ends this bout with a Fin del Mundo. 76/100 (B-)

Ivelisse looks on for Havoc thinking about something, and then Cuerno runs out to attack Mundo once again.

Pentagon Jr. def. Ricky Mandel

Before the bout Vamp rants about Ricky Mandel confusing him for Rick Martel, fun bit. The ring is very screechy tonight. It’s a slow paced squash, with Penta dishing out chops and breaking up his pin attempt. He wins by submission once again, and then breaks Ricky’s arm. 2 Penta – Bones 0. 48/100 (D+)

We get a long winded El Parton promo where he is talking about his familia, upbringing, and why he left WWE. During the promo the lights went crazy, people seemed to love the mic work. It was pretty passionate, but this is not Lucha Underground style at all. Alberto is the AAA Mega Champ, and he gets attacked by Texano with the signature rope. Texano says the title belongs to him, and soon enough it will be on his waist. Meh… not a super original take, but it’s ok.

Final Rating: 63/100 (C) A lot of promos tonight, ending the show on Patron wasn’t cool for my liking. Two good matches, and Pentagon is one win away from breaking even on his win/loss record.

SEASON 1, EPISODE 15

A recap of last episode, and we’re getting some explanation between Chavo/Mil match. Basically Guerrero denied Mil an attack like 10 episodes ago, and Muertes decides that now is a good time to right the wrongs.

Mil Muertes def. Chavo Guerrero by DQ

Mil entered the match without Catrina, but she joined us near the end, dragging the stone across the apron to distract her man.

Chavito picked up the chair and smacked it across Muertes’ back. Mil knocks it out with his fist and gives Chavo a Flatliner on the chair after the match. Then Mil drags Catrina by the hair for her to lick Chavo, she doesn’t want to. He gets her up for a Flatliner, but here’s Fenix saving the day. And then Catrina kisses Fenix while looking at Mil… damn.

The match was sucky though. 45/100 (D+)

Black Lotus breaks into some door and takes the steps. That’s it. Meanwhile Dario rewards The Crew with a main event spot. He wants Sexy Star, Pimpi and Mascarita gone from his temple, so it’s No DQ. Well, that explains why Dario put Son of Havoc against them – he thought Son of Havoc would destroy them all. Interesting! Ryck is coming though.

Son of Havoc and Ivelisse are out. Since Havoc lost so many matches, Ivelisse says she will take care of Angelico tonight. Sick burn judging by the fan reactions…

Ivelisse def. Angelico

Ivelisse is sporting the iconic gold pants. You know, those pants? Anyway. They have some “I don’t really want to fight you” spots from Angelico, Ivelisse is throwing kicks and eventually pins the guy who’s twice as tall as she is after Havoc boots him in the neck. 42/100 (D)

After the match Angelico offers Ivelisse a one-on-one match without her BF in the future. Cheeky bastard! But now I understand why he never talks, he doesn’t have a deep voice. Love the storyline, but the match is nothing special.

In a short backstage interview Texano says that Patron didn’t win the title from him – he stole it. That’s why he’s here – to destroy Alberto. All spanish in this promo.

Texano def. Super Fly

Not even a squash match, Texano just wins after a good looking backbreaker-neckbreaker combo. Better than the one Miz uses I guess. Nothing special for my liking. Post match Patron tackles Texano, they brawl a bit and Patron scares his enemy away with the bullrope. He stole his title, and his weapon! Mama Mia. 35/100 (E)

Cage storms in to demand a championship status, Dario books a non-title match for next week, Cage says ok and throws the ripped in half title to Cueto. Then Chavo runs in and tells Dario he quits, and he’s scared that the whole Mexico comes after him. Dario wishes him luck in his future endevaours, Guerrero for some reason is surprised. I don’t get Chavo, really. Not his best work. At the end Dario adds that “the Gods will not be pleased about it” looking at the belt. That’s why I rewatch!

Black Lotus enters Matanza’s lair and tells him she dreamed of killing him for her entire life. Cut…

Sexy Star, Mascarita and Pimpinella def. The Crew

Pimpinella comes out to Sexy Star’s music for the main event. Yep. Last time we saw Sexy she beat El Mariachi Loco. Pimpi is taken out by the kendo stick, now Cortez is covered in glitters. Mascarita taken out with a Powerbomb on the apron and curb stomp on the chair!!

Now it’s just Sexy Star. She’s not a bad wrestler at all, and she valiantly fights them off for a couple of minutes, and then they just stomp her. Wait a sec… it’s Big Ryck’s beef! He’s clean shaven too.

Rick’s bouncing titties distract Cisco (that name is very familiar to the russian word sis’ka which means a “tit”) and Sexy wins with a roll up. Ryck doesn’t get physcial, just stares down the trio with his one good eye. 45/100 (D)

Sexy celebrates with a busted mouth, and I’m going crazy with these pictures.

Show Rating: 52/100 (D+) Not a good show match-wise, but still fun. Mil is not a best bout machine usually, the rest of the matches were driven by storylines. You wouldn’t miss too much if you skipped this episode.

SEASON 1, EPISODE 16 (CAGED ANIMALS)

We start a episode with a recap of Cage’s destruction.

Gotta credit Konnan, he bled profusely after an attack, looked brutal. Cage tore the belt and by some logic beat two of the biggest faces in the company. Well, he had an intentional DQ against Puma… anyway, he’s positioned as a top star.

There’s also a moment showing Black Lotus entering Matanza’s place and having her head being put in the bag… huh, don’t remember that. She’s been kidnapped and is now tied up in someone’s trunk. This storyline flew over me somehow before, so I’m intereseted to know what the heck happened there. (So judging from the story it was Prince Puma who abducted her, not Dragon Azteca, as he was banished from entering The Temple).

Mariachi El Bronx are performing, I liked this idea, inviting musicians to keep people warm during the intermission. We’re ready for a rematch between Drago and Aerostar!

Aerostar def. Drago

I always loved Drago’s jelly tongue and attire. Aerostar is amazing too, but he sounds a bit like Johnny Ace. Let’s just say that he’s a dynamic dude.

Striker mentions that Aerostar feeds off from the heavens, and Drago feeds off the depth of Earth… Better than the whole deal with paycheks. Aerostar wears a snazzy black and yellow outfit, costumes always look great here. The match is really fun, and warms up the crowd with some high spots. It’s not very long, and there have been some miniscule errors, but overall, a very good opener.

It’s 1-1 between friends, Drago’s gimmick is fighting the same guys over and over again, I guess. (C+) 66/100

Post match Dario arrives and says that he’s making it a series and a winner will get his unique opportunity™. Luchadores don’t mind. Best of five it is.

A little hype video showing how Cuerno trains his insane Suicide Dive.

Look at me, I’m evolving. A bit off center, but I’m learning. Cuerno looks like an Olympic diver in there. More importantly, Mundo vs. Cuerno is coming! And now we have Puma/Cage!

Cage def. Prince Puma

Puma is fighting in the middle of the card, and has no title yet… weird to see that. Couple of rough spots at the start, but Puma is the flashiest dude in the industry.

There have been three or four GIF-worthy moments from this fun bout. It wasn’t long and had a fuck finish of sorts. Vamp kept repeating how he doesn’t know if Puma can make it without K-Dawg, and then he appears and throws the white towel in to “save” his protege. Well, it’s not a title match, so it seems like a not-so-bad decision. (B-) 72/100

Backstage Konnan quotes “The Art of War” stating that it’s all about deception, cabron.

Strong and independent woman Sexy Star wants no help from Big Ryck to fight The Crew. They sent Pimpi and Mascarita to the hospital, and now the same is waiting for them. Dario is a sly dog (c) and he books Ryck vs. Sexy instead… the winner gets all three. Screw that.

Pentagon Jr. def. Vinny Massaro

Extremely short match, and Penta debuts Pentagon Driver as a finisher. He then gets the table into the ring and powerbombs Vinny through it, then breaks his arm. 3 arms broken, I’m keeping the count. (D+) 48/100

It’s time for our main event. Cuerno vs. Mundo, who’s so pissed he doesn’t even pose for us.

King Cuerno drew with Johnny Mundo following a double count out

Cheap finish, but they had a very good match before the bell, and a good fight after the bell. What can I say, Mundo has the most gracious moveset in pro wrestling IMO, and Cuerno’s “Arrow of Death” move velocity makes Edge’s Spear look like pure manure. At the end Mundo sends Cuerno through the fence, Smack Down: Here Comes The Pain style! 75/100 (B-)

The TV show ends with Dragon Azteca asking Black Lotus the infamous “what do you know about lucha libre?” question and leaning forward to get her out of the trunk. I don’t know how I’ve missed this story altogether when viewing LU first time.

Final Rating: 74/100 (B-) Altough we had two dirty finishes, a squash and a rematch from last episode, the show felt fresh and was entertaining from start to finish. I’m watching it past midnight, it’s 1:13 AM for me now and I’m not feeling bad about effing up my productivity for tomorrow. This is awesome. Very fun episode!

SEASON 1, EPISODE 17 (A WAR STARTED IN MEXICO)

Alberto is in Dario’s office. Cueto teases Patron, suggesting his first match will be against Ricky Mandel or Famous B. Alberto loses his shit and says he wants only Texano. Flips the red bull statue, which was used by young Matanza to kill Mama Cueto. That’s from Lucha Underground comic series, there were only 4 issues though. Cueto says ok, that sounds like a good main event.

The band playing for the next 2-3 episodes is Amandititita, if anyone is interested. The first match is pretty huge.

Mil Muertes def. Fenix

Mil is without Catrina once again. Fenix jumps on Muertes from the stairs, nice. You know, Mil is an old school kind of guy, one of his best moves is a simple punch to the face. It takes someone to sell it good though, but how awesome it can look?

There are a bunch of other awesome moves, from both guys, but the match is all about the emotion and the storyline revolving around Catrina. People sympathize with Mil and some portions of the crowd chant that Fenix sucks, even calling Fenix an asshole for stepping intimately close to Catrina after the match.

I’m kinda going overboard with GIF making, but holy shit those moves deserve it! Codebreaker from the top rope? Hell yeah! Mil wins clean after a Flatliner… good match, but I would like it to get more time. 69/100 (C+)

Mil manhandles Catrina after the match, but gets dropped with the stone and a Spinning Kick. Catrina licks Mil’s torso, shuck ducky quack quack what kind of porn is that? “Spicy Aztec Cuck Watches Leathered HOTTIE Lick One Big Stud”. I feel like this can become a recurring segment in my reviews. Catrina then kisses Fenix too, and almost licks the stone, almost…

“Evil Ways” song plays!! BY GAWD, AJ STYLES IS IN LUCHA UNDERGROUND!?? WHO IS IT??!! BUH-BEE LASHLEY, THAT’S IT!! No, it’s just a badass vignette for Konnan plotting revenge on Cage in the rain. Art of War quotes are added to the video, it is kinda cool. No Puma though… oh well.

My favorite trio of Angelico, Ivelisse and Son of Havoc are standing before Dario. Ivelisse says she’s the baddest b**** in the building, and she should be a number one contender. Cueto scoffs at that and books a rematch between them, also making Son of Havoc a special guest ref. Ive grabs her man’s beard and takes him out of the office, Dario asks Angelico to close the door behind himself.

Puma takes out his frustrations on the punching bag when patron strolls in and plays a role of the cocky older brother, teasing the current champ and asking him about Konnan. He also says that he’s coming for that title… no words from Puma. I don’t like this, as Patron is in a “bloody feud” with Texano. Camera zooms on Alberto’s merch and we’re done.

Big Ryck def. Sexy Star

My exact reaction to Sexy pushed to the main event

Sexy Star in cargo inspired attire and clean shaven, eye-patch wearing Ryck. Winner gets a 3 on 1 match with The Crew… how is that a reward though? Sexy tries to do something, but her shoulders are pinned with force to the mats. Smart finish, as Ryck is somewhat of a babyface now. 27/100 (E-)

The Crew come out after the bell, and they hit Sexy with a Shatter Machine. Ryck has a slow start but powers out. Soon the revenge will be his, probably.

Patron gets a nice footage before the match, highlighting his upbrining, career in USA, big return to Mexico and now his unfinished business in the States. He is trying to get over the catchprase “My name is Alberto. El Patron… But you already knew that”.

*Winks in perro*

Texano def. Alberto by DQ

Well this was pretty uninspiring.

Matt and Vamp tried to big up how big those guys are, but who cares. Their offence is pretty basic, and it was a simple match, altough not a bad one. It was just pretty boring in my honest opinion. Not the main event in my book… Patron brings the sandpaper snake and wallops Texano with it. Looks painful! 62/100 (C)

Last scene we see is Cuerno promising Cueto to mount Johnny’s head on the wall following their cage match next week. Should be good!

Show Rating: 63/100 (C) Not a standout episode, but I liked the opener and some vignettes. Next week will probably break this episode across the knee.

SEASON 1, EPISODE 18 (NO ESCAPE)

Pentagon, Ivelisse/Angelico/Son of Havoc, Mundo/Cuerno all get their 10 seconds of spotlight before we begin this episode. I’m excited, we have the first ever steel cage match!

Pentagon Jr. def. Argentis

So this is not a usual squash match where Pentagon just destroys his opponent and breaks the arm. Here Argentis dominates for the first part of the match, and only in the end Penta turns up the heat. His moveset is amazing, I really dig this dropkick of his. Vampiro marking out is a special bonus I guess.

Argentis busted out a cool Frankensteiner before that too. Penta wins by submission after he locks Argentis’ arm in the standing armabar after a Run Up Package Piledriver. This match had also a lot of cuts to celebrities watching, one of them was Josh Barnett. 62/100 (C)

Penta breaks the 4th arm (Famous B, Ricky Mandel, Vinny, Argentis) yells that he’s ready and that nobody can stop him! Cero Miedo, the whole 9 yards.

Little promo for the upcoming cage match, then Catrina approaches Fenix, saying that the only way to defeat Mil is to bury him. Fenix puckers up, but not for a kiss – its his intense face.

Another “look-at-how-cool-I-am-standing-in-this-rain” hype video for Konnan. I like it, but Puma getting that spotlight would make more sense IMO. But it’s K-Dawg revenge, and he has a mean metal walking stick in his hands now. He did it himself too!

There’s also King Cuerno driving his stylish pickup truck to the Temple. It says “15 minutes before the cage match”… Consumate professional he is. What about the warm up? Or the hunter doesn’t need one? I guess we will see.

Angelico def. Ivelisse (Son of Havoc as a special guest referee)

Striker asks Vamp if he’s a fan of Angelico, Vamp just says “no”. Rude. Altough he adds the girls are freaking out, that’s at least some acknowledgement. “He has a nice waistline, but that’s not my thing” Son of Havoc is a special guest referee, he looks good in the stripes.

Well, this is a tough match to rate. Angelico made Ivelisse look so much better than she really is, and the bout was full of sexual innuendos and kinky pin positions that didn’t sit well with our referee. Not sure I will gif some of the moves out of Joey Ryan’s playbook, but there was a nice corkscrew near the start.

I like the dynamic and the story between the three, but I can’t rate this match too highly. Havoc gives Angelico a fast count to get the stud off his significant other. 47/100 (D+)

Catrina calls Mil a lil boy and informs us that next week there will be a match with Grave Consequences. Oh yeeeeah. Muertes is supposed to be a heel, but my sympathy is with him here, but then again, he put his hands on Catrina before, so maybe he deserves it. It’s going to be a firecracker match.

The old school cage is in place, and while it doesn’t seem to be super stable, it still adds to the visual. The only thing is, you can escape it to win the match, but I though the episode was called “No Escape”?

Johnny Mundo def. King Cuerno in a Cage match

The tempo wasn’t as fast in this gimmick match, but there was plenty of “let me rub your back and face across the cage” spots.

The cling of the metal is my personal favorite here, and of course all the innovative moves Johnny has in his locker. Cuerno has that snap to his moves, but his most famous move is not happening today, sadly.

Liked the spot where they traded pucnhes in the corner and fell flat on their faces simultaneously.

It almost looks like a botch, but for me, it makes it a bit more real, even though it is obvious this is not how real people fight.

They get a lot of time to pace themselves, and of course Johnny doesn’t take the escape finish, opting in to hit a beautiful high fly move (Whisper in the Wind?) from the top of the cage!

Johnny wins the match and comes out as a winner from yet another feud. 83/100 (B)

Show Rating: This was a better show than episode 17. Solid main event, some fun undercard bouts and juicy vignettes. It’s hard to bump into a meh episode of LU, so far I have only encountered one or two, and even then I enjoyed every single episode. 74/100 (B-)

SEASON 1, EPISODE 19 (GRAVE CONSEQUENCES)

Today we get Ryck/Crew, Drago/Aerostar and of course Fenix/Catrina/Mil.

Catrina doxxed Mil during this promo video, his name is Pasqual Mendoza. Well, our opener is read, it’s the Best of 5 series match.

Aerostar def. Drago

Both luchadores have one win to their name, this is of course match number 3.

It starts “friendly” with guys trading holds in a tidy chain wrestling sequence, then the tempo picks up and they are jumping in and out in a frenzy! Very fun back and forth match, lots of cool moves and spots.

For me, this is a perfect opener.

Fun and exciting, but doesn’t go on for too long. Aerostar picks up a victory after a Tadpole Splash, but before that he walked on the second rope to send Drago to the mats. 75/100 (B-)

Another Konnan promo, now about chess. I like it, very cool. Puma jobs to K-Dawg in a chess match though, but just look at this picture. Pure awesomeness… why are masked luchadores not hanging out in my park?

Big Ryck def. The Crew

I like how all three are coming from “the streets” in Melissa’s intro. Ryck is a tank, and he fends of all three well. This is an elimination type handicap match, so he destroys them one by another. Bael gets thrown into the chair in the corner, Cortez gets a kendo stick assisted lariat, and finally Cisco gets Uranage’d on the chair!

This was a squash match, and Ryck looked great here. Sexy actually interfered to kick Cisco back into the ring from the stairs. 64/100 (C)

Two huge matches announced for episode 20. AAA Mega Championship will be defended ina Bullrope match between Patron and Texano, while Puma calls out Cage for a Boyle Heights Street fight and puts the title on the line.

We’re ready for a Casket match! People in facepiant carry out a coffin, I bet some of those people is Thunder Rosa aka Kobra Moon. Maybe not, too lazy to check.

Fenix def. Mil Muertes in a Grave Consequences Match

I have no words. Scrap it… HOLY SHIT! This was a war.

Mil was so pissed he hit a tope on Fenix to start the match. Catrina is with the technico, but she’s just looking from the side. Muertes turns the tempo up and is even more brutal than he usually is. He slams and throws fenix around like a rubber ball, DDT’s him on the coffin, trashes the flower decorations. It is one chaotic brawl, and Mil picks up a coffin to block Fenix’s Suicide Dive!!

He goes for the mask, ripping it completely! Like if you pause the video, you can see Fenix’s face in details. Kinda reminds me of TJP, but the blood is too much, as Muertes unhooks the bottom rope to bash fenix with a screw. Too much blood, this is gory, and Mil bites the lad in his forehead!! THIS is Mil Muertes that I know, he looks best in this environment.

Backdrop on the coffin, ouch. My favorite top rope codebreaker, it looks so brutal. Mil is in total control, but not really. Even Catrina takes a bump, but then assists Fenix and slam the coffin lid shut after a Double Foot Stomp to the back of Mil’s head.

THIS IS LU! 94/100 (A)

Show Rating: 86/100 (B+) One of the best episodes so far? It’s close to the Aztec Warfare episode for me. Enjoyed everything. Bravo!

SEASON 1, EPISODE 20 (THE ART OF WAR)

It is Sunday for me, and I spent the majority of my free time writing drafts for my upcoming TEW 2020 diary. Great progress has been made, and I’m really eager to write more and more. After hours of brainstorming I can reward myself with one episode of LU.

I would gladly watch more, but I’m out of time. This episode promises to be amazing, as we have a stacked card. Puma vs. Cage in a Street Fight is a match I want to see again. We also have a AAA Mega Championship title match. Texano meets Patron in a Bullrope match. But now, some progrression on the Angelico/Ivelisse/Son of Havoc story!

Son of Havoc def. Angelico

Well, this was a tremendous opener. The story of the match is Havoc chasing a rare victory, with Ivelisse barking orders and complaining every second. Some really sweet moves here, from standing Shooting Star Presses to a crazy nice Tope Con Hilo over the ring post!

Havoc reverses The Fall of The Angels, and wastes a lot of time on the top turnbuckle. He has a mic, and dumps Ivelisse mid-match! Vamp is losing his shit over this psychology, but Havoc wins after an amazing Shooting Star Press! He’s a face now, people loved the finish. Loved the match, even the finish. 73/100 (B-)

Havoc is celebrating with the boys, Angelico winks at ivelisse, who knocks him out with a kick.

We’re in Dario’s offcie before the show. Cueto just signed Hernandez, and now he won’t be held back by some tag team, plus Konnan had something to do with numbers in his contract. Dario welcomes Hernandez and offers him a handshake.

Dario’s reaction is priceless, pro wrestling is blessed to have such a great actor.

Patron def. Texano (AAA Mega Championship, Bullrope match)

Patron wrestles in a t-shirt and he wears his end on the left arm, if you care. A better match than their first one, and a clean victory for Alberto here. There were some nice spots, such as a Reverse Suplex from the top turnbuckle, a powerbomb through a table by Texano, and finally a cross armbreaker on the ropes. It was a pretty good fight, with ok lenght. No blood, and I had trouble buying Texano as a winner here. Feel like the power of editing was strong here, more cuts than on Texano’s forehead. 68/100 (C+)

Konnan trains Puma some boxing when Hernandez comes in. K-Dawg namedrops LAX and tensions fly between the three. Puma fist bumps with Hernandez, but looks pissed.

The way Melissa announces Cage gives out their real life relationship. Smiles all the way! When a heel steps out in the WWE, female announcers are asked to be timid and careful. I’ve seen it too many times not to believe in it. Face comes out – let me show my Hollywood smile to this camera. Hernandez watching in the front row, Dario has a new belt!! So beautiful. Dario or title? YES.

Puma def. Cage (Lucha Underground championship, Street Fight match)

Good match, but not overly fantastic. Puma is not a known brawler after all… Really expected more, but I can’t complain, as they did enough in 14 minutes. Maybe it’s just me, but the flow of this match was a bit off, as a lot of time was spent looking for weapons.

Cage could have won the title after Weapon X, but decided to knock out Puma like in the match before. No white towel this time, but Hernandez! He distracts Cage, Konnan puts his new metal cane to use and Prince wins after a 720 splash. 79/100 (B)

Puma gets the new belt, he didn’t feel complete as champion before. So far his aura is kinda boyish, but he’s one of the best in-ring performers hands down.

Final Rating: 76/100 (B-) Really solid show, every match gets an Orange Cassidy thumbs up from me.

SEASON 1, EPISODE 21 (UNO! DOS! TRES!)

A week later I’m back to the show. Super excited, because two of my favorites debut in this episode.

Here they are…

Mack and Killshot are in the house, oh yeah. Dario asks how can he help, but those boys ain’t playing. Ryck accuses Cueto of his eye injury, and teases a cigar to they eye of El Jefe, but thinks against it when Dario starts a spiel about the Trios titles. He wants money instead, gets a handful, so do “Not Daddy Mack” and Killshot.

Sergio Arau performs with his band, and he rhymes ‘lucha’ with ‘drucha’. Also we have a huge opening contest – face Johnny Mundo vs. heel Angelico. They were supposed to work a program in season 4, but it wasn’t meant to be.

Johnny Mundo def. Angelico

Wow, this was amazing. They have great chemistry and their styles meshed so well. Angelico has held his own for a long time in the match, and the finish was pretty neat too, as Mundo blocked a Dragonrana and readjusted himself on the fly for Fin Del Mundo. Awesome and underrated match! 79/100

Vamp and Striker talk about how Mundo is in for a LU title shot any minute now, which of course will lead to an eventual turn by the smiling Prince of Parkour.

A FANTASTIC vignette for Black Lotus, well at least music and a red & black colors. She explains to the diary that she was kidnapped by Dragon Azteca (Puma actually) who is now teaching her lucha libre so she can kick Matanza’s ass.

Mundo and Patron exchange some passive agressive comments in the toilet with a stained window. Some seeds are planted for a future confrontation.

Dario talks to Sexy Star backstage, telling her she’s in a Trios tourney with Super Fly and Pentagon Jr. She actually held Mixed tag team titles with Penta in AAA, so good on Dario.

Drago def. Aerostar (2-2)

Match number four between Drago and Aerostar, in TEW their match rating would take a hit for repetitive booking, but it’s Lucha Underground, there’s no such thing here. Aerostar leads 2-2, but gets caught in a tight pinning maneuver. Good, really good match, but the winner is expected and they saved the best thing for match number 5, I hope. Last time I said so, there was a slightly underwhelming LMS match with Cuerno. 66/100

Ivelisse, Son of Havoc and Angelico are informed that they’re a unit now. Their reaction is great.

Ivelisse got dumped by Son of Havoc, which is pretty emabarassing. “I’m the one who does the dumping!” Ivelisse then storms out and Havoc clarifies that HE dumped her.

Big Ryck, Killshot and The Mack def. Pentagon Jr, Sexy Star and Super Fly

So Penta beat Super Fly to pick up his first win, and now they’re tagging together. Sexy may not be your fav luchadora, but damn her black robe looks cool. Not as cool as Big Ryck though, puffing so hard Mack and Killshot come out of the fog. Kidding.

Penta mocks his partners and the story is simple – he doesn’t need them, and they don’t want his help either after that. Mack gets his minutes to shine, and so does Killshot. Lots of puns from Striker, who jokes about the caliber, the ballistics and then weaves a “swerve” word in there. Striker also asked how is trios style different from 6 man tag? Vamp says that basically CMLL had too many guys on the contract, so that was the only chance to feature talent. Lucha libre history for you, folks.

One of the best moments of the match in my opinion. The way Penta yeets Sexy is great, people did not expect that height. In the end Killshot Double Stomps Super Fly and gets the W for Ryack and his charming cousin. The match wasn’t bad, but slow in some parts. Would be more fitting for a 2nd match spot imo. 60/100

After the match Penta tries to break Fly’s arm, but Sexy intervenes.

Final Rating: 71/100 (B-) Solid episode, two good debuts, legendary trio is formed, Mundo has another great match.

SEASON 1, EPISODE 22 (MASK VS. MASK)

Gotta admit, the title intrigues me. But I’m also salivating for the opener.

Cueto is “beating around the bush” when talking to Konnan and the ever-silent Puma. When confronted, he says that Puma will defend his title against Cuerno tonight. Also more talk about the Trios titles, as Dario encourages Puma to find two guys.

Ivelisse, Angelico and Son of Havoc def. Drago, Fenix, Aerostar

This was a fun bout. Ivelisse kept spamming DDTs, nobody from the love triangle team gave away tags, they were all stolen. Same could be said about Aerostar and Drago who are sick of each other, and slap back to get into the match ahead. Fenix tried to play a peacemaker, no luck. He’s still donning those hot pink pants, he’s so confident in himself. There was one GIFable moment (well, a lot more than one) I wanted to highlight.

I appreciate the balls on Aerostar to even attempt that move. Then Drago broke it up to get the cover himself… what a SNEK. Son of Havoc wins the match with his picture perfect Shooting Star Press, two wins in a row for him! Ivelisse refused to end the match, walking up the stairs. The only tag team that has no inner conflict right now is Mack/Killshot/Ryck. Also it’s cool that Fenix/Aerostar/Drago will compete as a trio in the future… 72/100

Puma does pull ups, Konnan says he found him a partner – Hernandez. Ugh, you didn’t look too far, did you, Konnan? He says one more due and we’re all set. Mundo steps up and said that Puma has already found one. He wants Puma about Cuerno being a sneaky bastard, they have a cool handshake that makes Konnan mad. Ok, how is Cuerno having a go at the title after losing a cage match to Johnny? And why is Puma always looking like a 3 year kid with his big kind eyes? Say something, champ.

Sexy Star def. Super Fly – Mask vs. Mask

I figured it was this match, but I forgot that it was SO rushed. Basically before the bout Dario came out and said that because they’re so nice friends, they need a reason to fight each other, making this a mask vs. mask match. Just like that… The match was nothing special, and after Sexy caught Fly, the man unmasked and got his arm broken by Pentagon. Tough break! 57/100

Prince Puma def. King Cuerno

Puma is with Johnny and Hernandez, Cuerno has Cage and Texano at his side. That will be a trios match for the next week, but now we have an impromtu title defence. It’s a good match of course, but there was a bit too much distractions, no Suicide Dive by Cuerno, and the first meeting of Puma against The Hunter did not get some well-deserved hype. No set up, so I can’t rate this match too highly. 70/100

Final Rating: 65/100 (C) Middle-of-the-road show for my liking. The trios storyline gets the most attention, and world title match felt almost like a backdrop to the next week’s semi final.

SEASON 1, EPISODE 23 (FIRE IN THE COSMOS)

efore we start, Aerostar is chilling on the roof, looking in the sky. Dario disturbs his peace, giving him a pep talk before match 5. It is for “Unique Opportunity” after all. Last time Fenix started as number 1 in Aztec Warfare after one, if I’m not mistaken… Mil got the last spot too, so it’s worth something.

King Cuerno, Cage and Texano def. Prince Puma, Johnny Mundo and Hernandez

Very nice match, especially for the opener. No stopping from these six men, and only Cage wasn’t lucky enough to get his shit in, if you get the reference. Texano swinged the momentum by blasting both Johnny and Puma with a fist wrapped by a “sandpaper snake”. Good showing for Hernandez, he’s a cool doofus. Two heel teams in the trios tournament finals. By the way, Cuerno pins Puma in the middle of the ring with a Thrill of The Hunt! Now he deserves a shot… but it’s too late now. 77/100

Dario says he wants a preview of the next week, so he wants the winners to delegate a guy to fight right now. AHHH, that’s why Cage had so little to do in the first match. Also joining him is Mack and Son Of Havoc, guys who will hold trios gold together in the future.

Cage def. Son of Havoc and The Mack

Really good, but not long enough to be something truly amazing. They can go for half an hour non-stop, but this set of tapings is a bit different, where people are doing 2-3 matches in one night. I liked the bout though, and Cage picked up a victory. It’s two ina row for him, and he stalls Havoc’s moment a too, denying him three Ws in a row. BTW, Daivari is watching this episode from the front row. Don’t remember him, frankly. 64/100

Dario and Drago meet in the toilets once again. Cueto is shit-talking to get the fire under Drago’s tail, the same way he did with Aerostar. I have also caught that Dario does not wash his hands after having a pee. Bad El Jefe…

A really quick segment where Pentagon whispers smth in Melissa’s ear. He would like to announce the next sacrifice… as Melissa steps out, penta grabs her and tries to break her arm, but Sexy Star again saves the day. Vamp stood up, but did nothing. Sexy says that Penta stepped over the line, and that she’s not afraid of him. Dario says that Melissa is a bit shake up, so he’ll do the favors. The way he announces Aerostar is so hilarious, while he showcases his acting range. Dario can do comedy, he can be a weasel, he can be cool. So talented!

Drago def. Aerostar (3-2)

So Dario remained ringside to watch the match, perhaps for the first time ever. The match was good, Aerostar never fails to impress and he’s one of the more innovative luchadores I’ve ever seen. Drago is cool in his own special way, of course. And he learns from his loss to Cuerno by picking up a win here, with his signature pinning maneuver. The highlight of the bout was undoubtedly the splash through the table. Overall, I expected a bit more from match 5. There’s a certain theme with Drago now, eh? Maybe it’s just me. 75/100

Cueto congratulates Drago and tells him that he’s won the chance against Puma for the title. But if he loses – he will be banned from Dario’s Temple forever. Oh shucks…

Final Rating: 72/100 (B-) Another solid episode, but it lacked some oomph. Yes, I’m super spoiled, but how can you not be with Lucha Underground?

SEASON 1, EPISODE 24 (TRIOS CHAMPIONS)

We are more than half way thorugh, and it’s time to crown the inaguaral Trios champions!

The show begins with Black Lotus talking to her diary. She’s been training lucha libre for 8 weeks now, but Boomer Azteca says she’s not ready. He then sends her a bunch of thugs to throw. They are real polite, waiting for their turns to receive moves, none of which are used in lucha libre. Lotus is kinda out of breath and Dragon says uh-uh, no breathers. They exchange hammerlocks and the trainer says that she’s not ready. She hates it… Ok angle, I dig it.

The Trios titles are resting on the desk of Vamp and Matt. The first match is Sexy Star vs. Penta, who tried to break Melissa’s arm last week.

Sexy Star def. Pentagon Jr.

Penta doesn’t hold back, and his leg kicks look even more brutal against someone like Sexy. She holds her own, surviving some big moves. Not a bad luchadora, even though her personality is far from being decent. They go for a respectable amount of time, and Sexy wins with a Lungblower outta nowhere. Not bad, but not good either. Melissa marks out for Sexy’s win. 53/100

Patron busts Johnny’s ball about the elusive brass ring, acting like a total jerk. He’s a face, mind you.

Son of Havoc, Ivelisse, Angelico def. Texano, Cage, Cuerno and Ryck, Mack, Killshot

Striker mentions that SoH, Ivelisse and Angelico put the “fun” in “disfunctional”, and I couldn’t agree more. It is somewhat of a triple threat with all three teams represented at the same time, but they can only tag their own partners.

Gotta say, Cuerno and Texano have some good chemistry teaming together. Also enjoyed the tons of beef between Cage and Ryck. Ivelisse somehow managed to get an injury while giving Cuerno a Seated Senton. Texano falls on Daivari, who loses his shit and starts beating on the cowboy. Killshot then quickly eliminated the dude.

“Long Legz” Angelico eats all of the damage in this fight, but finds a way to Crucify Killshot. Man, that would be a dope solo feud. And just like that, we have the new champs! Or not…

Dario comes out and says that there’s still one team in it, and now it will be a No DQ. It’s The Crew.

Son of Havoc, Ivelissse, Angelico def. The Crew

So the match is a punch-kick mess, lots of brawling and choking. Until the moment is right to make THE Jump.

A star-making maneuver. Ivelisse lays out the dudes with a kendo stick and we get a Double Foot Stomp – Shooting Star Press finish to the match, and a double 3-count. This was awesome indeed. I will rate both matches as one, because it is such a unique situation. For the drama, the heart, the effort, and for THAT jump. 80/100

Final Rating: Angelico was the MVP of the show, no doubt. In 2020 people may not appreciate him, but here he is a star and one of my favorites. But I like almost everyone, almost. Very good TV episode, something different. 74/100 (B-)

SEASON 1, EPISODE 25 (THE WAY OF THE DRAGO)

Quick recap of our new Trios champions and Drago winning the best of five. Dario verbally berates The Crew and introduces them to his brother Matanza for extra motivation. He casts a big shadow, this Matanza.

Fenix def. Killshot

What a bout name-wise! Killshot’s debut singles match is good, but they didn’t go balls to the wall here. Perfect for a night opener, the winner is right too. Can’t rate it too high because it could have been crazier, plus nothing at stake. Fenix is in the limbo right now, after trapping Mil in a casket. Love Killshot’s mask shape, reminds me of MF DOOM. 73/100

Dario and Drago meet in the toilet once more. Some pep talk, Cueto wants a thank you, but Drago just shows him his tongue. Classy.

Cuerno/Hernandez/Cage graphic is followed by Dario coming up to Puma, to remind him that warriors don’t think about the feelings of other men, they only care about victory. I like that Cueto works his tongue to fire up the fighters before an important match. Dario bumps into Hernandez who’s not happy about being put in a three-way. Cueto says the winner will be the new number one contender… Hernandez likes the way Dario thinks, Puma overheard it all. At the end, Dario claps to himself and leaves.

Famous B vs. Vinny Massaro vs. Ricky Mandel vs. Argentis

All men here got their arms broken by Pentagon, but now Texano runs in and throws everyone out of the ring. No contest a few seconds into the match… 5/100

Texano wants a fight after what happened last night (he got attacked by Daivari), people cheer somewhat. I’m not impressed.

Oh… Marty is here! Didn’t see him with a clean hairdo since forever.

He introduces himself as Marty “The Moth” Martinez and asks Dario Cueto to make him a part of the show! Cueto takes him for a crazy fan, and says he would be crushed like a… moth. Btw, Marty marked out about Puma and said that he was camping around The Temple for a week. Not enough for Dario, who closes the gates.

Hernandez def. King Cuerno and Cage

So Hernandez cost both Cuerno and Cage in their respective title matches. I always liked Hernandez in the ring, and found that he shines in multi-man matches a lot. He’s also amazing here, and Cage/Cuerno fighting for the pinfall also adds to the story. Near the end of the match Marty runs in and gets his bacon smacked around by all three. In the end, Hernandez pins Cuerno to become the number one contender in his first singles match. Short, but sweet. 69/100

Vamp interviews the disFUNctional trios champs, and they are still bickering. Ivelisse says she’s the team captain, Son of Havoc disagress, he pulled them to the final. Angelico says he WON them the final after a death-defying move. Ivelisse is not impressed, saying that was a crossbody. THE Crossbody – Angelico says. Awesome skit, I liked it.

Prince Puma def. Drago (Puma’s Title vs. Drago’s Career)

This is a very good lucha libre match, as expected. Too much talks about Konnan for my liking, and a dirty finish of the bout that was motivated by storyline did not make it favors though. Number one contender Hernandez looked like he was about to bump into one of the luchadores, and Puma ducked last second. K-Dawg yelled to Puma that this is his chance, and the champ reluctantly put Drago away. 73/100

Thanks to Drago from the fans. He hobbles to the exit and tells Dario that they will meet again before going up in flames.

Show Rating: 72/100 (B-) Solid effort, a couple of nice matches. The only ‘miss’ of the show was a jobber 4-way. Shame about Drago, but he will be back soon.

SEASON 1, EPISODE 26 (THE BEST IN THE BUSINESS)

The show starts with a skit in Dario’s office. Johnny Mundo and Alberto El patron are not happy that Hernandez gets a shot before them. Dario calls them the best in the biz, and agrees. Therefore he books them in a singles match, and the winner will face Hernandez in a new number one contender match. Massive main event name-wise!

Cisco and Cortez def. Son of Havoc and Angelico

Ivelisse is on crutches, so this is a basic tag team match. After seeing Matanza, the Crew is fired up. The champs are still not on the same page however, also they look good here, flying in and out of the ring. Shatter Machine-like maneuver puts SoH away, they can’t do anything without Ivelisse smh. 65/100

Daivari is in Dario’s office, but he’s focused on his phone, and that disgusts El Jefe. It takes a lot of huevos to come back to The Temple when Texano calls you out. Daivari not interested in talks, he gets a match and says that he likes to inflict pain.

Puma and Hernandez are two seconds away from fighting backstage, so Konnan has to hold them back. Dario is here too, saying that he put them in a tag match against Cuerno and Cage. Hernandez not too happy, he thought that he’s already a number one contender.

Delavar Daivari def. Texano by DQ

Daivari is apparently a big shot, his family has a lot of real estate in the area. Texano is a blue collar boy, so he jumps the man, scaring Melissa who dropped an “oh shit” before the match. Once again Texano throws out a match in a few seconds. 6/100

King Cuerno and Cage def. Prince Puma and Hernandez

Man, I love Hernandez’s moveset. The blend of power moves and that plancha he does, so good to see him. Of course Puma’s planchas are the best, but there’s also Cuerno and his Suicide Dive. All four men shine here, and Hernadez turns on Puma to gift heels, and the only normally working tandem, a victory. Pulled him for the Arrow from Hell, Border Tossed Puma on the apron, and then Cage added a Weapon X. 79/100

Black Lotus is packing her bags, but Dragon Azteca tells her she can only leave if she takes him down. Cheeky! Lotus tries to punch Dragon, but fails… so much training for nothing? Well, she’s leaving anyway, but Azteca offers her to stay.

Alberto El Patron def. Johnny Mundo

Well, this was a good, maybe even great main event. Mundo is amazing, but Patron had to prove himself here. He actually attempted a Moonsault and did a Suicide Dive after Johnny broke the stairs accidentally. A very snug and fine bout, with both men getting moments to shine. Patron survived The End of the World by grabbing the rope, Johnny survived the Cross Armbreaker the same way. Finally Alberto hit Johnny’s lights out and pinned him. Really good bout, but Patron’s shoulders were also on the mat when he pinned Mundo. I don’t remember if this will play into the story. 81/100

At the ned of the show Catrina tells us that Mil Muertes can not die, and every death is the biginning of new life for him. Rise again, Pasqual Mendoza! HE’S ALIVE!!!!

Show Rating: 81/100 (B) Really good episode, two great matches, and Catrina/Mil are back. Awesome!

SEASON 1, EPISODE 27 (ANCIENT MEDALLIONS)

Dario visits Matanza with a red sack of Aztec Medallions belonging to each the seven tribes. Dario bought them, and they cost a lot… “Once united, they will make one warrior as powerful as the Gods themselves, maybe even more powerful!” Interesting. Lovely bit for LU historians right here.

Aerostar def. Jack Evans

Aerostar lost the best of 5 series, but he’s still in The Temple, and he cheezes a smile because of it. His opponent is the man, the myth, the legend… Jack Evans! He comes in on his hands, and talks so much trash that fans boo him two minutes into the bout. Jack is stupidly agile and athletic, everything he does is so flashy. Vampiro loves him too, saying Evans is a real deal. No doubt about it, as this is an amzing opening contest. Some innovative moves here, and the finish is BRUTAL, BRUTAL, BRUTAL! 78/100

Evans is a great singles guy too, would love to see much more from him in the near future.

Mack oversees his cuz Big Ryck counting green, and says smth like “c’mon, we’re family.” Big Ryck says being a family didn’t get them the Trios titles. Ryck criticizes Mack for doing his fancy moves and looking good in front of the fans, and says the only thing that matters is ‘making money while you can’. Mack is puzzled, he’s so pure.

Dario called in 7 wrestlers for his announcement. They will now battle for one of the Medallions!

Fenix def. Cage, Sexy Star, Pentagon, Killshot, Mack, Cuerno

Damn, what a great line up this is. So much talent bottled up in the ring! I swear, everytime LU fielded a multi-man match this season, we got fireworks! Ultra amazing bout, where everyone got the time to get their awesome shit in. I’m in love with this promotion for matches like this. Non-stop craziness, lots of intervened storylines here too. Fenix/Penta, Penta/Killshot, Cuerno/Killshot, Cage/Mack, Cage/Fenix and so many more salivating exchnages! Mack and Killshot vs. Cuerno and Cage is also a great subplot. Fenix wins the match by pinning Penta, once again! 88/100

Simply amazing show so far. Fenix gets the first Medallion, we still have a main event. Trios champs find out that soon they will defend their titles against The Crew… in a LADDER MATCH! Yeah, ivelisse has an injury, so Dario proposes them to vacate the titles, but they refuse. Man, love this show and Dario.

Fenix ties up his boots after the win, when he is visited by Catrina, who says he is just a pawn, and that he played into her hands by making Mil even stronger. Fenix tries to touch the woman, but she disappears. Instead, The Disciples of Death jump off the lockers and we cut away. Spooky!

Hernandez def. Alberto El Patron

Well, this match wouldn’t outod what we have seen here tonight, but it played up to the main story very nicely. The match was really nothing special, but then Johnny appeared and Alberto escaped from him through the window like a coward!

Dario’s reaction is priceless. The bump is cool as heck, the heelturn is perfect. Johnny channeling his inner Shawn Michaels? Oh yeah. Somehow this is not a DQ, so Mundo throws Patron in the ring for Hernandez to get an easy win. What a moment! 71/100

Patron is aided by the medics, people chant ‘culero’ at Johnny and Hernandez.

Show Rating: 86/100 (B+) One of the best shows so far, I enjoyed it a lot. A lot of talent booked, stories progressing nicely, LU is on the roll!

SEASON 1, EPISODE 28 (SHOOTS AND LADDERS)

I never had a chance to say how cool it is that LU recaps the important moments in a quick episode preview. Puma/Hernandez, Trios title, Texano/Daivari storylines all got some shine.

Striker tries to make LU with his fingers, how cute.

High resolution, because this blog acts weird sometimes. Anyway, there will be a ladder match in the main event, and I can bet that Angelico jumps off the office once again.

Marty somehow got himself hired (probably bought his place on the roster) and he creeps on Melissa. She’s a trooper. Puma is too, and wth, that is a lavish debut to have if you’re The Moth.

Prince Puma def. Marty “The Moth” Martinez

Marty wants a commemorative photo before the match, but then lays out the champ with a lariat. He dominates for a minute or two, but falls to a 630 Splash. Eh, not really a squash. 51/100

After the bout Hernandez stands on top of the stairs. Konnan says that he treated Hernandez like his boy, but he is just a sorry son of a bitch. Konnan invites him to the ring to try Puma right now, but Hernandez thinks against that. CULERO… I don’t know why he thought against it, Puma wasn’t the freshest, plus he’s much smaller. You’re better than that, Hernie.

Vampiro has a sit-down interview with Johnny and asks him why did he throw Alberto through the window. Mundo starts of a bit mellow, so Vamp tries to instigate the hatred between the two with his shithousery. Johnny is a good ‘brash and cocky’ character, but he never played someone super violent. I enjoyed the interview, Mundo ends it with his new signature line ‘this is my world… but you already knew that’ *winks in perro*…

Cueto tells The Crew about their upcoming match, also mentioning the sacrifices made to the Aztec Gods. He wants them to sacrifice the champs, or else, they will be sacrificed themselves… Strong ‘Beebop & Rocksteady’ vibe from this faction.

Texano def. Daivari by DQ

Well, this is not the drizzling shits, this is worse. It’s the most boring and routine match ever that drags on until Big Ryck attacks Texano for money reasons. I understand that Daivari is this suave kind of guy, and Texano is a blue collar boy, but God, Texano is not a babyface in my eyes. Let him beat the heck out of somebody. Two minutes ago he was jobbing to Patron and fighting with Cage and Cuerno, and now he’s a face? Thumbs down. 12/100

Catrina creeps up to Dario and tries to snatch his key, then tells him to book a Death match between Mil and Fenix. Catrina disappears and El Jefe bites his fist with an expression I can not describe.

This screenshot has some serious meme potential.

Black Lotus has escaped the training dungeon, she drags the bags somewhere. Meanwhile Chavo steps into Azteca’s household and tells him ‘if you don’t want her to die, you gonna need my help’. Well, I don’t remember this AT ALL. It’s like I watch it for the first time. They drink some, Chavo says Guerreros, Azteca’s Tribe (Eagles) and Cuetos have a rich, bloody history. Chavito offers protection to Lotus if Azteca makes the call to stop the Mexico coming after Guerreros. Dragon says ok, but protect her with your life.

Angelico, Ivelisse and Son of Havoc def. The Crew in a Ladder match

Well, this is not a typical wrestling match. It’s just a fight, sometimes very messy and unpolished, just like the rusty ladders. Lots of brawling and some unintentional comedy, like when Angelico got his head thrown into the wooden board and they fell off, or when Angelico tilted the ladders so Cisco’s ass fell through the window to Dario. The thing that was legitemately funny is Cisco jumping back in and Vampiro screaming “FLYING SUSHI ROLL!” like wtf. Son of Havoc botched the SSP, and Angelico had to risk his life once again to prevent the worst from happening.

This is even better than THE crossbody in my opinion. Angelico is a crazy man, taking hellacious bumps without fear. Ivelisse that didn’t fight at all then climbed the ladder, bit Cisco’s hand and unhooked one title of the three ala Jack Swagger. This wasn’t perfect, but damn it was fun. Cisco’s ass about to be eaten by Matanza. 74/100

Show Rating: 67/100 (C+) Wrestling-wise this wasn’t good at all, but I’m still entertained with most stories. Chavo, Texano, Daivari, and to some extent The Moth are not something I would die to watch in season 1. Give us more Pentagon, come on…

SEASON 1, EPISODE 29 (FIGHT TO THE DEATH)

Chavo stops Black Lotus before she gets into The Temple, telling her to get her revenge in front of the whole world, also saying that Guerreros hate Cuetos a lot. Huh, I wouldn’t guess that…

Johnny Mundo def. Aerostar

On paper, this had the promise to be an insane high flying match with lots of innovative moves, but in reality, Johnny spent most of the match stomping and punching on the Aerostar. I get it, he’s a heel now, but I expected more. Can’t rate this match super highly, as the winner was never iin doubt. 63/100

Vamp interviews Sexy Star ahead of her submission match with pentagon, asks her about Super Fly. Sexy says she’s not afraid of the bully Pentagon, and that she didn’t talk to Fly yet, altough they are still friends. She knows submission holds he doesn’t so she feels confident.

Prince Puma def. Hernandez

They have some great chemistry, dare I say. I think they have some of the best move sets in the whole company, and in different styles of course. Hernandez is good, but is he a main eventer? His attitude and lack of evident mic skills probably hold him back, but apart from that, he’s a badass in my book. Puma is one of the best in LU, that goes without saying. Actually, Puma cheated mid match, bashing a chair to The Flying’s SuperMex’s skull, weird from a total babyface champ. A very fun bout anyway! 81/100

Double main event night it is so, Death Match is coming. And it’s scheduled for one fall… lol, somehwat funny.

Mil Muertes def. Fenix – Death Match

What a great return for Pasqual Mendoza. He now wears black pants instead of blue ones and kicks even more ass than before. He looks like a total beast, and is followed by three skeletons with sixpacs and an extra vivacious Catrina. The match is quick and brutal, Muertes just TWATTERS Fenix with chairshots to the head. Then powerbombs him through the office #2! Now that’s how you make a statement. The show takes a break, and when it’s back on, The Disciples just carry Fenix to the ring, he eats a Flatliner and that’s it. Would like it to be a bit longer, but Mil had to look dominant. An extra saltry lick to end the show… This is THE storyline. 84/100

Right before the end The Crew sacrifice Bael to Matanza. Brutal death actually… “Yes, sir!”

Show Rating: 80/100 (B) When Mundo, Mil, Fenix, Puma all have singles matches on the show, you know it’s a treat. Top to bottom, this was great!

SEASON 1, EPISODE 30 (SUBMIT TO THE MASTER)

Been a week or two since I watched Lucha Underground, and I’m very excited to get back at it. Writing this every time, so you know this TV show is great.

Chavo is in Dario’s office. Cueto said what he did, and now warns El Jefe that Black Lotus is coming here to kill him, and she was trained by you know who. Dario knows who is Dragon Azteca, tells that Chavo had to get to her first, and finds out about Chavo’s talks with him. Chavo thinks Dragon Azteca has an insider here and wants protection from Mexico, which Dario agrees too. They keep talking…

Jack Evans def. Argentis

Jack is awesome, even Vampiro hypes him up a lot. He has some unique moves for sure, but his trash talking makes him stand out here. Argentis is not bad, but as Dario said before the match – nothing special. The bout was for one of the medallions actually, and in a decent match Evans prevails with a tricky pin. 63/100

Daivari tells Ryck that he got them a trios title match, but they have to find the third man. Ryck suggests cuz Mack, but Cage interrupts. Daivari asks what makes Cage the best candidate, so he quickly lays out Mack, turning him face. Daivari is stoked and tells Ryck to leave the sibling. Ryck and Cage have some serious beef between them, in more ways than one.

Black Lotus is in the locker room, when Chavo tells her about the plan to free Matanza so she could kill him. He then tries to sneak attack her, but she kicks his ass. Chavo calls for a now Bael-less Crew. Eventually he hits Lotus from the back, and unveils handcuffs.

Son of Havoc, Angelico, Ivelisse def. Cage, Daivari, Ryck

Ryck smokes, and Daivari drinks, so that’s a team. Angelico and Son of Havoc slap each other in the backs to steal a tag, Ivelisse is so upset by this that she takes a seat among the fans. Impressive power spot by Ryck and Cage, who each held Angelico upside down with Delayed Suplexes. It is hard to pass Long Legz TM like that, so props to them. Ivelisse didn’t get tagged in once, and faces win after blue pants Texano attacks Daivari. Shooting Star Press, and another title defence in a quite limited match. 53/100

The Crew leads gagged Black Lotus to Dario, who now plans to sit her across Matanza. Very short, Dario and Chavo are pretty good actors.

Pentagon def. Sexy Star – Submission match

In kayfabe Penta is hated by everybody, and Sexy is loved by everybody, which is completely vica versa in real life. Penta comes out in a Perros Del Mal shirt, interesting. Sexy has a nice black robe, and I admire her abs. Anyway, the match is kinda slow which is fine for the submission type of match. Sexy not known for her submission game, and Penta also is not the all out man of 1000 holds. There are a few interesting submissions though…

Damn, that’s sexy! Ok, some superkicks later Star hits a crossbody on the outside, people love it. Hurts a bit to see Pentagon selling flimsy looking holds, but Super Fly comes out and attacks Sexy to give Pentagon an easy win via Surfboard submission hold. 58/100

Post match Penta prepares to break Sexy’s arm, but Vamp runs out for the help and shoves the rudo away. People loudly chant for Vampiro, but he decides to walk away… for now. He reflects on this in the toilet, bashing the mirror on the wall with his head. No blood spilled, but what a great visual!

Many people are not fond of Vampiro, but I low key dig him. Plus I’m forever grateful to him for pushing an idea to work with Pentagon. Without Vamp, LU wouldn’t have one of it’s biggest stars.

Show Rating: 61/100 (C) Not the best in-ring action this time, but I love to see something happening in the Black Lotus story, and excited to see how Vamp/Penta unravels.

SEASON 1, EPISODE 31 (THE DESOLATION OF THE DRAGO)

Not bad of a start for the episode, Drago jumps off the roof of The Temple. In reality he would break legs for sure, but hey, it’s Lucha Underground.

Vampiro interrupts Striker to talk about himself… getting in the ring last night. I’m just an announcer, my dudes. Sorry I got my emotions take over. Matt doesn’t seem to mind, and it would be funny if some fan would be offended by Vamp jumping off his seat. He does that every time someone takes a bad bump in AAA!

Dario announces ULTIMA LUCHA! Says he wants biggest matches possible, and tonight we will start to line up this once in a lifetime event. Who’s gonna challenge for the main title? Dario throws out a bunch of names Puma has already defeated, then he gives Blue Demon Jr. a cue to come out. The lucha libre legend would be a great addition to the event, but Dario suspects he has some ring rust, so he puts him in a match against ugh Chavo. Not that “ugh” from the team though, and he’s with Cisco and Cortez. Dario makes them fight right now, and it’s ANYTHING GOES.

Chavo Guerrero Jr. def. Blue Demon Jr.

Effectively a 3 on 1 match, where Chavito used a kendo stick and punched Demon around. Cisco and Cortez hold down the legend so Chavo can get his win back after a Frog Splash. Chavo gets some heat, but I’m not sure it’s not X-Pac kind of heat. 38/100

Right after the match Chavo visits Black Lotus in her cage. She calls him a liar, he says he’s a Guerrero, duh. He hopes that she likes her view, reffering to Matanza. Is he sleeping or something? Actually, just recently found out that Matanza was supposed to debut in episode 9 (First Aztec Warfare) but some visa issues prevented it. How different would The Temple be in that case?

Dario is once again tasting his piss in the toilet, when he sees Drago in the mirror ala Hogan sees Warrior. Actually no, but that doesn’t matter. Drago scares Dario and says that he also fought Puma for the title, which makes him eligible for the raffle to main event Ultima Lucha. Dario says that he’s bacnished, but Drago roars LET ME FIGHT!! Dario says ok, you found a loophole, but for me to reinstate you, you have to win, or else you will aslo lose your mask. Drago says deal, his English is not very good.

The Disciples of Death def. Bengala, Mascarita Sagrada and Pimpinella Escarlata

Looks like Pimpi and Mascarita recovered after The Crew took them out all that time ago. Bengala debuts in a weird spot imo, and Catrina’s skeletons that sap the electricity with their slow walks are not booked to lose, you know. Pimpi starts off with signature harassment spots, Catrina not having it.

Bengala is actually awesome, and I enjoyed his time in the ring a lot. Mascarita handspringed into the ring to eat a Small Boot, funny. These skeletons are already booked to be a joke, they are not imposing at all, looking like limp cannon fodder. Some cool spot from the skeletons, and sheesh, Catrina licks Pimpinella, like for real. Cool finisher from the death dudes, and one of them sits up like a slav on the chest of the exotico. 48/100

Johnny is back, and he wears a tacky red shirt. He asks why the heck he’s not in the contendership raffle, he’s clearly the best man for this. Dario says Johnny can be champion come Ultima Lucha, and wants him to unleash hell on Puma. “You gave me a black eye, big deal, I look great in sunglasses!” is kinda on brand. Dario proposes an All Night Long match. One match for the whole show, whoever has the most pinfalls by the end is the new champ. “You may be the best boss that I ever had” says Mundo and shakes Dario’s hand. Awesome little segment, Johnny as a heel is great.

Drago def. Cuerno, Hernadez, Cage

How freaking cool does Drago look? Awesome entrance and a darker attire, Vamp must be pissing his pants in excitement. He has some bad blood with Hernie, as he cost him his career for two-three weeks. Cage also has unsettled biz with Hernie and works well with Cuerno. It is played up how they have teamed together, but this is for the bigger opportunity. Killshot is looking on from the balcony, and at one point Cuerno sends him an air arrow. Drago capitalizes and sprays Yellowish Mist in the face of the hunter, and pins him with a signature rollover. Last Man Standing match revenge? Quite possibly. Drago is reinstated! 74/100

Puma comes out to pose with Drago, El Jefe looks on from his place. He turns around and sees Catrina sitting in his chair. She says he made a big mistake not putting Mil in that match. Well, he never faced Puma. Catrina says that’s exactly why he’s still champion. Dario tries to say something back, but gets choked by the key tassle, pretty tight too, his eyes get red. Catrina chokes him until Dario says ok, Drago vs Muertes it is, winner meets the champion at Ultima Lucha. Awesome, and Catrina is getting better in her role.

Show Rating: 67/100 (C+) A better effort than they had last week, this was a Drago-centric show and it was fine. Enjoyed all Dario skits and Catrina’s performance.

SEASON 1 EPISODE 31 (ALL NIGHT LONG)

Recap of Johnny and patron talking. HOLY SHIT I just now realized that Johnny’s line “I’m not some guy in the catering you can slap around” is a dig at some racist WWE guy. I can be very slow.

One match, one show, ALL NIGHT LONG!! Match #100, by the way. Wouldn’t know that if it wasn’t for my match rating sheet.

First of all, we have a PP (lol) and JM graphic with a slightly uncentered zeroes in the square. Why not make it Puma and Mundo? Anyway, this is one of those matches you need to just sit back and enjoy, forget about play by play and just DRINK IT IN MAAAAAN. Highlights just because.

Puma and Munda start out with splendid chain wrestling, it’s like watching water flow it’s so smooth. After the first break they roll oer the mats and puma takes the first fall. Johnny takes his fall back and makes it 1-1 by blatantly holding on to the rope, Elias is blind. No more Johnny Zero chants now. They now discover some weapons under the ring, Michinoku Driver on some wooden box from Prince, but Mundo lays him out with the crowbar and takes the lead! But it gets much worse, as Johnny scores number 3 with a Moonlight Drive and 4 with Flying Chuck + End of the World! 4-1 already!!

Johnny discovers a bigass ladder to drive into Puma’s skull. Prince recovers when fighting among the fans, Mundo takes a suplex on the seats. There’s a 4 table construction going on in the tunnel, Chekhov’s gun is loaded. Puma sets it up too, then falls off the balcony. Mundo travels from one roof to the other with a ladder and forces the band to play hima song, cause he’s about to become LU champ!! LEGENDARY! Puma slowly crawls up, gets water in his face, but wrestles a plank out of Johnny. BOINK! I laughed out loud, that was so great. Puma smacks a real guitar across Johhny’s head and spears him onto the 4 tables!! HOLY SHITT!!!!

Turning point of the match, Puma has the momentum. He struggles to throw Johnny back, but eventually covers him to make it 4-2. Few minutes later after a slap off on the knees, Puma covers Mundo with a Driver, and it’s 4-3 with less than 10 minutes ago. No timer on the screen, but Johnny knows he needs to kill the time and shows a running master class around the ring. Jumps in and out, hides behind announcers, takes the steps, but… PATRON IS BACK! He wipes out Mundo and the cameraman, sends him down the stairs, hits him with a DDT on the floor and Puma makes it 4-4 with a 450 Splash. Four and a half minutes to go!

Alberto challenges Mundo to a match and says he’s coming for that title, but you already knew that. High octane action, lots of covers, a Standing C4, announcers freak out. Mundo falls with one minute left, Puma gets ready… 720 SPLASH! Cover, one-two-three, 5 seconds left, and Puma retains the title!

Just wow. The best match LU has produced, no question about it. It’s even better than Fenix/Mil, because they have such a storied history together and had more time to show how awesome they are. Instant classic! 3 points off for the musicians stopping their song when Puma joined them. 97/100

Show Rating: 95/100 (A) I might just go for a smoke now, and I’m not a smoker. Enjoyed the match, and it didn’t feel long at all. Huge props to both men, they raised the bar once again. Some very nice and fresh camera angles too, they did a spendid show. Less is more? Oh yeah.

SEASON 1, EPISODE 33 (DEATH VS. DRAGON)

Recap of last week’s show. Tremendous All Night Long match involved Patron’s return, and now they have a match at Ultima Lucha! Huge announcement, the existence of the graphic makes it feel big.

Super Fly def. Sexy Star

Sexy gets a jobber entrance, and she’s back with her tinfoil cape. Fly is now wearing a face paint, unmasking has been stressful for him it seems. Before the match we get an interview with Vamp, Super Fly reveals that he wanted Sexy to experience the same pain he has. Now he’s back and will not fight lightly, also warns Vamp to keep his nose out of it. Meh, he’s not doing it for me and his ‘nice guy but actually a soft bitch that turned bitter’ gimmick. And he has a distracting wet spot on his bum, Jesus. I am not against intergender matches if they are good, but this was basic, cheap and botchy. Fly wins after a simple Powerbomb, what a waste of time. 23/100

After the bell Fly beats Sexy some more and throws her out, so she can rest on some dude’s knee. Next match announced… Moth Tribe where you at?

Short graphic of Drago training with nunchaks to some dubstep. Mmkay… the sunlight made it look good.

So Penta comes out and says he’s not interested in some stupid golden medallion, he wants to impress his master. One pendejo interfered in one of his biggest sacrifices, and it is Vampiro. Penta gets in Vamp’s face, and I have to say, the man can act and totally feels the crowd. He teases reluctancy, but snaps a bit when pushed around. Great acting for my liking, and the crowd is hot for his feud. Penta just walks away before the match even starts, the mad lad.

Aerostar def. Cage, The Mack, Marty The Moth

Cage and Mack slug it out from the start and brawl around the disturbed and disheartened Vampiro. Marty puts the arm on Aerostar’s shoulders like they are best buds, almost gets rolled up. He flies over the top, but Aerostar can do it so much better. Mack and Cage continue fighting among each other, Exploder on the apron and a frog splash to the outside by Mack! Aerostar then puts Marty down after a simple splash. 57/100

Aerostar wins the medallion, good for him. He joins Fenix and Evans in the match, which promises to be crazy good.

Backstage Ivelisse spars with Son of Havoc, doesn’t cover up, bitches as always. Angelico tells them to get on the same page, gets punched in the gut too. Catrina walks in and basically challenges them for a trios match with her electrocuted skeletons. They swiftly take all three down and Catrina leads Mil to the ring for his number one contendership match with Drago. He’s promptly taken out by Hernandez before the match though, whips our dragon with a belt and leaves.

Mil Muertes def. Drago

Pretty dominant performance by Muertes, but not an all out squash. Drago was whipped for a long time, hit some hope spots, but those were quickly brushed off. Flatliner seals the victory for Mil, and the main event at Ultima Lucha. Muertes looks like a biggest threat, and even badder than before. He threw Drago in the chairs and broke them in fury at one point, powerbombed Drago through the unbreakable announce table and speared him twice at least. He’s ready! 64/100

Lick of Death, a kiss to Muertes ad lots of posing for Catrina. Then Puma comes out for some stare down from the top of the staircase, held back by Konnan.

Final Rating: 62/100 (C) Some huge matches announced without Cueto. Mundo/Patron, Puma/Mil + it’s already evident Drago/Hernandez, Cage/Mack, Ive/SoH/Angelico vs. Disciples of Death are on the card. Plus Fenix/Evans/Aerostar and of course Penta/Vamp. Decent show, but not enough great wrestling imo.

SEASON 1, EPISODE 34 (GOLD AND GUERREROS)

Chavo is in Dario’s office, and they talk about their deal. Chavo got The Crew, protection from Mexico, and now it’s time for one more thing… a title match against Prince Puma, No DQ! Chavo wants Dario to neutralize Konnan, and Cueto says if K-Dawg puts his nose in the match, Chavo will automatically become a champion. Eerie smirk, Dario was hiding one of the medallions for the whole exchange.

Texano def. Daivari

A fairly boring match between two polarly opposite figures. “Blue Collar Hero” and “The Golden Warrior” who has Big Ryck at ringside. Near the end Ryck wrapped a bullrope around his fist and tried to punch Texano, but was superkicked. Sitout powerbomb, 1-2-3. I mean, it’s very basic and boring if you compare it to what we usually have. Texano gets his win and hopefully puts an end to this feud. 47/100

Puma pumps some iron backstage (as always) and Konnan is talking about Chavo. Suddenly they ae approached by Catrina, who says that Puma will need all the luck to overcome Mil. Muertes appears too, staring down Puma. Konnan says it’s all just mind games, Puma agrees. After a short break Konnan is talking with someone backstage, telling them to settle a score with Chavo in tonight’s match.

Drago def. Hernandez by DQ

So, Hernandez cost Drago the title, then Drago won the 4-way, and got his chance against Mil, but before that fight he got slapped around by SuperMex. Now they have a regular match, and their styles mesh quite well, as Hernandez always looks great against smaller opponents. His mouth gets busted open and he bullies one plant fan to get the belt from him. He then whips Drago with it and chokes him, prompting a DQ. 52/100

Post match Hernandez gets heat for saying that dragons are not real and basically turns the crowd on himself a bit more. This is all of course a part of the plot, and a building block for a stipulation for the Ultima Lucha show.

Chavo is spooked by Mil and Catrina backstage, who tells Guerrero that if he wins, his celebration will be short-lived. I mean, anyone who watched wrestling for some time knows that Puma will not lose, but ok.

Alberto El Patron def. Marty ‘The Moth” Martinez

Patron sports a new gear and a more aggressive style, kicking the giggles out of Marty and locking him in a Cross Armbreaker for a quick submission victory. Marty stood very close to Melissa before the match, his transition to the full on pervert is already in the motion. 43/100

Post match Alberto thanks Johnny for waking him up with that throw into the glass window. He woke up the evil part of El Patron. An evil, ruthless, sadisitc side of Alberto… doesn’t look good when you know that this guy is a rapist, eh? He is well supported here though, and he says Juanita’s mistake was his last… but you already knew that. WINK.

Prince Puma w/Konnan def. Chavo Guerrero w/The Crew – No DQ

So they had some chain wrestling for about a minute, then Chavo faked an injury and Cisco and Cortez got in to double team the champ. Konnan called in the man from Mexico, who is revealed to be Texano. He quickly lays out Beebop and Rocksteady to Chavo’s Shredder and Prince retains in a storyline match after a 720 Splash. Chavo looks like a total pleb, but perhaps they would justfy it somehow. For a match with Puma, and this stipulation, this was a major let down. 46/100

Chavo touches his hammy in the locker after the match, Blue Demon appears. Chavo starts mocking him for hiring Texano to do his dirty job, but that wasn’t Blue Demon. Still, Chavo gets under his skin, saying that Texano is a bigger star in Mexico and the legend chokes Chavito screaming “I AM MEXICO!”

Show Rating: 53/100 (D+) Really, not a good show. I get that Ultima Lucha is getting closer and closer, and you do not want your key players to get injured, but there were no good matches this episode. Some stories have progressed, some have ended. Too much Chavo for my liking, and a lot of in-ring promos. Like, don’t get me wrong, Chavo is good as a supporting cast, but he’s not a major player after how he has been booked his whole career. His wrestling is good, but there’s like 10-15 guys in that locker room who are better than him in the ring, it’s not 2006 in WWE.

SEASON 1, EPISODE 35 (FUEL TO THE FIRE)

Pentagon is in his dojo, talking to his master. He wants to destroy Ian Hodgkinson at Ultima Lucha, and sacrifice him to maestro. Very cool, nice start here…

The Mack def. Cage

A very fun brawl with plenty of athletic moves here! They picked up the pace and never put the foot off the pedal. Great match, and altough it wasn’t too long, it was very exciting. Mack rolls up Cage to keep this rivalry alive, and dare I say, this will be a slobberknocker at Ultima Lucha! 72/100

Son of Havoc is approached by Catrina in the locker room, tonight Mil is coming after him. That would be a very good match. Ivelisse shows up and tells Catrina “back off… bitch!!” She does, and somehow Ivelisse and Havoc end up in this postion.

That’s when Angelico walks in and says ‘please don’t tell me you are back again, guys’ getting a collective ‘shut up’. Cheesy, but I love this team.

A sit-down interview with Vampiro and Pentagon… Vamp wants to know who is his master. Penta smirks, probably because he himself doesn’t know yet. Well, he’s not very responsive to Vamp, then just calls him a coward. That boils up Vamp’s manhood, he spits out that he has spent 33 years in rings all over the world, but his time is gone, and his daughter is what’s important for him. He also says that he would easily kick Penta’s ass, but he will not. Penta says Vamp was always a coward, and walks away.

Mil Muertes def. Son of Havoc

And another awesome match here! Havoc has the support of the crowd, and they love every minute of this! It’s not a squash at all, but Mil still looks dominant and in control, even when Havoc is in Full Throttle mode. Disciples of Death appear to attack Angelico, and Catrina knocks Ivelisse out with a stone. Sasuke Special wipes out the deck, but then Mil lariats and spears Havoc to set up a winning Flatliner! 76/100

So Texano is in the ring for a promo, saying he might not be a good dude, and he might be a cheater, but he never turns on his nation. He calls out Chavo fo a fight at Ultima Lucha, and he doesn’t care if his leg is broken – he will break his other one… Crew run out to attack the blue collar dude and in slides Blue Demon Jr. for the save, but then he gets a chair from the hired guns and blasts Texano with it. Solid blade job, cowboy! Blue Demon says that Texano is not Mexico, HE IS! Demon is boo-ed, I don’t remember this feud at all, but it didn’t take much to start it, Chavo just had to question Demon’s status and let his insecurities out. Looks like they will fight at Ultima Lucha…

Coming up next is the first ever LU Atomicos match! Team Alberto vs. Team Johnny, that will be fun. There’s also a graphic confirming that Hernandez and Drago will face off once again at Ultima Lucha. No stipulation announced yet, I miss Dario.

Mundo, Evans, Super Fly, Hernandez def Alberto, Drago, Sexy Star and Aerostar

Look, Jack and Johnny are on the same team! Drago and Aerostar are friends again, yay! A very fast paced match with plenty of stories woven into this action packed fight. Alberto ran after Johnny at one point like a dog runs after a postman. Hernandez shines as a big dude in this matches, and his face expressions when he has to stand unimpressed, waiting for high fliers to get their shit in is kinda how young fathers look when they wait for their kids to get off the potty. Patron is booked to be the man in this bout, so he backstabs Hernandez, takes out Fly with a Tilt-a-Whirl Backbreaker and almost gets Jack to tap out, but here’s Johnny and his finisher! Patron rolls out to his feet, like he didn’t just take a big move and after a few seconds Mundo covers Sexy to get the win for the rudos, as expected before a big event. 70/100

Right after this match Pentagon attacks Vampiro from the back!! Huge kick! Pentatgon smacks Vamp with a chair and pours gasoline all over him, then teases a live burning, showing us a lighter. He says that he’s not afraid of Vampirito, but Vampiro is afraid of Penta! If Vampiro does not accept his challenge for Ultima Lucha, then his daughter and all the world will see him burning in flames. Jesus Christ, this is a hot angle, no pun intended. Why Penta, why?

Show Rating: 78/100 (B) Now we are talking! This was a far better show, and it had three very good matches. The first ever Atomicos match, fine bouts between SoH/Mil and Cage/Mack plus the Penta/Vamp confrontation. Muy bien!

SEASON 1 EPISODE 36 (THE BEGINNING OF THE END)

Penta sits in Dario’s office, boss tries to give him one of the medallions. Pentagon doesn’t want any little medallions, he wants to destroy Vampiro to prove to his master that he’s ready. If his master wanted those medallions, he would break El Jefe’s arm and take them all. That was a badass line. Tonigth Penta will push Vamp to his limit and make him accept his challenge… Nice segment.

Bengala def. Daivari

I rooted for Bengala here, he’s awesome and I would like to see more of him. “The Coolest Cat In the Temple” has plenty to show here, and wins even though Big Ryck likes to get involved. Daivari is a decent heel, but he really isn’t worth pushing. Bengala wins with a Bridging German and gets the 4th Aztec Medallion. By the way, Vamp is not selling a beating by Pentagon, which is especially weird when we know that those shows are taped together. Maybe I’m wrong, and this show was filmed earlier, but still, Vamp is too happy here. 52/100

And after the break Vamp is standing in the ring with a a mic, addressing the issue he has with Pentagon. Just as he spills his guts to the fans, Penta comes out and tells him to stop crying, and basically verbally bullies the man, laughing at his real name. “Ian Hodgkinson is not the man who will fight you at Ultima Lucha… because the man that will kick your ass is VA-MPI-RO!” Vamp chokeslams Penta and gets embrased by the rabid fans. Tell anything you want about Vampiro, but he can connect with the crowd.

King Cuerno def. Killshot

Holy shit, this is kind of my dream match. Cuerno has fallen off the radar lately, and now he’s back. Killshot is one of my favorites, and he gets a chance to shine here. They have some good chemistry, and could definetly go for another five-ten minutes. Brutal looking slam on the apron from King!

Cuerno also debuts a new bow and arrow like submission hold that gets him the victory and an Aztec medallion! This was good, but rather short. 71/100

Sexy Star def. Super Fly

This match ends very fast with a sudden submission victory by Sexy Star. She busted out Mistico’s finisher, La Mística (Tilt–a–whirl headscissors transitioned into a single arm takedown floated over into a Fujiwara armbar). Stole it from wikia… 16/100

After the beating of Super Fly, Marty “The Moth” shows up to check what medallion Sexy just won. Huh, just like he thought… a MOTH! He figures out that since he represents this tribe, he should get a chance to fight for it. Right now! Sexy nods.

Sexy Star def. Marty “The Moth”

Well, that’s another short match to boost Sexy’s momentum. She missed a lot of weeks due to her leg injury, but now she’s back in business. Marty is yet to win a match, and perhaps this battle acts as a teaset for their upcoming feud. 21/100

And to close the show, we have a stare down between Mil Muertes and Puma. Of course it comes to blows, after Dario can’t control Catrina and her skeletons. They gang attack Puma, who’s saved by Konann for a bit. His deadly metal cane works against the disciples, but Mil grabs it from him and smacks him in the ribs! Puma knocked out too, Catrina drives the stone into K-Dawgs head. The disciples have rolled out a casket too, so he goes there. Mil FLATLINES Puma with authority, not a bad angle to advance this story.

Show Rating: 63/100 (C) Normal show before the BIG BANG. Killshot/Cuerno really belonged in the main event spot, and deserved more time. The final segment was good, and we’re ready for the go-home show!

SEASON 1, EPISODE 37 (PENULTIMA LUCHA)

So, the biggest event of the year is closing in, and the card is almost finalized. Big Ryck is smoking in Dario’s face, and he lets his tongue slip multiple times, saying that Ryck was blinded by money, he has lost focus, and they do nt see eye to eye. Dario wants to rebuild their alliance, and asks what Ryck wants more… power or money? Why not both? Ryck gets both a sack and a stack, then walks off. He’s a good actor, at least by my standards.

Texano def. Johnny Mundo by DQ

This was a very good match carried by Johnny. Texano is actually supported now, which is nice for him, I guess. Mundo is just too good, and has more freedom as a heel. Texano’s first feud in LU was against patron – Johnny’s opponent for Ultima Lucha, but here we can’t get a decisive winner, as The Crew jump the blue collar bud and kick him into the mats. 70/100

Johnny joins the hired guns, but Alberto runs out like a rabid perro and chases Mundo away. He also kicks both gangsters down, letting Texano to lay them out with the bull rope.

Hernandez chills in Dario’s place and drinks a light can beer and not scotch, what a heel. Dario says he’s going to fight with Drago, but not in a normal match. Strap match? Nah. Believer’s Backlash, where fans will have the permission to lash the competitor that gets thrown on the outside. Hm… doesn’t that favor Drago a ton? I wouldn’t strike a fan favorite that can breathe fire. Hernandez hopes there’s insurance, because he also hates fans. Strong Batista vibes lol.

The Mack def. Cage

What the hell, this bout lasted for less than a minute, and Mack once again won with a pinning maneuver. Cage looks like an idiot, but storyline reasons explain this booking. 20/100

Two guys start brawling around, and the security lads are useless. They get thrown around like they weight 100 pounds. Mack and Cage fight on the stairs, so Dario comes out to stop them. Says that Ultima Lucha is so big, they will need two weeks instead of one. Books two of them in a falls count anywhere match, and they will open the show! Lovely stipulation, thanks, El Jefe.

Dario isn’t going anywhere, instead he explains the concept of the Gift of the Gods title. Basically a MITB, but you can’t cash in anytime you want, because Cueto needs a week to promote the match. Pentagon and Jake Strong have entered the chat. Anyway, this is a number one contendership title, but if you wait too long, you have to defend it too. After the #1 contender relinquishes the title, the medallions are re-distibuted. All the Aztec Medallion holders get out to put their gifts in the title, but there’s no Fenix around, so Dario puts his medallion up for grabs in a Battle Royal, where two last men are fighting to a pinfall or submission. Fenix comes out, he’s late. Well, he has to fight to get his gift back.

Battle Royal for the last Aztec Medallion

Famous B starts off hot, hitting a PEDIGREE! He also throws in a ‘suck it’ chant and Hogan’s pose, eliminates Mandel (who plays one of Catrina’s skeletons) and Argentis. Killshot foes for the turnbuckle spot for some reason, easily gets pushed off by Daivari… he also disposes off Vinny Massaro, Mascarita monkey flips Super Fly out of the ring, eliminating himself in the process. Marty Martinez (who gets his third shot at the medallion) teams up with the persian suave asshole with lots of real estate to eliminate doorag-wearing Famous B. Fenix throws out Daivari, now it’s only between him and The Moth, a battle to a one fall. Did you know that Marty was the original pick to play Mil Muertes? Yeah, that could have happened. Fenix wins after a botched pin move. Meh, the winner was never in question, only Killshot could have been a viable contender, but he got eliminated early. 54/100

To close the show, we get to hear Prince Puma speak for the first time. Damn, he really didn’t speak all season, did he? Champ is quickly interrupted by a suit-wearing Mil! Catrina looks hot, as always.

Disciples of Death jump Puma, but he quickly dispatches all three of them. Mil tries to teach Prince a lesson himself, but also gets grounded. Puma stares at Catrina and poses with the title, he’s the man for now. So is Konnan dead or what?

Show Rating: 63/100 (C) The card is finalized, and it is STACKED. I chose to leave it for my Sunday, so I’m very excited to see the Season 1 finale. Shame that Killshot is off the card, better luck next time.

SEASON 1, EPISODE 38 (ULTIMA LUCHA NIGHT ONE)

What a blessed Sunday this is for me. I’m ready rewatch Ultima Lucha, and I expect two-three bouts cracking in the top 10 of match ratings. We get nice recaps for Mack/Cage, Trios title match, Drago/Hernandez, so these are our quasi pre-show matches for tonight.

Black Lotus does chin ups in her cage, Dario greets her with champagne, but she’s not in the mood.

Cueto is sharply dressed actually, looks like a million bucks. Well, he’s rocking a bowtie, of course. He mentions that pitbulls by nature are not violent animals, they are only dangerous when people beat them. He looks at Matanza and tells this is exactly the case with his brother, as his father ran underground shows with Matanza. Wow, that’s cool. Then Dario says that Matanza didn’t kill her parents, it was Dragon Azteca. He was at war with the girls’ dad who ran The Black Lotus tribe in Hong Kong. Black Lotus is pissed and starts punching the wall. It doesn’t take much for people to trust Dario, huh?

Annoucner hype up the show, and holy shit, they have nice posters hanging around.

Maybe slightly too much work around Cage’s eyes. The woman is bored, but who cares? Falls Count Anywhere match is next.

Cage def. The Mack – Falls Count Anywhere

Cage attacks Mack on the stairs, they brawl around the fans and Willie sends Cage back first on the wooden bleachers with an Exploder Suplex! He later spears Cage through the door, this a wild brawl. Cgae sprays Mack with a fire extuingisher, puts a STOP sign to use and DDT’s Mack on it too! Mack breaks a plank across Cage’s back, blasts a hand fridge against Cage’s skull, and some beers fall off. Pops the Mackweisers, STUNNER!!

PEOPLE ARE LOSING THEIR SHIT, Cage still kicks out. Glass bottle to the back of the head? No problem, LARIAT from Cage! Powerbomb through the table from the third turnbuckle, Cage lives!!! They go on top again, Spinebuster onto the garbage can from Mack. That Special Suplex onto the roof from THE MACHINE, and finally a Curb Stomp on the gimmicked cinder blocks. This is something I would show to people that don’t care about wrestling to get them hooked. 88/100

How the heck do you follow that? I rewatched the match twice now, super fun. 88 only because it’s kinda short. Star making performance for both men regardless.

Disciples of Death def. Team Havoc – Trios Titles match

Finally faces thought of coming out through the smoky corridor to solve Ivelisse’s staircase riddle. This is a tornado like match, no standing in the corner. Ivelisse throws her crutches away, and faces gets smacked around for a bit, but then turn up the mojo a bit, but nor for long. Angelico takes a nasty bump on the bleachers, but you know what? Yeah, you know what.

ANGELICO IS A FUCKING MADMAN.

Catrina targets Ivelisse and they roll around a bit until the stone puts out “The Baddest Bitch In The Building”… One of the disciples only have to cover her. This is a weird one, the spot with Angelico is maybe the craziest one yet, but aside from it, not enough super memorable moments. Oh no, wait, Catrina LICKS Ivellise with authority, extra contact. 66/100

New champions are posing with the belts, they are not well liked here.

Up next is the Believer’s Backlash, Drago vs. Hernandez. The believers populate the ringside, let’s see what this was like, because I don’t remember this match being any good.

Drago def. Hernandez

Hernandez quickly throws Drago out, but fans don’t attack him. But they sure do whip hernandez, they don’t hold back too, someone had the balls to slap it across the man’s head! Like, look at how red it is. I bet it was that “Hottub guy”, a damn maniac he is.

Drago gets Border Tossed on some fans, I am low key supporting Hernandez here. He’s a trooper for taking this match. Mama, there goes that man!

He’s blinded and whipped by the gang of blood thirsty fans, so he crawls under the ring. Drago finds nunchaks, and by God, that man-dragon has some serious skills. VALLOPS Hernie with them, puts him on the table, simple Splash breaks it. Drago throws Hernie back, and adds one more Splash for the road. Interesting match, and out of my respect to Hernandez, it’s going to be. 71/100

Some hype for Night Two, and an angle for El Dragon Azteca. He s about to enter The Temple, but is stopped by some guy who knows his every move. El Dragon Azteca Jr, I believe. Says he can’t go, or he will die. Dragon Azteca doesn’t care, he failed and because of that she’s locked. Mystery guy says let’s ask Puma for help, but he has a lot on his plate as it is. Actually, there was a line “He brought her to you once, he can do it again.” I thought Azteca kidnapped Lotus, no? Perhaps he kidnapped her to bring her back in his dojo? Well, maybe I will find out the answer some time.

Show Rating: 74/100 (B-) Very solid night one, Mack/Cage stole the show, other two matches were also fun, butnot good enough to crack the top 10 for sure.

SEASON 1, EPISODE 39 (ULTIMA LUCHA NIGHT TWO)

So, this is the end of season one. What a great season it was, and some of the best moments from it are still waiting to happen. Vamp is not commentating tonight, so Michael Schiavello takes his place. He tries, but his voice is weird for my liking, hard to listen to him ham it up. But f that, Mundo opens the show.

Johnny Mundo def. Alberto El Patron

Patron chases after the talented runner Johnny, throws him around, then gets some dust thrown into his face. Well, this is obviously a very good wrestling match, and the best Patron match in The Temple. They pulled off everything they had, I guess. Johnny pulled Elias for a Superkick, got caught into a submission, tapped out because why not, then got trapped into a rope-assisted armbar. That’s when Melina shows up to blast Alberto with his belt, to give her man a victory after Fin del Mundo. Not a bad match, but the finish spoiled it. 82/100

Johnny and Melina make out, but Alberto is not done. He throws Mundo into the chairs, then throws him into the glass face first!

Spanks Melina for good measure, and holy shit Mundo bleeds hard.

That’s gruesome. Patron winks at Johnny and walks away with the Mega championship. Shame it wasn’t on the line, perhaps it would add something to the bout.

El Dragon Azteca enters the prison, Black Lotus asks if he came for her. Dario is there too, saying that Azteca broke the treaty, and punishment for that is death. He teases letting out Matanza, Dragon tells him to leave the monster in the cage, but Cueto doesn’t need to. Black Lotus chokes out her master and drives a hand to his spine… breaking it? Well, she just started a war and Dario says they have to run to some other Temple. Matanza is also going with them… Next up is a Cero Miedo match. Just look at Vamp.

Pentagon Jr. def. Vampiro – Cero Miedo

Penta slams the chair against Vamp’s back, and they brawl around the fans. More chairshots, and Pentagon drops the announcer on the exposed floor, chokes him with a cord. Rick Knox throws an X sign, and we take a commercial break.

As we return, Vamp rises from the stretcher and goes back to the ring! Spinning wheel kick, vintage Vamp. Gets a bag of thumbtacks, drops Penta on them! Goes for some crazyass Phoenix Splash and lands right on his ass and on the thumbtacks.

LIGHTTUBES TO VAMP’S NECK! Sheesh, this is CZW territory. Penta drives them into his face, discovers more, but a timely Hip Toss saves the legend. Penta licks Vamp’s blood of his elbow, a truly fearless motherfucker. Vamp does the same and produces a BIG KABOOSH, smacking the tubes on Penta’s head.

Vamp dedicates the next move to Matt, belly to belly suplex from the top turnbuckle into the shards! Vamp slides the table into the ring, finds the lighting fluid, sets the table alight…

Mad lads. Pentagon pins Vamp, getting the biggest win of his career. Vamp asks Penta to break his arm, and he does. Penta calls out his master, and Vamp grabs the mic. “As your teacher I can say, you’re ready, my son!” Huge reveal, Penta kneels to Vampiro and they pose together. While this was not a wrestling clinic, the emotions, the gore and the storyline made this an instant classic. 90/100 (A)

Iconic image, Pentagon is a made man.

Fenix wins a 7-Way Match for the Gift of The Gods

It’s really weird to switch from ultrahardcore to this type of bout. Who knows what was filmed when, but as a viewer, this is quite a contrast. It starts with Ryck dominating, throwing everyone around and even teasin a dive, yeah right. Other guys get their time to fly around to, but Ryck is the main man until we get another crazy spot jump.

Aerostar/Angelico jump off, who says no? Marty The Moth gets in on the action once again, he just can’t leave Sexy alone. Gets schooled once more, Cuerno with probably the BEST dive you will ever see!! Shot Bengala and put him in the Red Book.

Ryck is back in the ring, just SLAMS Sexy into oblivion and here’s Daivari. They botch a surprise attack, and Delavar screams that Ryck is fired, but for what? Jack Evans tries to steal one, but there’s also Cuerno and Fenix. Super innovative spots by all three, but in the end, Fenix pins Evans after a Fire Driver to win the title! No bad matches yet, this one was pretty cool too. 83/100

The man that can’t die wins the title that gifts him immortality. Seems like a waste. Just kidding, Fenix deserves it more than anyone.

Blue Demon Jr. def. Texano – No DQ

So, the battle between to lucha libre stars is on. Blue Demon Jr. is accompanied by the Blue Crew, and some below the belt jokes are writing themselves. Due to his legendary status, Blue Demon has made it a No DQ match, so Cortez and Cisco are free to get in. Texano fares well, but then Chavo shows up with a dented chair he attacked Demon with, and smacks it across Texano’s dome. Extremely weak shot by Demon too, he covers the blue collar dude with his one leg. This is trash, I’m sorry. By far the worst bout in Ultima Lucha, but it comes before the main event, so it cools down the crowd. 27/100

Mil Muertes def. Prince Puma – Lucha Underground championsip match

There must be a winner, so no DQs or count outs. They brawl a lot on the outside, for like five starting minutes it is just brawling amongst the fans. At one point Puma uses Catrina as a weapon, the dealiest weapon of them all for sure. Was it impovisation? Doesn’t matter, it was awesome. Huge powerbomb on the steps, Puma gets thrown back in the ring, we missed it. And then, the classic suicide dive counter, or as some call it, the Benoit spot. Sickening shot to the head.

At this point I just said fuck it, I will just enjoy the match as it is, without stopping myself every two minutes to write something. This was the ultimate main event. On one side we have a strong champ that busted out hot matches with his eyes closed. On the other hand, the rejuvenated Mil, who is one of the top heels. He’s clearly second only behind Johnny, I think, but this bout proved that he’s actually THE top rudo. They have laid it all on the line, presented new moves, kicked out of each other finishers. That alone is not a guarantee of success, but here it actually matters a ton. You believe in this fight.

Puma is a total freak. Not only he is the most gifted high flyer, he’s also a very strong cat. He muscled up Mil at one time and I just thought “wow”, he’s so amazing. He can do it all, well, maybe mic work is not his best suit, but who needs that when you’re so good in the ring? Catrina is just awesome, you know why. This was clearly one of top matches LU could have booked for its main event. Does it crack the top 3? Yes. I think Mundo/Puma All Night Long match was perfect, and this one falls just slightly under. Do yourself a favor and watch the match, dammit. 96/100

The age of the death is upon us.

Black Lotus flees The Temple with money and Dario. They also brought Matanza, and we see his mug for the first time. Fenix leaves the building in his fancy car, Cuerno follows him in a Caddilac. The true hunter, and the logo is scrapped for legal reasons. Sexy is tied up and Marty can’t wait to introduce her to his sister. Angelico and Son of Havoc agree to get the titles back when they can. The biker asks Ivelisse about one last ride, “just shut up and get on”. Aerostar and Drago shake hands, they will meet again. Fenix goes up in flames, Aerostar sets himself off like a rocket. Penta asks Vamp where they will go now? To a much darker place. El Dragon Azetca Jr is born, and he spray paints a question mark over the giant LU banner. Dario leaves The Temple in slow mo… with a sinister look on his face. Man, what a season! Perfect vignette to end it, Ultima Lucha is for real.

Show Rating: 97/100 (A*) That’s how you book a show of the year. Bravo! I will take a one week break at least to prepare myself for Season 2.

And so one week has passed.

I intentionally waited to simulate the break between the seasons, even though it was just one week, not a year or two. Between season 1 and 2 we got a snazzy comic book that killed off some characters and tied up the stories for season two. Loved all three or for issues, will provide you with a link later. Before we get to episode 1, let’s review the trailer.

So much to take in! Vamp is in the psych ward, but he is taken by Matt who always wears the same jacket. Sexy escaped Marty’s company, and Mariposa is shown for the first time. Ivelisse and Son of Havoc are reunited with Angelico, Cisco is in jail, Catrina rocks a new haircut. Johnny trains in his dojo, PJ Black and Jack Evans double team Drago with nunchaks in the toilet (!!!), either Dante or Killshot is showcased in action on the hostile ground, Puma and Penta fight backstage, Mil and Catrina walk around the place like they own it (partially true), little girl meets Aerostar, Puma punches a hole in the punching bag, Dario turns around looking dope. Love it all! Let’s begin then!

SEASON 2, EPISODE 1 (A MUCH DARKER PLACE)

It’s been 181 day without incident with Vampiro, who’s trapped in a psychotic break division. Some hipster looking shrink asks Vamp genric questions about his behavior, dreams and mental condition. Of course Vamp lies through his teeth, having flashbacks of his Cero Miedo match.

Clipboard scribbling intensifies, and this doc gives Vamp some pills, telling him to avoid places that trigger his violent impulses. Ha-ha buddy, sure. We get a preview of what could have been, with vamp losing his shit and dunking psych’s head on the table, biting him in the neck, but that all was just a dream. Vamp is a good boy, he wouldn’t do that. Striker picks his brotha up and informs him that The Temple is a much darker place now, which makes Vamp smirk. Now, how cool was this vignette? Both announcers look cooler than half of WWE roster on their good day.

Imagine Michael Cole and Byron Saxton getting a spotlight like this one… announcers don’t have to be nerds or dorks, man.

We get to the redecorated office of Dario that now belongs to Catrina. Nice room, it lacked a woman’s touch. Fenix steps in with his Gift of the Gods title and says that he’s back after Mil and his title. Well, as a new boss Catrina says that is his right, but under the rules he has to wait for next week, given that he still has the title until then. Cuerno has been hunting him for months… and they will fight tonight with Mil watching from the throne. Fenix vs Cuerno is a fanstastic match up!

Mil is sitting on the throne near the arc that has the skulls of the musicians who used to play there before. One of those skulls could also belong to Big Ryck… I’m not joking, read the comic book.

King Cuerno def. Fenix – Gift of the Gods championship match

Was there any better way to start off season 2 then with two of the most athletic guys on the roster? Then again, Puma and Mundo would like a word. Fenix reminds everyone just how flippy he can be, and Cuerno holds his own and debuts a new finisher to win the title! Snug kicks and plenty of high flying and mat-based offence here, they are splendid all-rounders. This was a great match, for the fresh and hungry crowd. Really awesome stuff. 84/100 (B+)

Son of Havoc, Ivellise and Angelico are back and ready to fight for the Trios titles. Catrina meets them and denies them a rematch, saying they can fight each other instead, with the winner facing mil for the title… tonight. Welp, that’s all you had to say. Ivy says when she wins, she will be coming for Catrina. Ballsy of her!

Catrina comes out to whisper the next match in Melissa’s ear, and people react loudly when they understand their favorite trio is fighting each other. The ‘woah’ when Angelico comes out is a great moment. Before this match Catrina congratulates Cuerno and reminds them of their deal. Mil does not have to worry about it.

Ivelisse def. Son of Havoc and Angelico

This was a fun, storyline-driven match with a lot of cool spots. It’s good to see Ivelisse healthy and able to compete, not just play her part as a manager of sorts. Her win comes as a bit of an upset, after she jammed Havoc’s huevos on the turnbuckle and pinned Angelico with La Magistral. The fans were hot for this bout and it never stopped giving us more. Love this team. 79/100 (B)

Three Jesse Pinkman’s are looking for The Temple, and Black Lotus asks if they are lost, then tells them to come with her. Who would say no, right? But looks like a honey pot.

Son of Havoc and Angelico stay for a bit to support the friend in her uphill battle, but The Disciples of Death (Argenis, Ricky Mandel and El Mariachi Loco in costumes) are there to clear the ring for Mil.

Mil Muertes def. Ivelisse – Lucha Underground championship match

Mil toys with Ivelisse cause her punches and kicks do no damage to him. She does catch him ina Guillotine once, and hyperextends his arm on the ropes, also ducking a Spear that wipes out “El Jefa” Catrina. Strong bump, roll up doesn’t work, and Flatliner tucks Ivy to bed. Long squash match, really, but the hope spots were good. 54/100 (C-)

After this beatdown Catrina refuses Ivy, and tells Mil to bust out one more Flatliner. But here’s Puma, he rescues the woman and gets away, distracting Muertes. PENTAGON with a backbreaker, and it’s time to break some bones!

What a picture. Puma is like “WTF”, Catrina is losing her shit, and two honchos in the ring are not too bad either. Need to hang this picture on my wall or something. At the very end of the show Black Lotus leads some marks to the container. Dario gets 20 bucks from each dude to get in and get some violence fix. Matanza just mauls them while Dario smiles… Black Lotus is a total heel, as I see.

Show Rating: 83/100 (B) A strong return, and a perfect season opener. Loved the first match and the mini storyline of Ivelisse. Her being the first woman to challenge for the main title is a good LU trivia question, I feel like.

SEASON 2, EPISODE 2 (THE DARK & THE MYSTERIOUS)

Cool Ultima Lucha recap splashed with some footage from last week opens the show. The first vignette of the night belongs to Puma, who always pumps iron in the gym. Scott Steiner would be proud. Puma is approached by pentagon, who tells that tonight they will face The Disciples of Death, and after that, he will beat Puma. A fancy brawl starts and Puma comes out stronger. Penta is now mixing it up with the main guys, but doesn’t dominate them as much as he will be. Sneak attack on Mil and a losing effort to Puma, he has some way to go.

Mil sulks on his throne in a sling, poor guy. Bet he will feel better when he sees the next match.

Johnny Mundo def. Killshot

That is one sweet opener, and Killshot got a very good near fall. Mundo hits a modified low blow, adds a Flying Chuck and lands The End of the World to take a victory here. If I recall correctly, this is not their first match. Would liek it to go longer, Killshot is one of my favorites and Mundo is one of the best. 73/100 (B-)

Mundo gets a mic and check out this line… “That little earthquake that shook you when you were a boy is nothing compared to how The End of the World is gonna feel!” Holy shit, that’s a money line. Cage interrupts Johnny and mocks Muertes for being hurt. Johnny steals Cage’s thunder “yeah-yeah, you’re a machine, we all heard that before” which is fun. Cage says let’s fight right now, Mundo runs away, then returns to hit Cage in his massive back, but still ends up retreating in fear. This is gonna be a totally sweet rivalry. Also I want to say that Cage has that Benoit-like promo delivery, simple phrases but lots of intensity make it work ok.

Sexy is tied in Marty’s place, she’s all beaten up and bruised after tortures. Marty brings her a dead butterfly, gross. Says that his sister told him Sexy will turn into a beautiful butterfly soon and fly back to The Temple, and she won’t do that alone – he’s coming with her.

PJ Black is riding a bike, confessing that he is a thrill addict and that he goes to LU for that fire under his ass. Just like a wold, he’s not afraid. As most debutants do in their vignette, PJ lays waste to same bad guys. He’s not afraid, everybody, and that’s a shoot, the man is really an adrenaline junkie.

The Mack def. PJ Black

Interesting match, both guys are percieved as babyfaces. Mack is still looking good after his face was driven into a cinderblock by Cage. He catches PJ with a cutter to get an upset of sorts. Some Tanahashi mannerisms from Black, the way he gets on the ropes and stuff like that. Not a bad debut, solid bout. 62/100 (C)

Kobra Moon describes herself and says that she will strike next week. Mr. DeJoseph mentioned that one downside of season 1 were injuries to lead female talent, so we get more luchadoras to fix it.

Pentagon Jr. and Prince Puma def. The Disciples of Death

The result was never in doubt, even though it was a 3 on 2 match. Between kicking the skeletons in the huesos, Penta and Puma argued amon themselves. Props to one of them for taking a tope bump on the chair! Eventually Prince hits a Splash and Penta jumps in to steal the pin. What a rudo. The match is really nothing special, but it’s good to see Puma and Pentagon sharing the same ring. 51/100 (D+)

The unmistakable voice of a certain Rey Rey tells Dragon Azteca Jr. that he’s a chosen one, and that mask gives the owner special powers. Rey himself was close to wearing it, but he has chosen a different path. Welcome, King!

Show Rating: 67/100 (C+) Of course this was worse than episode 1, but still fun. PJ Black debuts, Kobra Moon and Rey show up on our screens, some promising storylines progress. The downside comes down to the main event, I can’t get excited about The Disciples.

SEASON 2, EPISODE 3 (THE HUNT IS ON)

Vampiro is sooo red. The first match of the night is Kobra Moon’s debut against the mighty Bengala.

Kobra Moon def. Bengala

Very carefully planned bout designed to put Moon over. She has sexualized mannerisms, and doesn’t act like a snappy business lady that keeps dragons captive just yet. Dragon sleeper or Snake Slipper puts the cat to nap town. 40/100

Fenix assertively demands one more match with Cuerno, Catrina flirts with him and then we get Aerostar warning the ancient civilain about Gods coming over in the face of men. He says it’s vital that the tribes are united, only that can save them. The little girl does not beleive that will be possible… the little girl in that vignette? Not gonna reveal it just yet for the new viewers. Catrina points out that Cuerno won, but did not destroy Fenix. Tonight he will face the bird in a Last Luchadore Standing match, no title on the line! Huge bout.

Jack Evans def. Drago

Jack oversells like he’s HBK, for real. Good one, not as crazy as Evans/Aerostar though. Drago got too smart with his signature pin and Jack stole one. Post match Evans calls himself the dragon slayer. 72/100

Texano video and recap of how Blue Demon’s posse screwed him at Ultima Lucha. Some jabronies taste Texano’s sandsnake, as they do in these vids. Texano destroys the place but the owner woman doesn’t give a fudge.

Puma mourns Konnan in the toilet, until Catrina appears. Next week he’s fighting Pentagon!!

Fenix def. King Cuerno – Last Luchadore Standing

I don’t know about you, guys, but LMS matches are not cool in my book because of their usual stop-go flow. This was also evident here, and I don’t like it when there’s a long count after a simple dropkick. The action is very good though, and Cuerno hits his tope under a different angle, which is fresh. I liked the grand finale, it was simple and effective. Perhaps not the uber ending, but ok in my book. 81/100

At the end the cop Cortez is spilling the beans to Captain Vasquez who leads a case against Cueto. Cortez doesn’t know where Dario is, so the woman adds Joey Ryan to the mix to help him out. Not a fan of Joey Ryan, never was one. But the whole story with Vasquez flew past me, so I’m taking notes.

Final Rating: 72/100 (B-) Solid show with a spicy main event. Shame about Bengala and Drago…

SEASON 2, EPISODE 4 (CERO MIEDO)

A recap of two past shows highlights Ivelisse/Mil and Pentagon breaking the arm of Muertes. Now Ivie is in Catrina’s office, demanding a rematch against her disciples. No, under Catrina there’s no automatic rematch clauses and she and her boys have to prove their worth first. La Jefa plays with the knife and licks it when “The Baddest Bitch In The Building” is out. They teased a match here too, good start and an even better continuation, as tonight we will see Pentagon facing Puma in a signles match!!

Ivelisse, Son of Havoc, Angelico def. Cisco, Cortez, Chavo Guerrero

The Crew is running again, but without Blue Demon. This was probably the first time the faces tagged in and out like a normal unit, and it cemented their win here. Angelico is great, shame he did not get a chance to battle Mil, but I understand why they went with Ivelisse. Good win for them and a solid opener. 65/100

Post match Texano attacks The Crew with the sandsnake, teasing the match with Chavo. They’re trying hard to push Texano, but I am not sure it is working.

A sweet Johnny Mundo promo, weher he talks about stealing the show at Ultima Lucha. Don’t know about that, but he won at least, even though he got his face shoven in the glass window. No mention of Melina here, and Patron is referenced quietly, as he’s in WWE at this point. Mundo says it’s his world, and all the rest are just leaving in it, and Cage is no exception. Good work, Johnny!

Joey Ryan mocks Cortez for losing and says he’s a better cop and that his match is up next.

Cage def. Joey Ryan

Not a squash though, Ryan gets a lot of offence and even dominates at one point, which is just wrong. He’s a well known face in the area though, but that won’t help here. Steiner Screwdriver to end this match, Cage had to wipe his feet across the sleazy one, in my opinion. 52/100

Johnny spears Cage after the match, but their fighting sequence ends with Weapon X! Cage is booked strongly here, he gets the better of Johnny once again.

Rey spars with El Dragon Azteca Jr, telling him the story of his mentor. 25 years ago Cueto’s father came to Mexico and met El Dragon Azteca and they formed a partnership to find the descendents of seven Aztec tribes and let them do battle once again. Antonio Cueto got so caught up that he sacrificed his own son to the Gods (Matanza) and let inhabit them his body. Two parted ways making a treaty that neither would step foot in either’s domain again, and Cueto sealed that treaty with dark magic. Rey tells Azteca Jr. that he shouldn’t go looking for revenge, but instead try to do the impossible. Find a way to unite seven tribes…

Next week we’ll gonna see Cage vs. Mundo, and now it’s Penta/Puma!

Prince Puma def. Pentagon Jr.

Really good match for them, but not something you blow off the roof with. Pentagon holds his own with the ex-champ and gets the loudest chop ever out of him. You know how awkward it is when you shush the crowd, miss by a fraction of an inch and the sound is off? Never happened here. Very fun, but the finish is wonky. Penta hits Puma with a Package Piledriver, then for some reason goes for the Surfboard he almost never uses. Puts his shoulders down on the mat, while keeping his own tight to the mat. Puma makes a head stand last second to fool Penta and get the win. Creative, sure, but you know that something like that had to happen. By the way, the GIF above is 1.23 Mb in size… 80/100

Penta superkicks Marty Elias, but then eats a Windmill kick. Puma teases an arm break on Pentagon, but thinks against it. he’s a better man. The show ends with Sexy running down the corridor and bumping into Mack, who asks who did that to her? The Moth, but not him… she. Mack turns around with a startled look, a bit cringy imo.

Show Rating: 72/100 (B-) Not a bad show,but Puma and Penta kinda had to save it. They did, but then again, they could go for longer and have a much better match. Good effort.

SEASON 2 EPISODE 5 (THE MACHINE)

Most of the recap is dedicated to Mundo/Cage feud. They are in tonight’s main event, which promises to be a banger. Also Texano/Chavo is highlighted, but I can’t get excited about that rivalry. Pentagon also talks with Vampiro a bit, he will not stop until he gets what belongs to him, and even Catrina will not stop him.

Jack Evans def. PJ Black

Good high spots opener involving two guys who will soon be a part of one stable. PJ dominated the bout and looked stronger than Jack the trash talker, and even got a close near fall when Jack was distracted by a helmet-wearing Drago. Drago gets loser and accidentally sprays green mist in PJ’s face, Evans pins Black with a rollover Backslide. Not bad, but the dirty finish dings this a bit. PJ is 0-2 btw. 63/100 (C)

First ever Famous B vignette rolls in, oh yeah! He will turn you from jobber to a robber, daddy.

King Cuerno def. Killshot

Cuerno is the champion, but he does not defend his ttle tonight, holding some pact with Catrina and Mil. Killshot looks good, and shows everyone how cool he is, but comes up short one more time. Some wins are sorely needed to put him up a level. It was pretty short, and lacked selling, but apart from that it was a cracking match. 73/100 (B-)

Fenix saves Killshot from the “Thrill of the Kill”, Cuerno bails and poses with the title.

The Crew and Chavo Guerrero def. Texano

Cisco enters first and goes out in seconds after a Superkick. Cortez fares better and pushes Texano a bit, still goes down after a Powerbomb. Chavo enters last and almost gets pinned, but then Cortez returns to push Texano’s legs under the ropes with a sandsnake. By the way, Chavito stomped on Cisco after he was out but they hugged it out afterwards. The match is nothign special, I don’t think it elevated Texano any bit. 54/100 (C-)

Matanza is munching up on marks in his container, while Dario tells Black Lotus about his abusive mother that tried to kill him until Matanza stepped in and bashed her in the back of the head with a bull statue. For him, it is a warm memory. You sick MFer…

Pentagon is in the backstage ring, and he yells to Catrina to book him in a rematch with Puma. Why should she listen to him after he broke Mil’s arm? Penta says she can break her arm too, and a fter a fighting sequence leading to a Sacrifice position, Catrina teleports. She gives him a match, but says him putting his hands on her was a big mistake.

Johnny Mundo def. Cage

Striker calls Cage a Swoleverine, lol. The match is great, and they have good chemistry. Enough time to showcase how gifted they are. Crazy athleticsm by Johnny for a move you can see above, and Cage is always a machine. He hit Mundo with a Weapon X and was close to pinning the #1 heel in LU, but then wild Taya ran out and slid the metal pipe to her boyfriend. SMACK and Mundo pins Cage. Once again a dirty finish, only Cuerno won clean this episode. Undoubtedly the match of the night. 77/100 (B-)

Taya and Johnny attack Cage together post match, knees to the corner and Fin del Mundo to cut it.

Cuerno visits Catrina’s office and he wants to cash in on Mil with his title. But they had a deal? Catrina smirks and says Cuerno already has a match for next week against Fenix, and that title will be on the line in a Ladder match! Oh yeah, that’s how you end the show. Can we take a second to appreciate how good of a booker catrina is kayfabe-wise at least? She’s not holding off with money matches.

Show Rating: 76/100 (B-) We had four matches, thus all of them were a bit limited in lenght. Main event was alright, and so was Cuerno/Killshot. Stories are developing, and we get a hint that Aztec Warfare is coming. Good show!

SEASON 2, EPISODE 6 (GIFT OF THE GODS LADDER MATCH)

Mil summons Catrina and chokes her a bit, blaming La Jefa for his broken arm. He wants both Pentagon and Puma, but Catrina says no, also reminding Pasqaual Mendoza about his childhood. Without her, he would still be a scared little boy. Muertes rages… can we just appreciate that Mil actually sells the arm injury, unlike many other Pentagon victims? Granted most of them are written off TV, but still. Mil has to chill though, he lets his ahds go loose a lot around Catrina.

Kobra Moon def. Sexy Star

The bout started off a bit awkwadly and I was really sceptical about the quality of the match, but then these luchadoras started doing some cool submission moves and rolled around for a bit. Mack came out to support Sexy cause they’re pals now, and Marty “The Moth” also showed up to distract Star and assist Kobra to win her second match. 43/100

Vamp and Matt make a big deal of Sexy tapping out here. Up next is Puma/Pentagon and Cuerno/Fenix in a ladder match!

Famous B is telling all of us to call him while punching some jabronies in the D. Very cheesy, but he’s charismatic. We pan out from the TV screen as Rey Mysterio turns off the telly. “HEY, I WAS WATCHING THAT!” says Dragon Azteca Jr. He kicks his bollocks in, saying there’s no time for TV, he should be ready for HIS DESTINY! Fun stuff.

Short and sweet Cuerno promo here, explains that he’s not blood thirsty, but admits that the kill gives him a satisfaction. His prey now is Fenix, and after he hunts him down, he will become the Lucha Underground champion.

Pentagon Jr. def. Prince Puma by DQ

Of course it’s a nice bout, but it went for only five minutes and was interrupted by Mil, who tore his sling off and Chokeslammed Penta to throw the match away. Puma was dominating the bout, but got tamed pretty quickly by a Punch and a Spear. 63/100

Double Flatliner marks Mil’s return to active competition, and I hope he gets busy quick. He walks down the corridor afterwards telling Catrina that next week he will defend his title against them both.

Matt and Vamp announce the return of the Aztec Warfare! Three weeks away. And now it’s main event time. Muertes will watch from his throne, and both guys will get a lot of time.

Fenix def. King Cuerno in a Ladder Match for the Gift of the Gods title

The bout starts out slowly and Cuerno almost drops a ladder on the fan in the front row. Fenix witha flashy dive to the outside, lots of brawling. The tempo is not high for these two, but they compensate it with loud kicks that sound like chops. There were a couple of dangerous spots, for example when Cuerno pushed Fenix down on the ladder leaning against the ring. “He broke his ass, that’s it” – said Vampiro. Fenix also flew from the platform with a Cannonball and avoided a ladder hit, with Cuerno hitting the ring post himself. Dudes got high and fell off after hanging for a bit on the thing that holds the belt and finally Fenix drove Cuerno through a table after a jump-around-the-ropes Hurricanrana. Can’t say this was outstanding, certainly below my expectations. Respect for the bumps, but they had the chance to put on the absolute classic, and this was not that. No Suicide Dive too, smh… 79/100

Fenix has a stare down with Mil for a cool visual. Both titles held up high, their feud continues!

Final Rating: 73/100 (B-) Good enough, but not outstanding. Had Penta/Puma go longer and main event tempo increased just a bit, this would be an amazing episode.

SEASON 2, EPISODE 7 (DEATH COMES IN THREES)

Mack has a match with Marty tonight, and he wants Sexy in his corner. She refuses at first, but after a few words from Willie she changes her mind.

Marty “The Moth” Martinez def. The Mack

An exciting opener, Mack wasted no time to kick Marty around, and Moth himself flew around for a bit. Mack laid Moth out with a T-Bone Suplex and went for a Frog Splash when the lights went off and Mariposa came out to freak Sexy Star out. Moth expected that and put Mack down with an Elevated Curb Stomp! That’s his cryptonite, I think. 65/100

Marty introduces his sister and she boots Sexy in the face while she has a panic attack.

Fenix addresses his naysayers,pointing out that everyone doubted him all his life, but he defied the odds and will continue to do so. His eyes are on the Lucha Underground title, and he’s on his way to becoming a legend.

Drago sneak attacks Jack Evans who just took a piss in the toilet. PJ walks in with nunchaks, and the cinematic fight goes to PJ and “The Dragon Slayer” until Aerostar sparkles in the rest room and warns future buddies to not touch his amigo. Friendship fixed between Aerostar and Drago, you love to see it.

We’re promised a No DQ match between Mundo and Cage, but instead Taya comes out to verbally emasculate Cage and call him out for a fight instead. “I know you’re not a man, but let’s see if you have the balls to face me”… dang.

Cage def. Taya – No DQ

Mad props to Taya for taking some nasty bumps, Cage did not hold anything back. He even suplexed her outside of the ring through two tables, holy sheise. Taya held her own here, but still needed some help from Johnny to fight “The Machine”. Mundo bonked the lead pipe against Cage’s head, but that wasn’t enough. Beer bottles and cinderblocks get thrown in the ring, Taya saves Mundo from a Curb Stomp. Mundo cracks both empty bottles against Cage’s face, but he’s a FUCKING MACHINE so he no sells that, freaking Johnny out. He shoved Taya in Cage’s hands to save himself and one Weapon X later we got the winner. Underrated fight, not enough people talk about this one imo. 77/100

Another great skit with Famous B, now he turns Brenda from a bum into a bombshell. I like this guy, dialing up 423-GET-FAME right now, be right back.

Ivelisse leaves Catrina’s office with some news for Son of Havoc and Angelico. She got the title match, but if they lose – they hit the open road. WHAT? Oh sheesh, man up, you guys. Angelico also finds out that Ivelisse and Havoc are not a couple, even though they act like one.

Mil Muertes def. Prince Puma and Pentagon Jr.

Penta and Puma team up briefly to take on the bigger opponent. Mil endures and fights back, throwing and slamming both guys like they weight nothing. And then it turns into the most intense triple threat match to date! It is so absolutely awesome I can’t do it justice by words. Stop everything you’re doing right now and go watch it. All three men looked amazing here, and the fans never had a moment to stop chanting. Insanely good match out of nowhere and no heavy reliance on weapons too. Bravo to all three! Mil takes out both guys with a Double Flatliner and pins them both… wow, that’s how you rescue your title reign. Fucking A! 90/100

Catrina licks both Penta and Puma after the match, but we’re not done yet, as Fenix comes out to challenge Mil for a title match next week! He’s not wasting anytime, and this huge match comes just before the Aztec Warfare.

Final Rating: 86/100 (B+) Two great matches and a good opener, what’s not to love? Very strong effort, and it only gets better from here. Match 150 likely to happen next week!

SEASON 2, EPISODE 8 (LIFE AFTER DEATH)

The episode starts with a HOT angle, and I mean it in every way, because Catrina visits Fenix to express her love to the man that can’t die. She confesses that her decision haunts her and that she wants to be alive… they make out, but then Catrina says that was their last kiss becuase tonight Fenix will be destoryed once and for all.

Angelico, Ivelisse & Son Of Havoc defeat The Disciples Of Death (Barrio Negro, El Siniestro de la Muerte & Trece) (w/Catrina) (c) – Lucha Underground Trios Title Vs. Lucha Underground Careers Match

My favorite trio had to win the titles here or go home. It was a pretty good match, with the faces working well together unlike season 1. The result was never much in doubt, but it was still a decent opener. New champions, and this is not the only title match for tonight. It wasn’t long enough to get some great rating, and to be frank, Disciples suck quite a lot, even if by design. 64/100

Puma is working on his punches in the gym when he’s approached by Johnny, who says he will win Aztec Warfare this time, he went easy on him last time. Mundo makes a funny comment about Puma wearing giraffe pants, which makes Prince mad. He punches through the bag. U mad bro!?

Rey is pouring some tequila to El Dragon Azteca, saying that his training is now complete. He also gives an envelope with an invitation to The Temple. Rey is also coming, he has something to prove… they have a toast and agree that the best man will win.

Texano defeats Chavo Guerrero Jr. (w/Cortez Castro & Mr. Cisco) – Bullrope Match

A bullrope match is rarely fast-paced, this was no exception. The Crew dumped Chavo and walked off before the match, spoiling the result. A brawl followed and Chavo rode a sandpaper pony before going down after a simple powerbomb. It was the longest six minute match ever. Announcers say that Texano has avenged Mexico now, walloping Chavo after the fight. This whole Texano experiment is not working for me, but maybe some throwback style fans will appreciate it. 53/100

Mil throws the Disciples of Death over the lockers, he’s that strong. One skeleton dares to strike back, and gets floored quickly. Catrina tells Mil to spare them, and they walk out together. Check out the card shown before the segment.

Dario and Black Lotus are standing outside of the container where Matanza continues to maul some marks. Dario says that his brother is ready and we get to see Matanza for the first time… quite a visual, he’s all bloddy. Looks like a total monster, sheesh.

Fenix defeats Mil Muertes (w/Catrina) (c) – Lucha Underground Title Match

Another great match from these two, it was a war. They both got their masks ripped, both got juice and fought back and forth with the fans never being out of the match. People love Fenix and respect Muertes, add the story of their rivalry and Catrina to the mix, and you have one spicy main event. It wasn’t their best match together, but it’s a very notable one, as Fenix wins his first LU title here with a flashy roll up. Muertes is still a beast, and Fenix is naturally over with the people. Good stuff, memorable match #150! 89/100

After the match Catrina tells Fenix to celebrate while he can, because next week is Aztec Warfare… and he will defend his title in that match! To keep the traiditions, he will enter as number one, while Mil will enter 20th. The deck is stacked against the bird of war, but tonight he’s on top of the world

Show Rating: 81/100 (B) Very good go home show before aztec warfare that is stacked. Matanza, Rey Mysterio, Azteca, Puma, Mundo, Penta, Mil, Fenix, probably Cage and Cuerno… it’s going to be outstanding.

SEASON 2, EPISODE 9 (AZTEC WARFARE 2)

Pentagon stops Fenix backstage, telling him that tonight that title will be his. He’s like a true bro here, sees his sibling with a shiny toy and wants to play with it or break it. Until they can have a tug of war, Catrina appears and tells Pentagon that he lost the privilege to compete in the Warfare after he put his hands on her. Penta is not scared, Catrina says the only reason he has zero fear is because he never experienced any TRUE fear. That’s deep. Catrina also threatens Fenix, vanishes, and the Lucha Bros have a little stare down to end the segment. Lovin’ this episode already!

Striker and Vampiro discuss the rules of Aztec Warfare and the fact that Penta wasn’t invited while people and children wearing Aztec outfits smash the drums of war and engage in ritual dancing.

Matanza Cueto wins Aztec Warfare II

Fenix enters first, as in tradition. The champ is observed by Famous B and Beautiful Brenda, the manager says he wants to manage Fenix. Entrant number two is… REY MYSTERIO JR! Who’s that popping off the sky?? Here we go, Fenix is in awe.

Rey has a weird mask he got from the same artist making costumes for Drago, doesn’t translate well though. Fenix can’t shake the arm of Rey enough, and they have a nice little exchange before Cuerno enters as number 3. He kicks Rey down and sends out THE ARROW FROM THE DEPTHS OF HELL on Fenix. Argentis is next, commentators says that he missed some time, but in reality he just was a Disciple of Death. He’s quickly eliminated by Mysterio too.

Mundo is number 5, has a stare down with Rey! Mundo and Fenix roll around trying to eliminate each other, when Joey Ryan comes out as number 6. He cuffs himself to the barricade, with Famous B telling Brenda that he might be the smartest man in all of pro wrestling, that’s funny and quite subtle. Ryan gets superkicked by Cuerno and Famous B drops Joey his card, awesome. Puma is 7th and he wipes out the deck with an insane leap!! Jack Evans is 8th, and while he just goes to the ring, Rey gets Cuerno in the armbar… for a tap out, King is eliminated. Wow, not good.

Evans is stomped by all luchadores, and Mundo tries to join in, but he’s not one of them… Evans is kicked some more until Johnny pulls his fellow gringo to talk strategy. Taya is out so it’s 3-3, but not for long as CAGE is 10th! Mundo shocked, but after Cage beats up the rudos, Johnny sends him face first into the office window!! Mascarita Sagrada runs out, mocked by Mundo who also eats a Discus Lariat and Weapon X on the floor! Puma with a running Moonsualt, and Mundo is eliminated!! WTH. Moth is 12th, hits some nice spots.

Drago has the unlucky number, spooks Evans, sprays mist in Ryan’s face. Rey and Mascarita eliminate Moth… Mack finally has his cool theme music, hits Stunner on Marty and a sequence with Cage. 15th is Chavo, Drago pwerbombs Drago on the bleachers. Chavo eliminates Mascarita with a Camel Clutch. Mundo comes back to crush a cinderblock over Cage’s head, Taya pins him!! She’s then eliminated by Fenix while PJ makes his way to the ring. Aerostar retuns to help Drago with PJ and Jack. The impromtu tag match leads to Drago and Evans being out, 18th is Azteca! He hits some awesome high fly spots, Texano is 19th, scaring everybdoy with a bullrope. He elimiantes PJ too, the only guy left to enter in kayfabe is Mil. Penta jumps him from behind with a chair!! One splash from Rey is enough to eliminate Muertes… done dirty here, Catrina is pissed and screams at Vamp. BIG SLAP… and enter Dario Cueto!!

The sly doggy dog is back!! “My name is Dario Cueto, and this is MY TEMPLE!” Time for #21… his brother… THE MONSTER MATANZA CUETO! First move, The Tour of The Isalnds ELIMINATES FENIX!! Mack hits a Stunner to no effect, bridging german and he’s gone. Aerostar has the same fate, Texano jumps into a Powerbomb to go out. Matanza tears out cuffed Joey and eliminates him after a trio of Gutwrench Powerbombs. Dragon Azteca fares better, but is also Chokeslammed. Chavo is in the final 4, you kidding me? He tries to team up with Cueto, but also gets squashed. Rey and Puma team up, fromer champ is ragdolled and pinned too. Rey is the last hope… he hits a 619, but can’t kick out after Matanza’s finisher. Wow. That’s a monster push if I ever saw one. I wasn’t a fan of this massacre (no pun intended) when I first saw it, but now I can appreciate it. Cuerno, Mundo and Mil deserved stronger showings, and overall this was a tad bit worse than the first AW. No Killshot too. I think it’s a B+ for workrate and A+ for storytelling, so I’ll give this one an A for the status and notable debuts. 90/100

Final Rating: 83/100 (B) Shame about Pentagon missing out too, but Rey had a good debut and Matanza made a good impression, he’s a total beast.

SEASON 2, EPISODE 10 (EL JEFE IS BACK)

Dario brings back the music bands!! No more throne for Mil, doesn’t need it now, since his arm is healed.

El Jefe is thrilled to be back and says that Aztec Warfare was a huge success. He announces the brand new trios tournament and starts talking about the new number one contender when Penta interrupts him. As he sees it, Dario’s brother is champion only because he wasn’t involved in the match. Cueto says Penta is not championship material, and for that he almost gets his arm snapped. Cueto gives in, booking Penta against Matanza for the title… tonight!

The Crew def. Taya and Johnny

Weird match, since both teams are on the rudo side. I guess Cisco and Cortez turned face when they left Chavo to Texano, but the crowd doesn’t see them as good guys here. Cortez never has a problem laying it thick on women, and Johnny backpedals too many times here, playing a chickenshit heel role just because. Cage comes out to distract the couple, Taya eats a Shatter Machine. After Taya and Johnny smashed a cinderblock over his head, he has all the reason to hold a grudge against them. Story continues, but this match wasn’t that great. Big win for The Crew though. 51/100

Time for a juicy vignette. Marty The Moth flaunts his wealth and reveals that Moth Tribe is about two things… Aztec Pride and attraction to gold. All the other tribes are jealous of them, and there’s one person that keeps people in check – his sister Mariposa. A usual package where a new wrestler lays waste to shady dudes in the parking lot. Mariposa does not strike me as a brute, but she is portrayed as one here. Well, at least there’s some backstory to her.

Dario is sipping scotch when Catrina shows up, bypassing the guard Black Lotus. Cueto thanks her for keeping the Temple going, but he’s back and in charge now. Catrina threatens him, Cueto says he booked her disciple in a title rematch tonight, but that’s not good enough. Catrina says Matanza is not the rightful owner of the title though, and soon enough he will face death and she will take the power back in this place.

Ivelisse, Angelico, Son of Havoc def. The Disciples of Death

This title match is held under elimination rules, and Ivelisse is the first one to go out after Catrina gets involved. Angelico takes the mid portion of the match and its basically Shuri Knee city here. Gets an elimination, but also falls down to leave Son of Havoc alone against two disciples and Catrina. Turtle double stomp and a Standing Moonsault make it even, Catrina denies a Shooting Star Press and then gets kicked in the face by Ivelisse. Rejuvenated Havoc hits two suicide dives and an SSP to retain the titles. Good enough, although it was a given that champs would retain here. 60/100

Cueto is starstruck by the presence of Rey Mysterio. Rey says he’s here beacuase his mentor Dragon Azteca entered this building and never left it… he is dead. Dario says he has nothing to do with it, whatever the beef his father had with Dragon Azteca is in the past, he only wants to make Lucha Underground the best promotion in the world. He offers Rey a drink to honor Azteca’s passing, Mysterio drinks it up.

Mariposa def. Sexy Star

Sexy acted startled around Mariposa and quickly got caught. Kudo Driver plants her, it’s basically a squash match. 34/100

Mack checks on Sexy after the beating, gets kicked around by Marty. Meanwhile Dario praises Matanza and tells him to break Pentagon’s back so he could never bother him again!

Matanza def. Pentagon Jr.

Well, this was a total Brock Lesnar style squash match. Matanza targeted Penta’s back and pinned him after The Wrath of The Gods. 47/100

Vamp runs out to check on Penta, but gets booted in the face. Matanza grabs the fan favorite and puts him through a usually sturdy announcers desk. Stretcher is out, Dario is happy. That’s the last time Penta will have Jr. name in LU.

Show Rating: 57/100 (C-) As expected, it is a cool down show after the big event. Matanza’s reign of terror is scary, not a lot of guys would be pushed as hard as he is here.

SEASON 2, EPISODE 11 (BIRD OF WAR)

Vampiro looks at his meds in the toilet when he’s approached by Dario. Cueto says that Pentagon is lucky to be alive, and tells the commentator not to do the same mistake. Vamp towers over Cueto and could eat him alive, but keeps himself in check and takes some pills like its TicTac.

We’re in the police station where Joey Ryan presents some files on Cueto. The policewoman is on him for some time. Dario is back and he got his brother loose. Ryan says that Dario liked him and put him in a Trios tournament with Cotrez (Reyes Rodriguez outside the Temple) and Cisco. That’s Mr. Cisco… the boss wants them to get closer to Cueto and get the job done.

Ivelisse def. Kobra Moon

A simple womens match with no backstory. Kicks and some submission holds lasted for pretty long actually, but I can’t say that this bout overstayed its welcome. Yoshi Tonic brings Ivy the win, and she’s a Trios champ still. The match itself was a bit slow imo. 48/100

Great backstory for Killshot who enlisted when he turned 18. He was good with the guns, so they made him a sniper. 37 confirmed kills, all bad guys… “or so they told me”. Talks about being captured for months and being able to escape. Did his brothers do the same, where are they now? According to the government they never existed. Now Killshot fights to forget. Awesome!

Famous B meets Mascarita Sagrada backstage to give him his card. He calls Mascarino “Pequeno Tigre Blanco”, perhaps making an intentional mistake, cause in proper Spanish it should be “Tigre Pequeno”. Famous B walks past Sexy Star who is working out. Mack informs her that Dario put him in a Trios team with Moth and Mariposa, so he needs her help. Star refuses, and Mack says that sooner or later they will pay, and he hopes that Sexy will be there to collect. More torture flashbacks, lots of vignettes today.

Joey Ryan and The Crew def. The Mack, Marty The Moth and Mariposa

Interesting match, as both team had rudos and tecnicos. Yes, Cisco is a face now and he fist bumped Mack before fighting him. He upped his workrate a bit here and even got some chants. All in all, this was a fun match where Mack got to shine and Mariposa had some time to showcase her skills. Eventually Mack hits Marty with a Stunner, which is followed by a Shatter Machine! Ryan steals the pin. Enjoyable, really. 65/100

Post match Mariposa kicks Mack until Sexy saves him. She overcame her fear now. Up next is Fenix/Matanza.

Dragon Azteca Jr sits on the roof, telling Rey Mysterio that Matanza killed their master. Mysterio says that revenge is not the right way, he needs to fight for honor. He got them in a Trios tournament and their partner is Prince Puma! He actually has a connection to original DA, so it makes sense. It is an overpowered team for sure. As guys at the MMM show said, Rey is a made man, Puma is close to what Rey was in WCW best days, and Azteca is Rey at the start of his career in AAA. The promo is not so great though, really telling that Rey is the most confident talker in this group.

Matanza def. Fenix

A bit longer than Pentagon’s match, but Matanza still massacred this Fenix boy. Release German Suplex into the ring corner and a massive slam on the outside looked really brutal. Matanza means massacre, good word to describe this match. 53/100

Matanza continues to beat Fenix when he is distracted by Catrina. Mil sneak attacks Matanza, saving Fenix! Unexpected and cool.

Show Rating: 63/100 (C) Better than last week, but still lacking a bit of oomph. Matanza won’t get competitive matches for some time (or not), and the best trios tag teams are yet to participate in the tournament.

SEASON 2, EPISODE 12 (THREE’S A CROWD)

The recap of Fenix and Matanza winning the LU title is opening this show. Dario hosts Johnny, Taya and Cage in his office to talk business. He has an “I’m kind of a big deal” plaque, and goes on to explain that this year’s tournaments is designed to replicate the success of Ivelisse, Angelico and Son of Havoc story. Cage wants to face Mundo instead, but is brushed off. Mundo guesses correctly about Dario’s plan, Taya denies Cueto a handshake and everyone collectively rolls their eyes at Cage saying that he’s a machine. Just win the tournament damn it…

Killshot def. Argentis

Killshot wears a camo and a new mask, looks great. This is his showcase match, and thankfully a beginning of his true LU run. The promotion is great at spotting real talent and changing their booking, it was the same with Pentagon. Great arsenal of moves and a badass and unique gimmick, what’s not to like? 67/100

Black Lotus is guarding Cueto’s office, when Dragon Azteca Jr questions how she can work for him? She says that she would be dead if she didn’t play along and says that Matanza killed their master. She’s a real double agent, but tells DA to keep away from Matanza who is too powerful.

Cueto welcomes a new guy from Mexico to his Temple – Daga. A former cruiserweight champion at AAA will debut soon against Texano and their battle will be for one of the ancient Aztec medallions. Daga is not looking very intimidating to me, and smiles too much this segment. He’s also just in his shorts, his match must be next.

Texano def. Daga

A surprisingly close match, where both mexicans dished out some seriously stiff slaps and kicks. Daga is smaller, but was still believable against the longest reigning AAA champion. Solid debut for Daga, he looked strong and promising there. Texano grabs the first medallion. 71/100

Mil Muertes sniffs the scent of some candles when Catrina tells him that the disciples has gained entry into a Trios tournament and beg for Mil’s forgiveness. Double duty for Argenis, huh? Then Catrina says that Matanza may be more powerful than the earthquake that made Mil, which makes him rage. Funny that she said the exact opposite to Dario.

Rey Mysterio, Prince Puma and Dragon Azteca Jr def. Cage, Taya and Johnny

Rey is so over, he gets all the chants. Cage ruins the slowmo entrance of Taya and Johnny, he has a tendency to destroy things. This is a great bout with non-stop action and plenty of stories intervened in the match. Cage was rough with his tags to Taya and Johnny, Dragon Azteca sold the most, Rey was denied a hot tag, but eventually put the match in the favor of the dream team, and eventually Puma pinned Johnny once again to bring the victory to his unit. Awesome match, totally worth watching! 85/100

To close the show Dario explains why he locks Matanza in the cage… he’s too valuable to lose. He is the only one who appreciates the beauty of the violence Matanza brings. And soon he will bring death to the dead! Matanza shakes the cage like a total psycho.

Show Rating: 78/100 (B) Two good and one great matches make this an awesome episode. The angles and vignettes are always perfect, this show was no exception. It’s interesting that the hunt for medallions and Trios titles is happening at the same time, but more variety in matches is good.

SEASON 2, EPISODE 13 (MONSTER MEETS MONSTER)

Dario has gathered Drago, Fenix and Aerostar in his room. He says he needs one more team in his Trios tournament, and they fit perfectly… oh wait, they were a tag team before, but Drago and Aerostar couldn’t get along. To prevent that, Fenix’s tag partners will be Jack Evans and PJ Black, while Drago and Aerostar will battle for the medallion. You cheeky troll, Cueto.

Aerostar def. Drago

These two know each other inside out and pull off a great opener that would be worthy of a final of their best of 5 series from last season. great high flying moves combined with strikes and chain wrestling, they are great together. Aerostar botches a move and injures his leg in the middle of the match, but still pulls out a couple of very impressive moves to get the medallion in his hands. 79/100

Mundo works out and Taya tells him to take a break, she visited Cueto and got him a match for the Aztec Medallion. Johnny likes that and asks who is his unlucky opponent? That would be Cage. Johnny looks worried for a second and says that’s fine, she will be with him and help even the score, right? Well, not exactly, because it’s going to be a Steel Cage match. Cage in a Cage…

Fenix, Jack Evans and PJ Black def. The Disciples of Death

Very fun trios match wehere Fenix needed to bounce off with a victory. He had a chance to fly and spread his wings, so to speak, when he wasn’t dealing with Evans. Jack is very entertaining, he rejected the tags in the first portion of the match and stole them in other. Very talented indeed, PJ Black does not do enough for me to be a heel, he’s just a performer that leaves all this character work out of his performances, and I don’t mind. Expectedly, Fenix and future Worldwide Underground guys advance to the second round. 76/100

Dario informs current Trios champions that they are in the Trios tournament, it is not made to decide the new number one contenders. The trio is appauled, and spout how unfair it is before arguing what is the official name of their tag team. They get a bye to the finals, at least.

Catrina lashes out on the Disciple of Death, asking them for one good reason not to destroy them all right now. After a little bit Siniestro de la Muerte rips out the hearts of both Trece and Barrio Negro. Quite a visual for former El Mariachi loco, although in kayfabe they are two different people.

Matanza versus Mil Muertes

Two monsters, similar in size and style going at it, with Catrina and Dario looking on. What could go wrong? Unlike Lucha Bros, Mil is holding his own and even punishes Matanza for some time. Both monsters lay hands on Dario and Catrina, but eventualy climb the stairs and brawl among the fans. They finally end up on the gimmicked roof of the office, preparing for the BIG KABOOSH! Both go through the roof, and the fans are going nuts. Dario screams this is war from the roof, I rewatched this moment so many times on first viewing. More to come in the future! Not gonna give this a very high rating, but so far one of the better singles matches for Matanza. 75/100

Great acting by Catrina, by the way. Dario is amazing as always. The show ends on Counsilman Delgado paying a visit to Captain Vasquez and recommends her to drop the case of Dario Cueto. It is not about the mayor, but someone much more powerful. Funny that Alberto, Hernandez and Blue Demon Jr are marked as missing on the wall before it gets covered.

Show Rating: 79/100 (B) Another very strong show with an explosive trios match and a fun opener. The main event was not a squash for once, which is nice. Catrina/Cueto feud is reaching its boiling point, you love to see it.

SEASON 2, EPISODE 14 (CAGE IN A CAGE)

We get straight into the cage match after a recap, no vignettes. Nice cage, with some space to run into the ropes.

Cage def. Mundo – Aztec Medallion Steel Cage Match

Amazing fight! Lots of throws to the walls by both men, and some powerful moves too. Moonlight Drive from the top wasn’t even the most notable high spot. Taya helped Johnny and the match greatly in my opinion, serving some weapons and later getting her ass kicked. End of the World from the top of the cage misses, Taya is cuffed after entering the fight, and Cage puts Mundo away with a Drillclaw on the chair! Wow, what a match. Certainly better than Cuerno/Mundo from season 1 for me. Best Cage match too! For brutal spots and the story it deserves a high rating. 90/100

Second and last match is next, no promos, just Dario coming out to say that Angelico is injured. Ivelisse and Son of Havoc will defend the titles in a handicap essentially.

Dragon Azteca Jr., Prince Puma & Rey Mysterio Jr. def. Ivelisse & Son Of Havoc (c) and Cortez Castro, Joey Ryan & Mr. Cisco and Fenix, Jack Evans & PJ Black – Lucha Underground Trios Title Trios Tournament Final Four Way Elimination Match

Another amazing match! Some would call it a spot fest, like it’s a bad thing, but thus was a super fun bout. Team of Joey Ryan and The Crew was out first after Cortez refused to tag in The Sleazy One. Then Ivelisse was superkicked by PJ after a Yoshi Tonic on Jack for fall #2. Finally Rey, Azteca and Puma turned it to 11 and blew Fenix and his gringo partners out of the water. Rey scores the final fall and we have the new Trios champions! 87/100

The faces celebrate, but the feel good moment is cut short by the only vignette we have for today. Vamp visits thw dojo where Pentagon chills in the wheelchair. Master tells him to get up repeatedly, but he can’t. Tortures him some and after Penta drops on the floor, Vampiro calls him weak. That’s harsh!

Show Rating: 85/100 (B+) Amazing show, but no vignettes apart from the last segment. Enjoyed it from first minute to last, great effort.

SEASON 2, EPISODE 15 (NO MAS)

Dario checks on the ceiling of his office when Catrina walks in. They talk about last week and who destoryed who, which leads Dario to an idea. Muertes versus Matanza in a Grave Consequences match, because he’s so confident that his brother will win. Actually, Cueto says why have 1 coffin when you can have four? Catrina says she likes how Dario thinks and accepts the challenge.

Mack def. Marty “The Moth” Martinez – Aztec Medallion match

Mack dominates and gets an easy win over Moth. He’s getting strong creepy bastard chants and is very commied to his charachter. This wasn’t the best match to open the show with, not very competitive. Two Stunners is enough to put Marty away. 53/100

Catrina tells Cuerno that tonight he will face her disciple, Siniestro de la Muerte. Last week two other guys were written off, so Siniestro has a mini-push. Cuerno is not worried as much, and says that he will not make the mistake he did before and cash in at first opportunity.

Sexy enters Dario’s office and he immediately lights up, telling her al about his childhood and the tortures his mother inflicted on him and Matanza until they stood up. Cueto puts Sexy in a No Mas match against Mariposa, and it will also be for the Aztec medallion.

Siniestro de la Muerte def. King Cuerno

Well, the result totally sucks. Cuerno dominates and then he gets hit by Catrina’s stone. Flying Leg Drop is enough to beat the hunter… bad. 31/100

Mascarita lifts some serious weight backstage and Famous B tells his little star that he got him a match with the owner of the medallion! Stop bawling, starl balling! Love them.

Chavo Guerrero demands a medallion, but doesn’t get a chance to compete for one because he blew every chance he ever got in LU. Chavo says ok, he will seize an opportunity, no problem.

Cage def. Mascarita Sagrada

Weird to see a babyface Cage beating up Mascarita here. Sagrada got a bit of offence, but was put down with an F10… if that is a thing. Matches are not good tonight, ore are they? 25/100

Ah, Cage’s medallion is stolen by Chavo, that’s why the beating happened. You got robbed, or as Vampiro would say, karma is a biatch…

Sexy Star def. Mariposa – No Mas match for Aztec Medallion

Well, this is a classic match with lots of memorable moments, it is full of emotions and people are into it. Absolutely insane drama, and innovative spots. Con-chair-to-the-crotch, little bit of teasing on the roof, balde job from Sexy, unique submission holds from Mariposa and of course a LEGENDARY moment that still gives me goosebumps. I rewatched it so many times!

Marty interfered twice, but each time was swatted away by Mack’s Stunners. Sexy wins via armbar, and keeps it on after the match because Dario told her to! What a story. While this was not a classic catch as can wrestling contest, it was a freaking fight and then some. It is a memorable and fun match, and for that I’ll give it a high rating. 85/100

Too high? Probably. Even if you don’t like Sexy, Mariposa deserves some respect. Post match Mack gifts bloody Sexy her medallion, good moment.

Show Rating: 70/100 (C+) Overall it was not good, but the main event stole the show. The show was probably built like that intentionally, so No Mas match would stand out even more. I don’t mind.

SEASON 2, EPISODE 16 (GRAVER CONSEQUENCES)

Cueto meets up at the bar with Counsilman Delgado, gives him some mysterious package and prepares to leave, but he’s held back. Delgado tells him that he might have a rat in The Temple, and he’s investigated by the po-po. No way… yes way. Counsilman also says that when the descencion of his boss is complete, he will come pay a personal visit. He’s been waiting for a very long time. “Did you think your brother was going to have all the fun?”

Joey Ryan def. Castro and Mr. Cisco – Aztec Medallion match

A nothing match. Ryan got kicked out, The Crew wrestled each other for a minute, roll up, that’s it. Don’t like this match. Ryan puts the medallion in his trunks… 21/100

Catrina is 197 years old at least… looks great! Tells about how she giuded Mil to safety when he was a little boy. Ctarina wants Mil to put Matanza in his coffin, she wants to lick the God too. Make up your mind, woman. Awesome promo, Cuerno steps out of the shadows, he was watching them!

Trios title on the line next, and ex-champs Ivelisse and Son of Havoc have to welcome a new member into their ranks, as Angelico is still injured. Johnny Mundo, who’s in pink pants…

Dragon Azteca Jr., Prince Puma & Rey Mysterio Jr. (c) defeat Ivelisse, Johnny Mundo & Son Of Havoc (w/Taya) – Lucha Underground Trios Title Match

Azteca works with Ivelisse, Rey with Son of Havoc, and Puma with Mundo. Not a bad match, good action. Rey now wears a more traditional mask and he also funnily pointed out the size of his own beard when wrestling Havoc. Son of Havoc takes the fall, Mundo kicked Ivelisse in the face, which didn’t help. Can you believe that Johnny still never was a champion? Crazy. 67/100

Taya beats up Ivelisse some more, Johnny blames her for the loss but he’s not very sad about missing out on the Trios titles. Up next is the main event!

Matanza Cueto def. Mil Muertes – Graver Consequences Luch Underground Championship match

Well, this was bowling shoe ugly. Lots of brawling and bumps on hard coffins, brutal spots. Mil got his mask ripped up, then got blasted by a ring post hook. Flatliner on the coffins was painful to watch. This was rather slow, compared to a Fenix match, plus not a lot of selling was shown. Catrina slapped Cueto, but got hit by a chair to the back. Matanza threw her in one of the coffins, then slammed Muertes into one to win the match. The magic of the first gimmick match wasn’t present here for me, but it was still a notable match. 77/100

Catrina disappeared from the coffin after the match (probably had a backdoor and hid under the ring) and Muertes was carried away by druids, one of which was Cuerno.

We end this episode on counsilman shitting his jocks at the sight of THE LORD, the most powerful man to walk down the Earth. As a long-time viewer I know who it will be, not sure the guy was planned all along though.

Show Rating: 73/100 (B-) I feel like I’m harsh on the main event, but neither Matanza nor Mil are here to deliver 5 star matches, right? The Lord gets more and more mentions. Will drink up everytime there’s a reference to him on the screen.

SEASON 2, EPISODE 17 (CRIME AND PUNISHMENT)

This episode starts with a 10 minute segment involving all the participants in the Gift of the Gods title match – Texano, Siniestro de la Muerte, Mack (circles to circles, way to go), Joey Ryan, Sexy Star, Aerostar and Chavo… Cage stood in the ring, waiting for the weasel that stole his medallion, but Guerrero outsmarted him and put the thing in the belt first. Cage has been bamboozled! He falttens Chavo like a pancake with Weapon X for a modicum of revenge.

Daga def. Mascarita Sagrada, Kobra Moon and Argenis

Argenis never wins, is he? The obvious favorite here is Daga who plays a role of a pretty boy? I don’t know about that, but ok. The match is nothing special, and Kobra allows Daga to pin Mascarita and expresses her affection to the man. Mkay. 44/100

Marty mocks Killshot backstage and says they got a match tonight, then gets slapped around and laughs on the ground. The match is next!

Killshot def. Marty “The Moth” Martinez

This was a surprisingly open match, and it had enough time to develop. Marty gets stronger with every episode, and slowly rising through the ranks. Killshot kicks out of the Curb Stomp, and hits Moth with his new finisher to pick up the win. He needs to be featured more! 62/100

Post match Moth snaps and attacks Killshot to steal his dog tags. A great feud kicks off, they will have some wars in the future.

Chavo Guerrero Jr. defeats Aerostar and El Siniestro de la Muerte and Joey Ryan and Sexy Star and Texano and The Mack – Gift Of The Gods Title Seven Way Match

So the multi man matches in Lucha Underground are always fun, and this was ok too, even with the squad being second rate, with all due respect. It was going well, but then people ganged up on Chavo, prompting Cage to show up and DESTROY everyone. For some bizarre reason he lays out everyone and drags Guerrero over Ryan’s body. People don’t like it, Cage is a heel once again? He’s selfish, we figured that out. 60/100

Cage then reveals that he spoke to Dario, and Chavo will retain his newly won title against him! Guerrero does not want to do anything with the title now. Like holding it to challenge Matanza would somehow be any better.

Pentagon is hanging on some BDSM set up, Vamp is torturing him here. He beats Penta with a kendo stick, telling him to shut up – only the weak experience pain and show emotions. Vamp says Ian Hodgkinson thought he could control him, but nah… and now he will break Pentagon again. Vamp unveils a barbed wire bat and before he connects we cut off. Very nice vignette!

Show Rating: 64/100 (C) Chavo is starting to get X-Pac heat from me. Is he a good heel? Yes, but he shouldn’t be a champion on this roster. I like Cage though, and I guess he never was a babyface. Pentagon’s angle is amazing, can’t wait for him to return. Also miss pouty-lipped Fenix, he did not appear in a long time.

SEASON 2, EPISODE 18 (ENTER THE MUNDO)

Pentagon is walking again and wants to return to the Temple, but Vamp says he is not ready yet. Penta throws a punch, but ends up in a wrist lock. Nobody is a patient student in LU.

Joey Ryan def. Mascarita Sagrada

Joey Ryan does Joey Ryan things, Mascarita is super over. Pretty good comedy match, but nothing more. I don’t know why they had to give the victory to the sleazebag. 43/100

Taya now gets a Perfect Woman gimmick, in this vignette she dispatches some luchabronies in a dress. She drives Mundo away on a Lambo. Don’t remember this actually…

Cuerno talks to Mil in the glass coffin, telling him that he sat on his throne like the king of the jungle, but he forgot that HE is the only king around. No matter how mighty the lion is, he will fall and be just another piece on his wall. Badass promo, I like Cuerno, which makes me feel worse about his booking sometimes.

Cage def. Chavo Guerrero

Perhaps Chavo’s best match in LU. It is good, but when you think about it, stupidly pointless. Why not give Cage a title in a 7-way? Why give time to Chavo when Fenix and Killshot get little air time? Cage wins with a Drill Claw. 71/100

Cage wins and immediately challenges Matanza for the title next week. Cage is very popular, and deserves his rub.

Speaking of people who don’t get their minutes, Fenix was attacked by Evans, PJ and Taya. Johnny once again will step into a Trios title match? His alliance with Cueto is really strong.

Joey Ryan and Cortez Castro go through Dario’s things looking for evidence, but they are cut short by Cisco. He is about to tell the boss, but before that he gets arrested. Poor Cisco.

Worldwide Underground def. Rey Mysterio, Azteca Jr, Puma

This was another good trios match with 6 very talented guys in the ring. Did not expect the titles to change hands, but Mundo was overdue for some gold in LU. Taya is a great valet (and a kickass luchadora) while PJ and Jack are good sidekicks. Lots of kicks below the belt, no VAR. Mundo could have pinned Puma, but after another set of shenanigans, now with a chair, he pins Dragon Azteca. Rematch coming soon? 74/100

Show rating: 65/100 (C) Not a bad show, but it lacked something extra. Congrats to Mundo and Cage on their first LU titles.

SEASON 2, EPISODE 19 (JUDGEMENT DAY)

Recap of Cage and Mundo winning their titles, good for them. The opener is promising!

Son of Havoc def. Daga

Son of Havoc back to singles action with a good match and win. Daga does not light the house on fire with his offence, but he’s certainly not bad. He’s not too stiff with his strong style, but can fly ok. During the match Kobra Moon came out to hiss seductively at him, even her interference didn’t help the young man. Havoc is not even backed up by Ivelisse, shame. 65/100

Kobra wants that dagger, but the boy doesn’t want none. Give him time…

Dragon Azteca Jr found the cell where they keep Matanza and wants some vengeance, but Rey is wiser and tells him to think about the Trios titles. Puma came up and asked what the argument is all about, with Mysterio saying it’s none of his business. Harsh, but they leave together. The tension between two of the biggest heroes is clear.

Worldwide Underground def. Rey Mysterio, Prince Puma, Dragon Azteca by DQ

A continuation of last week’s main event, I guessed right about the rematch. It’s also a very good match with a lot of cool spots, such as Superplex to the outside on the crowd of people. Worldwide Underground wrestled in bandanas and sunglasses for the first portion of the match, and went back to their low blowing (not like that) ways here. It went on and on until Puma had a rage quit, kicking Mundo in the huevos, causing an immediate DQ. What about leniency, Marty Elias? 68/100

Puma is super angry, even superkicks Taya. He’s held down by Rey, and that’s a seed, brother.

Right after the bout Dragon Azteca visits Matanza, but is stopped by Black Lotus. BUT HE KILLED YOUR PARENTS… no, Dragon Azteca did. Why? Dario said so, that guy is super trustworthy and yeah, you’re not him. Strange tidbit. Dragon Azteca is a promising wrestler, but he is not a good actor.

Matanza def. Cage

Woah, what a great fight. Underrated match for sure, Cage showed what he can do here. Started off with some flippy shit after realizing two brutes just cancel out each other, then they brawled on the outside for a bit, then just threw everything but a kitchen sink at each other moves wise. No weapons needed when you’re that jacked… There was a moment in the match where they traded Germans without selling them, even that was somewhat cool. Really enjoyable fight, Cage brought his A game here, making Fenix and Pentagon look like weakilng’s kayfabe wise. 88/100

Show Rating: 79/100 (B) The main event was badass, Cage is an actual MACHINE. Daga needs to throw more potatoes, his debut was more fun than the second match.

SEASON 2, EPISODE 20 (THE CONTENDERS)

Black Lotus wonders why she stopped Dragon Azteca from killing Matanza, she has doubts about the whole thing. Dario keeps playing his game, saying that Ultima Lucha is coming and she will have a chance to take the mask of disciple of the man who killed her parents.

Marty The Moth vs. Killshot

A heated brawl on the outside was quite brutal, but ref decided to count them both out. Not sure how to rate this… it serves a purpose, so not a total waste of time. 40/100

Killshot gets his hands on dog tags, but Marty still runs off with them.

Cisco sits in the camera, spits at Castro for being a rat. I THOUGHT WE WERE FRIENDS! Captain Vasquez lists all his wrongdoings and pushes him into getting wired up to get the lynchpin to the end of days, Dario, in her hands.

Aerostar and Drago def. PJ Black and Jack Evans – Nunchuks match

This was so fun. The tornado tag rules seriously refreshed this, there were a lot of trios matches lately, plus all four guys can fly and did just that here. Add nunchaks to the mix that slapped hard, and you get yourself a very good bout. Wasn’t sure about this one before, probably no need to see it again, but for a one off it was brilliant. 83/100

Coming up next is a huge 6 on 6 match. The competitors step out, the last one is Chavo. Penta rolls out on the scooter, thanks Chavito for helping him back in the day, then breaks his arm to take his spot in the match. Expected a louder reaction for Penta… he gets it after the commercial, whew.

Fenix, Ivelisse, Johnny Mundo, King Cuerno, Pentagon Jr. & Taya defeat Prince Puma, Rey Mysterio Jr., Sexy Star, Son Of Havoc, Texano & The Mack

You can never go wrong when you book some of the best people on your roster in a multiman match, at least not for my liking. I like spotfests. Amazing performance, even if lacking psychology. It’s fun, and insane too. The jump off near the end was cool, and Mundo drove the vedge between Puma and Rey by pinning his arch rival. Ultima Lucha card shapes up nicely… 85/100

Mil was left all alone in Cuerno’s cabin, so Catrina raised the stone and Muertes has risen again, breaking the glass with his head! Now he’s with stitches on his mask, badass.

Show Rating: 83/100 (B+) Very fun episode, two great matches. Plus Catrina and Mil are back…

SEASON 2, EPISODE 21 (SIX TO SURVIVE)

The one match shows are amazing. This was no different!

Pentagon Jr. defeats Fenix and Ivelisse and Johnny Mundo and King Cuerno and Taya

Absolutely great match that gave us Johnny Mundo, Fenix and Pentagon slagging it out for quite some time. Taya and Ivelisse were great too, Cuerno was eliminated early through Mil who now also wears red contact lenses. I would recommend you to go watch this brothetly war between Fenix and Penta, they stole the season here. Pentagon wins after the Mexican Destroyer off the second rope, transitioned into a Package Piledriver. Yeah. 93/100

It’s Matanza vs Penta for Ultima Lucha Dos. Shut up and take my money.

Show Rating: 87/100 (B+) No vignettes this time, but the match got some serious time. LU is in its peak right now and I enjoy every minute of it.

SEASON 2, EPISODE 22 (FAME AND FORTUNE)

Speaking of vignettes, Dario just signed The Nightclaw! He looks so cool and comes from the same tribe as Prince Puma. He gets a medallion as a signing bonus. Cueto also says that his tribe was the first one to be destroyed due to overconfidence, interesting.

Daga def. Mascarita Sagrada

This match does no favors to Daga’s strong style reputation. No disrespect to Sagrada, its just that Daga can’t showcase his skills against him as easily. Kobra Moon is stalking him, he wins the medallion that has a snake on it. 32/100

Famous B is fed up with Mascarita losing all the time so a superkick and a whipping by a shoe come afterwards. Manager promises to find a new client that will be famous…

Dario reveals to Azteca that Black Lotus killed his mentor, not Matanza. Just look her in the eyes. Cueto books them in a match for Ultima Lucha… the angle had this hypnothic effect, Dario is a top-tier shit-stirrer.

El Siniestro de la Muerte, Killshot & Marty Martinez defeat Cortez Castro, Joey Ryan & Mr. Cisco

Cisco turned face so organically… he busts out a bunch of high flying moves, what a lad. Killshot and Marty work well together, Moth even offered ex-soldiers his tags back for the duration of the match. Curb Stomp to Doube Foot Stomp, they win. 64/100

Sexy Star and Mariposa def. Taya and Ivelisse – Parejas Increibles

Well this was pretty good. Action was solid and the story of all four women disliking each other was used well too. Good dynamics and the winners, and the gimmick of the match is fresh for LU. 68/100

Final segment of the night is a rare one… Puma has an open mic, addressing his hometown crowd for the first time ever. He is not the best on the stick, but he talks from the heart. He says Konnan always told him he could be the best, he could be the next Rey Mysterio. So it’s time for jim to know if he’s better. Rey answer the call and accepts, the dream match is on. “You might be the prince, but i’m El Rey” is a money line. Both shake hands and pose.

Show Rating: 67/100 (C+) You have to calm the crowd down a bit before blowing the roof with Ultima Lucha, so I have no problem with this episode.

SEASON 2, EPISODE 23 (PHOENIX, DRAGON AND SPACEMAN)

Striker and Vamp inform us that Dario booked Worldwide Underground in a title defence against Superfriends Aerostar, Drago and Fenix! It’s nice to see that Fenix can get his revenge on Johnny.

And now it’s a grudge match.

King Cuerno def. Mil Muertes

Cuerno doesn’t get an entrance, while Mil is rocking new eyes. Catrina wears a lipstick that matches the color of Mil’s eyes, nice touch. Muertes steps up his camera shoving game a notch, and chases Cuerno around. An Arrow from the Depths of Hell takes out Mil and ref Borden, so “The Hunter” gets a chair and bashes Mil right in his dome! No sell, punch straight to the face. Muertes sets a chair in the corner and of course runs into it himself seconds later. King with a roll up while hanging on to the rope, sneaky win. 64/100

Up next is Fenix against Mundo for the first time ever! A match worthy of a main event spot at Ultima Lucha, no?

Dario greets ladies Ivelisse and Taya and offers them a drink. He wants to know who’s the baddest… woman in the Temple, so he books them in a match at Ultima Lucha! Ivelisse downs a glass of scotch (or whiskey, I’m not an alcohol guy to know) and meets Catrina in the corridor, they trade some words and ex-proprietor demands a rematch for Mil from Dario, who laughs at her. But then she says she wants a Death match and Cueto gets a booking boner. “I hate you, but you know what to say to get me excited!”

Here’s something else to get you excited, pervs.

Prince Puma defeats Dragon Azteca Jr. (w/Rey Mysterio Jr.)

The best high flyer against the most promising one? Amazing match and it was evenly matched, lots of faith in DAJ, and he backs it up in the ring. Puma is stronger, and more experienced, plus Rey would never interfere in such a tidy match. Prince showed up his more dirty sides here, throwing DAJ in the ring post once. Very cool match, it’s not very long but jam-packed with action. 84/100

Dario gathered Cage, Texano, Son of Havoc and Mack in the ring. They don’t have a match yet, can you believe it? Cueto says he feels like a kid on Christmas, so in the spirit of that feelings, he’s starting a tournament called For a Unique Opportunity. Get it? GET IT? For and Four, haha, yeah. Cage takes the upper hand in a little brawl, still to come is our main event.

Johnny Mundo (w/Taya) def. Fenix

This had the potential to be insanely good and steal the show, but unlike Puma, Johnny doesn’t mind going all out rudo. Taya distracts and interferes here a lot, and Mundo knocks the bird (Fenix, not Taya) with the title shot. Get it? Okay, I wanted to see more from them, but saving it for Ultima Lucha is also ok. It’s kickass, but not the best match of the night. Better than the opener though. 76/100

Evans and PJ join the winners to stomp on Fenix, but he’s helped out by Aerostar and Drago plus Ivelisse, who throws out La Wera Loca.

Show Rating: 85/100 (B+) Good go-home show, if not great. 3 special matches that could easily main event any show. Pentagon and Matanza didn’t get any story development though, maybe next episode?

SEASON 2, EPISODE 24 (ULTIMA LUCHA DOS, PART 1)

Look who’s in the ring – the boys that opened up Ultima Lucha last season – Cage and Mack! Dario rocks his best suit and says that last time they started the special event with a bang, so he wants nothing less, and once again makes it a Falls Count Anywhere match! RING THE BELL!!

Mack def. Cage – Falls Count Anywhere

This is my kind of match! Trash cans, toolboxes, brawl in Dario’s office, suplex on the bleachers, ungimmicked guitar shot (looking at you, Jeff Jarrett), beers and Stunners! Just a crazy brawl that had the fans on their feet the entire time. Frog Splash from the balcony on the table right next to Striker!! Even that is not enough! Cage finds the cinderblock once again, but can’t Curb Stomp the Mack, slipping on the beer. Roll up, and we have a winner!! Love this one. I think it’s on the level of the first one, if not better. 89/100

You thought that was crazy? Hold on to your beer, cause we have a Bar Brawl!

Son of Havoc def. Texano – Bar Room Brawl

They are just going insane with their brawls at this point, and I’m here to witness it. Texano gained my respect in this match, he took NASTY bumps on the actual bar filled with glass, on the legs of the bar stools, on the keg of beer, and finally on the broken beer bottle glass. Texano, you are one crazy bastard! Another brawl that gets two thumbs up from me, people once again were on their feet. Best match for both men in LU at this point? 86/100

Dario admits that he planned a Cage/Texano finals, but they did impress him. So muhc, that he also makes this a falls count anywhere match! That’s too much, I think.

Son of Havoc def. The Mack – 4 a Unique Opportunity Final

Credit for GIFs goes to CubsFan, he’s awesome

After the first two matches, this wasn’t even remotely insane, just a good little match between two good boys. No weapons used, more high fly, and I can’t rag on them for putting a safer match after already featuring earlier. Still, a bit of a let down. 66/100

Dario congratulates Son of Havoc on winning, and offers him two briefcases. Black Lotus opens one, where $250.000 are waiting for the biker. In the second one, there’s a contract for a Ultima Lucha Tres main event. Havoc chooses the main event! Dario is not impressed, so he says that Havoc has to win one more match, and the money will go to his next opponent if this mysterious fighter wins. Havoc’s contract is also on the line. Feeeeck you, Cueto. Famous B comes out to present us a new client… slick reveal, not gonna lie.

Dr. Wagner Jr. def. Son of Havoc

It looked like Son of Havoc would be able to pull it off, but he missed a Shooting Star Press and Doctor capitalized with a Doctor Driver. I can’t give this match a high rating, it was short, it was unfair to Havoc in storyline, and it didn’t lead anywhere big. Just like Blue Demon Jr, Dr. Wagner gets a win in a short match that didn’t have to happen. 35/100

Famous B and Brenda fawn over Wagner and the money. A real downer to the first part…

Final Rating: 77/100 (B-) An event spoiled by another curveball from Cueto. Plus the final was hampered because of the two matches that took place earlier. Respect to Son of Havoc but man, that’s a Boyle Heights Screwjob if I ever saw one. Felt like a standalone episode, and really had no vignettes to progress all the other storylines.

SEASON 2, EPISODE 25 (ULTIMA LUCHA DOS, PART 2)

Judging from the recaps and the words of commentators, we will get two matches tonight – a Gift of the Gods title match and a Death match between Mil and Cuerno.

The only guy to get a special entrance is the debuting Night Claw. He looks great, and puts the last medallion in the belt to enter officially.

Sexy Star defeats Daga and El Siniestro de la Muerte and Killshot and Marty Martinez and Night Claw and The Mariposa – Gift Of The Gods Title Seven Way Elimination Match

This was a very good match, I was supporting Killshot and Nightclaw here. The first one gone was obviously Siniestre de la Muerte, he has nothing to offer in this line up. Daga looked promising at the start, but got eliminated second. He needed some help with his booking, but didn’t get one. All he can count on is the romance angle with Kobra Moon.

My boy Klllshot eliminated Night Claw after he leaped off the top of the roof with a Moonsault! Great debut, but sadly, Killshot himself would be eliminated soon by Mariposa after her Butterfly Effect finishing maneuver. Marty keeps the dog tags in his trunks, and the twisted family members team up to take out Sexy. She ducks a punch, and Mariposa is out, shame… lastly, Sexy Star overcomes the wrath of the Moth, tapping him out in an Armbar, very symbolic. She wins her first gold in LU, people are on her side, and judging by her reaction it means a lot to her. Oh how the tables will turn very soon… have nothing bad to say about the match itself. 79/100

Francisco is wired up and he freaks out, what if Dario finds out? What if he kills him? Relax, he won’t kill you. Do the job, and all charges will be cleared. Yeah, don’t be so confident, guys.

Mil Muertes (w/Catrina) def. King Cuerno – Death Match

This was intense, and it had a lot of weapons. They fought all over the arena, even paying a visit to the band on the balcony. Mil dominated the match, and King only got occasional flashes. His Suicide Dive was on point tonight, flew almost into the chairs. Cuerno made the mistake of touching Catrina, which prompted Mil to spear the hunter through the table, and go on a 3-peat of Powerbomb through the wood. Mil picked up the crowbar, smacked it into the back of his opponent’s head, added a Tombstone Piledriver, and that was all she wrote, dude. Muertes wins once again at Ultima Lucha. Solid match, but it didn’t have the magic of Fenix or sheer fun to it like Cage/Mack. Just a good old brawl. 82/100

Cuerno is stretched out, while Striker asks Vamp about the Penta/Matanza match. Vamp doesn’t answer, just pours his pills in the bin and goes off, to get his student ready for some war.

We end this episode on Mr. Cisco is trying to get into Dario’s good favors. He’s too sweaty when he asks for some errands, and can’t lie for shit. Cueto realsies this is the rat Delgado was talking about, and tells him to unbutton. What do they want me for? Murder? No? Well, they do now.

Dario bashes Cisco to death with a bull statue and picks up the phone to say that it’s time.

Joey Ryan and Cortez Castro are shocked, their boy is donskeys.

Show Rating: 80/100 (B) Another solid night of Ultima Lucha, big win for yet-to-be-loathed Sexy Star and Mil. Cisco is dead, shame. The guy will resurface though, and his soul will inhibit the body of a funky animal, it’s gonna be great.

SEASON 2, EPISODE 26 (ULTIMA LUCHA DOS, PART 3)

The end of the S2 is here, and it starts with a recap of all the major storylines that happened this season. Amazing footage and storytelling, the power of long-term booking is on display here. And then, Vamp asks if Pentagon is ready for the Monster? Penta thinks that he is, but that’s not true. He has to face his fears in the cave… Penta steps in and is ambushed by a dozen of other Pentagon’s in a nightmare for anyone who has epilepsy tendencies. Penta lays waste to his fear and takes down Vamp, whose face is painted like it’s Pentagon’s. At the end, Vamp tells the man with no fear to blow out a candle, so Pentagon Dark could come to life. AWESOME! I don’t remember this at all, and watched like it was something out of season 5, not season 2.

Aerostar, Drago & Fenix defeat The Worldwide Underground (Jack Evans, Johnny Mundo & PJ Black) (c) – Lucha Underground Trios Title Match

This was everything you would expect from six athletes of this caliber and some more. A lot of pokes in the butt from Jack Evans, what about that? Aerostar with some of the most innovative spots, and the overall pace is dizzying. So fast and risky their offence is, but Worldwide Underground take out the ref and play air guitar on their belts, triple teaming poor Fenix. He endures, Drago flies too, but it is the returning Angelico who puts the end to Mundo’s cheating ways, bashing him with a crutch to the head, a couple of times too! That’s what you get when there’s no Taya, huh? I was very happy to see Angelico, he’s awesome. The superheroes capitalized on his arrival and won the Trios titles in a great bout. Fenix is now the first Triple Crown LU champion, a very deserving performer to achieve that accolade. 87/100

Dragon Azteca Jr. def. Black Lotus by DQ

So this is a match, and not a bad one, by any means. Lotus held herself well, showing off some nice moves, and Azteca was professional and skillful enough to help her look better than she really is. They had some good flying and fighting, but then a certain Pentagon Dark ran in to attack first Azteca, and then Lotus. Broke her arm, Vampiro is cheesing it so hard. Decided to make it even, and broke Azteca’s arm too! He’s on the rampage. I get that he broke the arm of Lotus, who’s been with Cueto for some time now, but Azteca seems to be in the wrong place in the wrong time, no? Oh, the match rating. A bit on the lower side, but it’s not the fault of the fighters. 53/100

After a commercial, Pentagon has a stick. He says that last year he defeated his master here, in a Cero Miedo match. But he wasn’t ready, and Matanza destroyed and humiliated him. So, together with his teacher, penta scoured the darkest places on the Earth to face his true fears… and now Pentagon Jr is dead. Long live… Pentagon DARK. Vamp looks like a proud papa and throws a Cero Miedo gesture. Penta demands a title match right now!

Matanza (w/Dario Cueto) def. Pentagon Dark – Anything Goes

I wonder how Dario felt by being forced to come out for a match on a whim of some of his wrestlers. He’s the boss, no? Pentagon looks very lively here, and dominates for a long time, throwing chairs full force at Matanza. Hopefully the mask is thick enough to protect the brains, sheesh.

He himself gets into a chair jammed between the ropes once, but Matanza suffers more. Striker can’t switch to Pentagon Dark quick enough, which makes Vampiro a bit cranky. He sits there and enjoys the beating, then walks up to his pupil and gifts him a barbed wire bat! Penta intends to use it, but Dario shoves him away, then tries to weasel out, almost getting his arm broken. Matanza picks up the bat, smacks it across Penta’s back and slams him down with a Wrath of the Gods maneuver.

I feel like people got disappointed by the result, and that the re-debut had to start with a big win, but no, we got what we got here. It was the right decision to keep the title on Matanza, he was so dominant all season. Not the match of the year, but a damn good fight. 84/100

Post match fans indeed chant BULLSHIT and Penta lashes out at his master, but doesn’t destroy him for now. Vamp then takes his medication and recovers mentally in the beginning of the next match.

Taya def. Ivelisse

So that’s why they gave Taya that “Perfect Woman” vignette, so she could have a nickname, as this was almost billed as that. As most of you know, Ivelisse goes by “The Baddest Bitch in the Building”, so this was a battle to determine who’s in fact the best woman, so to say. By the way, Taya is higher on the card than Johnny, that’s cool. There was a lot of catfighting here, and not a lot of straight up wrestling, which can be explained of course. The finish came after Catrina appeared out of nowhere to drop some cool looking but funny move on Ivelisse. Northern Lights Suplex, Double Foot Stomp, Taya beats Ivelisse again and effectively wins this feud. Catrina rocks a new outfit, that’s a nice one. The match is okay, but nothing out of this world, or should I say, nothing out of this mundo? 57/100

Ivy is unresponsive, Catrina says this… “Death comes to everyone, even you, bitch.” Nice delivery, she’s schooling it, as Vampiro would say. And now it’s time for your main event of the evening. 323 vs 619, The Prince vs. The King, Prince Puma vs. Rey Mysterio. Great video package to wrap it all up and send us out with a bang.

Rey Mysterio def. Prince Puma

Dream match it was, and I think nobody could have gotten a better match from Mysterio here, except Morrison. This was a well constructed match, they didn’t need any gimmicks, and seldomly pushed each other, never overstepping the honor boundaries. Puma of course was familiar with most of Rey’s moves, and got some new ones for himself ahead of this bout. It went for quite a bit, and it never shifted gears down. Props to Rey for showing he can hang with the best, and in kayfabe, proving he’s still the best. 619, West Coast Pop and some other big moves from the top moves were effective and believable enough.

At the first viewing I remember being confused why Rey didn’t put over the young star, the face of Lucha Underground, but I think now, a couple years later I understand why. This was a gesture of appreciation to Rey, who brought lucha libre to the US, the team wanted Mysterio to know how much he meant to them. Perhaps I’m talking out of one place, perhaps not. Rey sticks around, and he put over other guys before. He’s not that horrifically old or anything, he’s still looking good in 2020. All in all, certainly the best Rey match in LU. For Puma though, it’s not the best one. It’s up there, but it does not come close to the All Night Long match. Perhaps it’s closer to Mil/Puma… actually, Prince is 0-2! Didn’t realize it until now, and knowing how the show develops, it’s actually interesting.

The rating… was this the best match of Ultima Lucha Dos? In a classic sense yes, but I enjoyed some other matches a bit more. Still, for importance, name value, and storyline, this has to be an A. 92/100

Striker and Vampiro thank us for a great season and are ready to wrap it up, when Pentagon shows up to superkick Matt into oblivion and massacre Vamp with a barbie bat. Jams it straight into his forehead, it’s really bloody. Pentagon says that now he is the master, effectively dropping out of Vamp’s school of dark arts.

The last shot of the season is not Pentagon licking Vamp’s blood though, it is focused on Dario Cueto, who has been caught and put into a wagon, presumably heading to prison. He’s down for a bit, but at the end he flashes a smile, that beautiful smile. To be continued…

Show Rating: 87/100 (B+) It has been a great season, and it gave us a strong ending that developed a lot of stories, plus it explains why LU has an off season – it’s promoter is about to be jailed. First season Dario was on the run, now he’s been caught. The matches had a lot of screwy finishes, and only the main event gave us a clear and decisive winner, perhaps a wrong one, at that.

A lot of people were disappointed by the title match, and I can see where they are coming from. The finish was underwhelming, and the title deserved to be defended in the main event. Imagine if Puma lost the title to Rey in the main event, that could mean so much more than just a dream match. Plus Pentagon/Matanza could have got a different finish, but I get it, Matanza is an asset and you don’t just put him out a couple of times.

As of now, the main guys in the Temple are Mil and Rey. That’s one feud that could have been huge, maybe it was in place and I just keep forgetting things, but hey, that’s a great thing when you’re watching Lucha Underground.

SEASON 3, EPISODE 1 (WHEEL OF MISFORTUNE)

Season 3 starts with a great film that shows us Dario making chin ups. Wow Cueto, you can do more than one, I wouldn’t have guessed. Honky Tonk Man (what a bizarre cameo) gives El Jefe his shit back, and Dario proudly wears a bigass key on his neck, making Honky raise his eyebrow. Dario is picked up by counsilman and The Lord, who promises Cueto death if he wastes his time again, all in Spanish. Dario is not THAT scared, but still serious. Temple is back in business, baby. Btw, Lord has a gauntlet on his hand.

Striker welcomes us back and says its good to see Vamp rested and healthy. Vamp clarifies that he’s not Pentagon’s master anymore. Ok.

Dario opens the show with Matanza already standing. Jefe is pumped and wants to announce tonight’s super main event – Rey Mysterio vs Pentagon! Huge indeed, Dario says he hates Pentagon, but that fucker redeemed himself by bringing us some violence and bleeding Vamp like a pig. Cueto oinks at the announcer, damn dawg. Boss hypes up how dominant his bro is and introduces us to Dario’s Dial of Doom, a wheel with potential opponent on it. It lands on Son of Havoc, which makes Cueto smirk. You know, he screwed him hard at Ultima Lucha…

Matanza def. Son of Havoc

Surprisingly not a squash, but a valiant performance by the biker. He was on top of his game here and unloaded all his moves. Still not enough to defeats the monster. Havoc works super safe, he almost lacked some edge here. It was different in his Bar Brawl with Texano. 72/100

Mundo and his Worldwide Underground buddies go to Dario. Mundo demands a title shot, but gets denied. They lost the trios gold! Mundo says only because of Angelico, but now they have taken care of him. The footage rolls in where they gang up our Angelico boy, and Mundo breaks his leg with a car door. Brutal, Cueto laughs with them, still says no title shot against Matanza. Mundo wants Sexy then, and Cueto points out that only Taya won, so she’ll get that match. Fine then, the dudes roll out.

Ivelisse says she lost twice at Ultima Lucha because of Catrina, and that made her want her first UL win bad. Ahe also wants to bash Catrina’s skull into the ground. Catrina says bring it on, bitch. First episode, we already have the first match. Has to be said that this episode was taped late for some reason.

Sexy Star def. Taya

First ever title defence for the Gift of the Gods? Taya gets a rep for being the top female worker, people sleep on Mariposa a bit, but I’m not disagreeing Taya’s good. They have an ok bout, and Sexy rolls her up after Mundo and the boys tried to cheat. 51/100

Massive beat down by WU, Star rescued by Trios champs Fenix, Drago and Aerostar.

Moth interrupts Jefe’s call. He asks if he got the presents, Cueto confirms, but wants him to know that he’s innocent and that was just an unfortunate vacation. Dario then says Marty will get Killshot in a Weapon of Mass Destruction match next week. Moth gets all excited and bites the dog tags, with Dario being like wtf is wrong with this lunatic.

Rey Mysterio def. Pentagon Dark

Rare singles match for Rey, and what a match up this is! Really good bout, it maintained a great tempo, people were onto it, Penta was really dominating and having his way with the king. He got too cocky though and got in the face of Vamp who decided to leave and avoid conflict. That helped Rey hit a Mexican Destroyer and get a huge win. Would like them to have a bigger story and have more time, but even this bout was awesome. 87/100

Vamp left early to have a talk with Puma who wasn’t the same after his loss to Muertes. Vamp says if he wants to be the man again, he has to take him down. Puma doesn’t need his help, saying he is surprised that he doesn’t call for Pentagon to be taken out. Vamp insists that it’s about Puma and not him… but has that sinister look on his face for a second.

Show Rating: 80/100 (B) Strong show, but it didn’t feel like a start of the new season, more like the continuation of season two, but after intermission. That’s not bad at all though. Great main event and good opener.

SEASON 3, EPISODE 2 (THE AMULET)

After a traditional recap a sitcom-esque transition leads us to detectives and captain Hotness, as she is known on the MMM show.

She listens to how Cisco was murdered, but even though Cortez is ready to take Dario in, she tells the guys that this war is bigger than some street thug. Joey Ryan snickers, gets his arm twisted a bit, and Cortez corrects Cpt. Hotness, saying it’s Mr. Cisco. Is this a local meme?

Famous B interrupts Melissa once more, and hypes up his famous client Dr. Wagner. His opponent for tonight is B’s former client, the one and only Mascarita Sagrada.

Dr. Wagner Jr. def. Mascarita Sagrada

This “match” lasted less than a minute, and half of it Sagrada spent in the hammerlock. Doctor took one rolling bump and struck the mini with a Doctor Driver. Are we having four matches tonight, or one very long one? 20/100

Marty and Killshot are shown on a Weapons of Mass Destruction match graphic with a cheap CGI explosion. That’s so corny, but the match is going to kick ass.

We have a vignette from a millenia ago, folks! One little girl is led to her dying father, who gives her this motivational speech about the war they can’t lose. She must lead the war against the Gods! La nina is not impressed, and understands very little. Papa gives her a Piedra immortal, an amulet that grants the owner eternal youth and life. Its power works only on females (huh)…

The girl accepts it, and as of now the angle tells us that the girl is Captain Vasquez, but it could also be the owner of the other part, because its power explains one certain character on the show too. Vasquez looks at the amulet, but hides it when Cortez comes in. It took a week, but Cueto is going to jail. Cap says no, he does, cause the commission got their hands on the tape and will raid The Temple right after Ultima Lucha. Cortez thinks that’s great, but the woman lashes out, explaining that Dario is a small fish in this game, and was just a link to the real criminals. She suspends Castro and he leaves…

Mil Muertes def. Argenis

Quick squash for Mil. The highlight of the match was Striker’s imitation of the flatline sounds, it went on for quite a bit and was pretty awkward, which made it cringeworthy and hilarious at the same time. Argenis never wins shit, Mil now has red eyes. The winner was never in doubt. 38/100

After the beating and The Lick of Death, Puma jumps Mil in the ring. He dons a darker mask now, and it seems like Vampiro’s spiel worked on him. Prince looks to right the wrongs of Ultima Lucha Uno, and take it upwards from there. Catrina stands in between the two, the rivalry is reignited once more.

Cueto walks around his office and pets his porcelain red bull when he’s disturbed by Joey Ryan. he sucks on his lollipop and says he knows that Dario killed Cisco because he’s a cop. Cueto says he must have some big cojones just saying it to him like that. “Yes, that’s true!” Lol. Ryan offers to be a double agent, cause when the war comes, he wants to be on the right side. He rats out Cortez for being a po-po and puts his hand out, asking for money, he has child support to pay. Double lol. You know, I was never a Joey ryan fan, but this sleazebag can be funny. He’s so good in his character, probably because he’s sleazy in real life too.

Another Cortez film. He thought long and hard about which side he chooses to play for, and he at last decided to play for Vasquez.

Killshot def. Marty “The Moth” Martinez – Weapons of Mass Destruction Match

Where do I start? This was the star making performance for both men, and they got a lot of time to go through all the places the arena has to offer, and all the weapons that were deployed at ringside. Marty started bleeding early after he was boinked with a rifle handle. Killshot yeeted a couple of chairs at Marty’s face to open up the cut, but the mad lad was just laughing, coping with pain through his snickering. He grabbed Killshot by the grenades at one point. Killshot threw some extra loud superkicks, and they went into the tool boxes after a Superplex, Spinebuster, you name it.

Martinez even hit a German on the apron, and that wasn’t the high spot of the match. A lot of people got hit by ladders in this match, fans and camera crew, thankfully not Melissa. She played the role of the hostage at one point, but was just shaken, not harmed. Killshot hit both of his finishers on Moth, but he kicked out. The creepy bastard won’t die.that easy, so a giant ladder and two tables are introduced.

People wonder who will fall first, but here’s Mariposa, who tries to stop the soldier, but flies down, taking a nasty bump! Killshot then grabs Moth by grenades of his own, headbutts him, stomps him on top of the ladder, retrieves his dog tags back and drives Moth THROUGH THE TABLE WITH A DOUBLE FOOT STOMP FROM THE LADDER.

A holy shit moment for the ages, and a gigantic exclamation point to end this war. Although the tempo wasn’t the highest, the intensity and brutality of the spots was off the charts. Respect to both men for going through this… 90/100

The show ends with Mil punching the lockers and dropping them on the floor. Catrina tells him to calm down, Meurtes screams that he wants Puma. “Patience is a virtue, I waited for hundreds of years to get what I want!” Catrina unveils the other part of the amulet. Interesting, and as of this moment, there’s no connection to her and Captain Hotness.

Show Rating: 78/100 (B) The WMD match pulled this one towards a very good show. Two squashes did not establish anything new. There was a lot of air time for the Amulet storyline, now connection the Death campers with police and crooks. Things are hotting up!

SEASON 3, EPISODE 3 (ULTIMATE OPPORTUNITIES)

Rey and DAJ have a training backstage, with Mysterio telling his protege to let others beat up Pentagon, he has a lot of enemies, while they have a bigger fish to fry. It’s not easy for Dragon to just forget how Penta broke the his arm and almost crippled his mentor. Here’s time for Chavo, he slides in the ring to count a pin, immediately pounced on by Azteca for being a liar. Chavito busts out Lance Strom’s finish and Rey tells him to let go. Guerrero tells that he should have clued in the youngling about him. The match is brewing, it seems.

Matanza def. The Mack – Lucha Underground Title Match

Another victim of Dario’s Dial of Doom is The Mack. Matanza waits for him on the staircase, but the fan favorite enters through the backdoor. Stunner on the outside, Mack is grabbing this opportunity with two hands. Dominates for a bit, even POUNCES the monster, but eventually lands his Frog Splash on the knees of Cueto and falls to The Wrath of the Gods. 72/100

We’re lucky that the Sacrifice to the Gods is not introduced yet.

Son of Havoc and Mascarita Sagrada are watching the telly in the basement, when they run into a Famous B commercial. They both hate the man, but their mood changes for the better after Mrs. havoc tells them to go eat some Bagel Bites. Awesome segment.

Johnny barges into Dario’s office while he sniffs cocaine, and demands the world title shot. Cueto tells him to relax, he’s in the Trios title match tonight. Mundo is only interested in the main title, so he boycotts the match. Taya who visited with Johnny asked if El Jefe needs a replacement, and he smiles approvingly. Taya points out that the boss has a little something on his nose, and now he’s pissed and tells her to get out.

Cage and Texano are in the ring, Jefe now explains the logic behind this match. He wanted to see them in the finals of his mini-tournament at Ultima Lucha, but they both lost. Now the winner tonight will get an ULTIMATE opportunity. Win and find out what it is…

Cage def. Texano

Nice little preview of things to come. Texano and Cage are both capable brawlers and can take it to the air when needs be. Here Cage catches Texano with a Discuss Clothesline to score the win. Pretty fun match, but not long enough to stay in the memory. 71/100

Dario reveals that they’re in a Best of 5 Series now, and the winner will get a super duper unique opportunity.

Cueto now in his office, sorting out his mail. He got a 423 Get Fame cap, how cool. He also got some creepy photos, and if I can see right, it’s Rosa’s images. DAJ walks in and demands a match with Penta, but the boss is not very attentive. He “pencils in” the match though, then Ricky comes in to ask where will his next match be? Before Jefe can even answer, Mandel looks at the pics that Dario put to trash a moment ago, they’re back on the table. Creeped out by them, Cueto gifts them to the job guy. Fianlly Chavito steps in and says that they need to talk…

Drago, Aerostar, Fenix def. Taya, Jack Evans, PJ Black – Lucha Underground Trios title match

The big story here is that Jack has a broken jaw or something, and he can’t yell as he usually does. He acts like a petulant child, and Taya plays the role of the mom, quoting Matt Striker. The action is fast paced as you would expect, and Fenix once again stiffs Taya with some kicks. Lucha bros do not have any barriers it seems. Aerostar pins PJ after a Springboard Codebreaker, technicos retain the belts. 73/100

Mundo attacks the winners and losers join in, until Sexy runs out to save the day. Suspend your disbelief here for a bit, this is going to be a cool 4 on 4 match!

Rey and Dario are talking, Mysterio finds out by another hot-headed move by his protege, and Dario tells him that he will not get Penta. He will get Chavito for the right to battle Penta in a grudge match, since both got their arms broken by this psychopath.

Rey thanks El Jefe, but he does him one better. Rey will be the special guest referee for that match, and he will put it in ink!

Show Rating: 75/100 (B-) Three evenly good matches, but none of them were exceptional. Good, if not very good effort. The only negative is Chavo getting the minutes once again, and potentially taking away Rey from some dream opponents. It can be good, but c’mon, we saw that 10 years ago (at the time of the tapings) in WWE.

SEASON 3 EPISODE 4 (BROTHERS IN BROKEN ARMS)

Dario approaches Sexy Star, talks about Mack getting beat and asks if she’s afraid of Matanza. She’s not. Cueto points out that she will either lose the Gift of the Gods or get squashed. But tonight she’s tagging with Super Friends against Worldwide Underground in an Atomicos match. Sexy just pouts, Dario has to go. Mundo comes around and introduces himself as the next GotG champ. Tense stare down.

Chimpz are monkeying around with the guitars. They are not only our good friends, they are our prime mates. Badum tss, Striker.

Prince Puma def. Siniestro de la Muerte

Announcers talk about the newer Puma style, he added a bit of edge to his game but still is a ridiculous high flyer. It is not a total squash, but Puma is in total control. Mil tried to interfere, but missed with a Spear. Puma sends a message to Muertres taking out SdlM with a Flatliner. 64/100

Two originals tussle it out for a bit, Catrina once again restrains Mil.

Cortez visits Dario in the office, El Jefe gives the dude a big hug. He’s very sorry for what happened to Cisco, and will get the killer soon. Meanwhile… he has a match. Life goes on.

Pentagon Dark def. Cortez Castro

Straight up squash match. Package Piledriver gets the win, and Penta breaks the arm of the cop too. 45/100

Penta grabs a mic and says no matter who wins – old man Chavo or skinny punk Dragon Azteca Jr, he will kick both of their asses. Nice little promo, a rare beep in The Temple.

Worldwide Underground def. Fenix, Drago, Aerostar, Sexy Star – Atomicos match

Well this was crazy and a notch faster than usual multi-man tag matches. No filler all killer, people were flying in and out. Jack flipped around without inflicting much damage but a Fingerpoke to the Chocolate Eye… eventually he catches Sexy with a modified Crucifix to get the win. Taya seemed to get injured here. Jack wrestles with his jaw shut close. 83/100

Siniestro is on his knees before Mil, and Catrina snaps his neck. She sucks the life out of him, passes it down to Mil who gets lightning on his mask and red eyes. Holy shitballs, that’s too much ballyhoo. But they are awesome, so well done.

El Dragon Azteca Jr def. Chavo Guerrero – Rey Mysterio Jr as Special Guest Referee

This wasn’t worth the main event slot. The chain wrestling was ok, but they didn’t go at it. Instead Chavo provoked Rey into attacking him and setting up a Victory Roll for his protege. So it’s not even a clean victory for Dragon. I may sound harsh, but Chavo feuding with Rey is a total waste of time. After the bout Mysterio adds a 619 and celebrates with Azteca. 56/100

The last thing we see is Black Lotus lighting some candles. She says that she killed a man that killed someone… he no longer walks the Earth. Did I miss something? When did she kill anyone? Anyway, she’s not done in The Temple. She will return with a Black Lotus Tribe to teach Pentagon some fear! Awesome.

Show Rating: 67/100 (C+) Decent, but not spectacular. The Atomicos Match was great.

SEASON 3, EPISODE 5 (THE PRINCE AND THE MONSTER)

Dario spins his Dial of Doom and it is Puma who gets a match with Matanza! Huge main event, first champ versus the most dominant one.

Ivelisse def. Mariposa w/Marty

Pretty ok match, Moth helped his sister to heel it up. Ivelisse is super over, and she hits a Yoshi Tonic to score the pinfall. Not a lot of story here, besides the fact that Moth is still a creep. 53/100

Siblings get their heat back by attacking the winner. No help comes her way…

Mundo asks why in the heck loser Puma gets a title shot and he does not. Johnny does not believe in fate, saying his abs were not a divine intervention, it was all hard work. He wants the main title, and is ready to get it via Sexy. He figures out that she lost, and Cueto agrees, putting Evans in a title match instead of him. Great idea, Johnny!

5 second promo of the White Rabbit. They are coming! Weeeeee!

Cage def. Texano Best of 5 Series Match #2

Good energetic match, Mr. GMSI makes it 2-0. The strength and athleticism were on display here, and they still have more to show. People liked it, I did too. F5 gets The Machine a victory. 80/100

Hmm, look who is here… Jeremiah Crane aka Sami Callihan is backstage, asking how his boo boo Ivelisse is doing after the match. Upon finding out that she was jumped, Crane’s fists get itchy, but Ivy tells him to bring her home and get her a drink. Son of Havoc relationship is really over… sad.

Matanza def. Prince Puma – Lucha Underground Title match

Puma bumped like a madman in this match, and deadlifted the monster twice!! Incredible performance by Prince who was two seconds away from winning the title. That is until Mim showed up to spear the everliving bejesus out of the hero. Dario says that is not a DQ. Muertes adds a Flatliner, leaving Matanza to easily beat Puma with a Wrath of the Gods. Great match hindered by a finish. 85/100

Post match Joey Ryan approaches Killshot to pass him over a letter. Killshot asks Ryan about who it was, Sleazy One says he’s not a detective. The note reads “You left me for dead”… this is a start of something beautiful.

Show Rating: 84/100 (B+) Really good main event and semi main with Cage and Texano. Great effort!

SEASON 3, EPISODE 6 (THE OPEN ROAD TO REVENGE)

Dragon Azteca Jr. wears the mask, preparing for his match with Pentagon. In his locker room that has El Dragon Azteca vs Chavo Guerrero Classic. Chavo shows up in a red poncho and bashes Dragon with a steel chair multiple times. He wants revenge on Penta before the young punk and says that his dad kicked Azteca’s ass that night, referring to the poster. He walks off and bumps into Rey, who can’t see the damage done to his protege yet. Mysterio discovers his boy and asks if it was Penta. Azteca motions that it wasn’t him, and we get a funny as fuck “CHAAAAVOOOOO!” scream from Rey. Fun segment!

Grudge tag team match opens the show… Dr. Wagner Jr and Famous B will face Son of Havoc and Mascarita Sagrada they roll in on the bike, and they look dope as fuck! Famous B is bewildered, let’s go!

Famous B and Dr. Wagner Jr. def. Son of Havoc and Mascarita Sagrada

This was a weird bout. You couldn’t call it a comedy match, but you also couldn’t really buy into it as a serious contest. Wagner bumping for Mascarita is something… tecnicos do ok, but then The Bad Doctor pushes Havoc down from the turnbuckle, hits a Wagner Driver on the mini and tags in Famous B to get the fall. Love the face duo, but this was so-so. 42/100

Quick vignette for the Rabbit Tribe, announcers get info that Azteca was ambushed. They also hype up Puma/Muertes for next week.

Sexy Star def. Jack Evans

Sexy came out with a fancy cane, Jack can scream again now, yay! He cuts this hateful promo and calls himself the Star Destroyer, gets slapped. Jack bumps for Sexy, and makes her look good. He has this moment where he has her in the Camel Clutch and ad libs praise to himself with her mouth. Eventually PJ Black runs in with a kendo stick and plays air guitar with it, and Mundo spears Sexy and rolls under the ring. Jack covers her, but the champ still kicks out! Drago and Aerostar make it an equal game with their attack on Worldwide Underground and Fenix distracts Evans and the ref for a kendo stick to Jack’s nuts and a swinging fisherman neckbreaker for three. 49/100

So Chavo almost gets a main event against Penta now, after finding out from Dario that Azteca is not leaving the hospital anytime soon. Rey walks in and demands a match with that POS! Woah, 25 years of friendship and Rey has the balls to accuse him like that. Rey says in 25 year he got familiar with his handwork! Dario witnesses a little scuffle and he loves it. He decides to put them both in the main event, making it a three way dance with Pentagon Dark! Awesome booking really, Chavo and Penta want revenge on Rey, and it gives us a nice dynamic.

Pentagon Dark def. Rey Mysterio Jr and Chavo Guerrero Jr

This is a damn good match. Chavo of course slowed it down quite a lot, but Rey looked good and had extra time to rest here, not that he needed that too much. Vamp compares Chavo to a hyena, that’s on point. Fans support both Rey and Penta, and they are involved in the ending. The finish is amazing and super creative – Chavo stifles Rey’s aerial attack and gets kicked away by Penta who then puts the legend out with a Package Piledriver!! Big victory for Pentagon Dark. 81/100

Penta once again tries to break Rey’s arm, but the legend comes strong and fends off the bastard. Chavo uses this to ambush Rey’s knee with a chair. Reminiscent of the finish to their I Quit match in WWE, but also Marty Elias gets a headshot.

Final Rating: 67/100 (C+) The main event saved this episode, really. Huge win for Pentagon, but also Chavo standing tall is wasted air time. Oh well…

SEASON 3, EPISODE 7 (PAYBACK TIME)

Puma is fixing his gear when sneaky Vamp wishes him luck. Prince scowls back and says he would rather die by Mil’s hands than love by his. Vamp takes a step back, but still says he bets on Puma to kill Mil. Extra sinister Vamp, the circles under his eyes give away he’s not Ian.

Once again it’s time for Dario’s Dial of Doom. “The winner” is Killshot, who’s a bit softened up after his war with Marty.

Matanza def. Killshot

Matanza Cueto is a short but stacked technical wrestler, while Killshot is a lean and nimble high flyer. They can both brawl too, so it is a good combination. Matanza dominates, but Killshot gets his hope spot. Misses with a Double Foot Stomp, and gets pinned in the middle of the ring after a Wrath of Gods. Good opener. 71/100

After the match people chant for Killshot, and that’s when Dante Fox appears for the first time. Killshot can’t believe he is alive, so he touches the man as if he was a ghost. After an embrace, Fox stomps the man who left him for dead and lays him out with a sweet looking DDT. Nice angle to introduce a top talent in AR Fox.

Trios champs Drago, Aerostar and Fenix are here, but Dario comes out before their opponents. El Jefe announces that in 4 weeks we will have Aztec Warfare! And since his brother wrecked everyone, he puts him as number one. Ballsy! Furthermore, Fenix will have a chance to enter as number 20. Because there’s gonna be a 3-way between trios champs for that unique opportunity right now! The twist is… losers are out of Warfare altogether!

Drago def. Fenix and Aerostar

A surprising result of a very fun back and forth match! Fenix looked great and hit some stiff flying kicks, also bled from his nose for a long time. A bunch of innovative spots, they show us what lucha libre is all about. People never switch off, and the finish is a bit surprising. Fenix and Aerostar will miss the big match, shame. Very good match! 83/100

Mundo once again in Dario’s office. He’s getting desperate to get the title shot when all of his friends got one before him. Mundo puts a briefcase with the $100,000 he won in season one (actually around 940 thousands) to buy the match. Damn, that’s a lot for a match with Sexy Star… Dario takes it and says Johnny is on the card.

Drago and toilet skits are a thing of tradition now. Kobra Moon slithers behind and by the looks of things she wants him back into the Snake Tribe. Drago says he will never return to it and roars!

Main event time!

Prince Puma def. Mil Muertes

Another great main event to cap off this outstanding episode. This one is not super long, so they get down straight to business. Mil throws his fists, Puma flies all over the place. It’s a great combo of styles and a solid story of redemption. Catrina does not step in here, letting it go clean, although Mil used a chair twice. It’s pretty even, but tonight Puma is the better man. 630 for the win! 87/100

The final segment involves Rey Mysterio and Chavo Classic. Rey wants to make sure that his future match with Chavito won’t affect the relationship between their families. Classic asks if he really wants that, and Mysterio nods. Either he leaves, or I do…

Show Rating: 84/100 (B+) Top to bottom amazing show. Three main event caliber matches and nice stories.

SEASON 3, EPISODE 8 (GIFTS OF THE GODS)

Sexy Star walks in on drinking Dario and informs him that she cashes in her Gift of the Gods title against Matanza next week! He wonders if she knows about her match with Mundo, but she just says that he will be a warm up for her, the first woman to win the LU title. She’s super confident, huh?

Marty The Moth def. Ivelisse

A continuation of this little feud gives Marty a win after his battle with Killshot. Creepy Bastard and The Baddest Bitch In The Building have a decent match, Mariposa once even bit Ivy in the face. 62/100

Post match Jeremiah Crane aka Sami Callihan runs out to brawl with Moth and his stepsister. Ivelisse did not want any help, but after looking annoyed joined her BF and sent the heels packing. No comments about their relationship yet, but Jeremiah hugged the loser after the bout.

Ivellise then tells her man that she doesn’t want him here, but he stopped listening to people once he dropped out of high school. Oooh what a rebel. He’s not like her ex. “A couple that slays together stays together” spiel seems to work, but if Cueto puts them against each other – she will kick his ass. Playful dirty talk huh? On the other side of the same area Dario visits the Lord’s limo. His assistant chills there with the box, and asks Cueto if he found a new host for the God. Cueto says he did, in fact, both of them are perfect for the role – big and strong (talking about Cage and Texano). Dario leaves with the box, dramatic music ensues.

Paul London followed the White Rabbit and found his roots, so he’s now a part of the Rabbit Tribe. Those short vignettes have been going for 5 episodes already, so the debut must be on the horizon.

Texano def. Cage – Best Of Five Series Match #3

Match 3 of this best of 5 series, and Texano is trailing 2-0. He needs to win or he goes home. Good fight, fun brawl, but Cage gets too careless and cocky with his pins. Cage throws everything at Texano, but he’s kicking out. Steiner Screwdriver intended to put the mexican away, but he got a roll up and the win to make it 2-1… 76/100

Hey, someone in The Temple has manners! Rey gently knocks on Dario’s door and only comes in after getting permission. He wants a Loser Leaves Lucha match against Chavo… sometimes it is necessary to put the dog down. Dario agrees and says the main event is set for next week!

Johnny Mundo def. Sexy Star – Gift Of The Gods Title Match

This match gets a lot of time, and Mundo does a commendable job here. He makes Sexy look good and plays his role to perfection. By the way, Drago, Fenix and Aerostar are banned from showing up, the same can not be said about Worldwide Underground. Ref bump, and here they are, laying out the champ. Mundo is two seconds away from Pillmanazing Sexy’s neck when The Mack shows up to save the day with Stunners. Big kaboosh chairshot for the near fall… the fight resumes with Sexy being distracted, ref wrestles the chair away from Johnny, but he uses the brass knucks instead and wins! 2/3 titles in The Temple for him, well deserved! Match was ok, but it’s not a classic. 74/100

After that underhanded victory Vamp once again harasses Puma and now brings up Konnan. He reminds Prince that they killed him, and 1-1 ain’t gonna cut it. Are they teasing a Grave Consequences match? Puma says he remembers all the shit Vamp talked about Konnan, but Vamp says he HATES Konnan, but he always respected Puma. The end!

Show Rating: 77/100 (B-) Solid show, but not to the same level as the episode before that.

SEASON 3, EPISODE 9 (LOSER LEAVES LUCHA)

What better way to start the show then with Dario’s Dial of Doom? This time it’s Dario’s choice… Rey is busy, do people want Penta? Oh wait, Matanza already beat him. What a way to rub the salt to the wounds. Ha, that reminds El Jefe. Pentagon broke the arm of one sorry ass guy, but he still comes here every week to rehab, hoping to once get his big shot. Your big chance is tonight, Cortez Castro!

Matanza def. Cortez Castro

Matanaza beats Cortez up and removes the cast he had on his arm. Stomps on it for quite some time and eventually finishes cop off with The Wrath of Gods. 48/100

Dario mocks Castro and tells him to get as much rest as he needs undercover, then calls him a rat. Then we cut to Dario laughing his ass off to Joey Ryan’s jokes. Suddenly Son of Havoc comes in with Mascarita to ask Jefe for a shot. Mini wants a fight with Famous B… Dario jokes around, says if he beats Wagner, Sagrada will get a match. If not – Famous B will pick a stipulation for Mascarita. Faces take up that offer, Dario continues to shoot jokes.

Puma cuts a promo and his voice cracks on the first sentence, oh boy. He challenges Mil to a rubber match – Grave Consequences! Catrina immediately accepts and Muertes sneak attacks Prince. He’s wearing a sharp suit, as if he just visited someone’s funeral. This exchange goes to Puma once again, and the main event for next week will be great.

Son of Havoc def. Dr. Wagner Jr.

Son of Havoc starts hot and I am honestly surprised that he looked so strong against the lucha libre legend. Famous B and Mascarita tassle outside of the ring, and Brenda cheers the doc with her high pitched voice. Shooting Star Press brings the W to the biker, big result! 68/100

Post match Wagner is aided to the back, while SoH tells Famous B they are choosing a Believer’s Backlash match, and all fans can bring the weapons! Good stuff.

Announcers confirm Grave Consequences match for next week!

Rey Mysterio def. Chavo Guerrero

You know, this match has changed my perception of this feud. This was a really good traditional match with plenty of psychology. Of course they also have the chemistry and experience to make a good match. Chavo Classic got bumping early, and then blasted his own son to get him a DQ victory. Guerreros started celebrating but Dario called BS and restarted the match! 619 to Chavo Classic, Chavito still fighting and almost makes Rey tap… but The King overcomes the odds and gets the win to send Chavo packing. It is his best match here, so good send off. 85/100

Final Rating: 73/100 (B-) Big victory for Rey, but sadly, it’s not the last time we will see Chavo in Lucha Underground.

SEASON 3, EPISODE 10 (READY FOR WAR)

Catrina pumps Mil up for his big match against Puma. She wants Prince dead, and if Muertes loses again, she will not bring him back. But before we get all serious, let’s have some fun.

Mascarita Sagrada def. Famous B – Believer’s Backlash

This was great, both guys entertained the heck out of the fans who brought a lot of toys into play. A bowling ball spot was amazing, Striker screaming creampie to Brenda when she gets hit with eh… well cream pie… toilet paper, popcorn, wizard hats, mini ladder – it had it all. Wagner was taken backstage by Son of Havoc and the little white tiger hit a twisting DDT for the win. Awesome! 79/100

After the match Mascarita cuts the head of cardboard Famous B and gets the jacket of SoH’s biker club.

Killshot approaches Dante backstage, offering him peace. Fox accepts, and they call each other brothers, but in a bit passive aggressive way. They have that hug where both have hostile faces, but nobody can see it.

Toilet nunchaku practice from Drago, he’s once again disturbed by Kobra Moon. Drago says he never was a part of the Snake Tribe, he just was their slave. Kobra hints that Pindar captured Daga, to which Drago acts surprised, as he didn’t think Pindar was alive. Vinny Massaro once again walks into Kobra in the men’s toilet, and decides to go to ladies, after giving out his signature fart.

Mack, Marty, Mariposa, Ivelisse, Crane def. Cage, Argenis, Texano, Killshot, Dante

Debuts for Dante and Jeremiah! They start well, and then everyone else joins in the party to get their shit in. The match is of course fast paced, Dante and Killshot work well together, but then Fox turns on the brother in arms again to give the victory to Marty. Ivelisse re injured herself here, shame. The winners of this match may now enter Aztec Warfare. 58/100

Dario asks if Matanza is ready for Aztec Warfare and if he remembers what their father prepared him for? Matanza claps and says WAR. Short and sweet.

Mil Muertes def. Prince Puma – Grave Consequences

Well you wouldn’t expect anything but absolute greatness from these two, and they worked very hard to deliver the goods. The spots on the very real coffin were insane, the 450 splash, the chokeslam, plus all those table spots. This was a wild brawl, even though it all started with a huge jump over the rails by Puma. Lots of commotion with furniture, but the match was cut well not to suffer from it. In the end Mil Flatliners Puma on the outside and puts him in the same casket where Konnan was trapped in season 1. A bit of an anticlimactic finish, but still a very good bout! 88/100

Show Rating: 82/100 (B) Really good opener and main event, second match wasn’t bad either. Good to see Mil getting a win in his signature match. Vamp was ominously smirking when Puma was carried out.

SEASON 3, EPISODE 11 (AZTEC WARFARE III)

Dario bumps into Mundo backstage, who’s super cocky. He says he will be the first man to hold the Gift of the Gods and Lucha Underground titles at the same time. Taya, who films her BF, says Johnny is doing a great job for the documentary. Mundo is confident that he will win, but puts a 1 week notice just in case he fights for the title next week. He enters at number 12, so Dario takes his paper, turns it into “2” and tells Mundo to put up or shut up. Johnny tells Taya to turn the camera off. Amazing segment!

Sexy Star wins Aztec Warfare III

Well, this was a well-built match, with loads of intervening stories. Son of Havoc/Crane, Penta/Matanza, Worldwide Underground/everyone… Among notable things – Penta was eliminated early by Black Lotus Triad, Rey defeated Matanza (!!) so the monster crushed Rey’s back, Angelico returned with another big crossbody to take out Mundo, Mack was in the final 3, and finally Sexy Star beat Mil Muertes to win the LU crown. Huge win for her, and even though her victory was not a popular choice, it was an important moment that falls in line with all the stories. Great Aztec Warfare, as always. 87/100

Show Rating: 85/100 (B+) Really strong one match show. Among all the Warfare’s this was a bit on the weaker side, but still awesome. Drago entered as number 20 and was eliminated almost seconds later… that’s not cool. Same with Penta, Lotus Triad could have snuck in later. Apart from that, it has been great.

SEASON 3, EPISODE 12 (EVERY WOMAN IS SEXY, EVERY WOMAN IS A STAR)

After a recap of Aztec Warfare III we get a short video of The Rabbit Tribe. Paul London followed the call of white rabbit to meet his destiny, and looks like he made some friends while doing so. The chequered guy and regenerated Cisco are dancing with London… they are here!

Fenix, Drago, Aerostar def. The Rabbit Tribe

Rabbit Tribe is basically a bunch of dudes having a feel good trip, there were some dope references and the wording of expanding your vision, which is open for interpretation. There were a few comedy spots, but the match was still athletic. Not a bad debut, but The Superfriends are a cut above the Rabbits. During the match Kobra Moon looked over Drago who eliminated her from Aztec Warfare. 62/100

Mack congratulates Sexy on winning the title, after playfully wondering how she won that thing before him. He says he will look over her tonight, but Star is adamant, claiming she has to do it alone. Oh yis, Mack’s babyface charm rubs off on anyone.

Dante Fox def. Killshot

Wow what a match!! Many remember their iconic match later on, but this bout is also amazing. They have insane chemistry and understanding, and they are not afraid to take some damage. FU on the apron was brutal, and Dante somehow survived to dispatch Killshot with a Foxcatcher. Totally awesome match! 88/100

Mundo cries to Dario about Angelico, but Cueto himself didn’t know about him. It seems like Johnny hired a lawyer/agent to put a restraining order on the man… tonight though he has a date with destiny. Passive aggressive exchange between Jefe and Mundo turns comical. “What a prick!” – Cueto says under his breath when the champ is out.

Black Lotus occupies Jefe’s seat and demands a match for Black Lotus Triad against Pentagon Dark. Dario agrees, putting them in a gauntlet match. He doesn’t necessarily think that he will beat them easily, as win or lose, the gauntlet will go on. Lotus is satisfied, but she is not very animated about it.

Johnny Mundo def. Sexy Star

And so Mundo cashes in his title, taking Sexy to Slamtown. He’s making her look good while dominating, and making it believable when she fights off. One of the better singles matches for Sexy, and probably the biggest match in her career. Finish comes after Mundo wrestles a crutch out of some “fan”, pulling a masked woman outside. She sneak attacks Sexy with brass knucks and Johnny is there to pick up the scraps. Anticlimactic finish, but perhaps the right winner. 75/100

Show Rating: 76/100 (B-) Dante and Killshot stole the show. It had a lot of fresh faces too, and did not lose in quality much. Happy to see Mundo as Grand Slam champ.

SEASON 3, EPISODE 13 (BREAKER OF BONES)

Vamp bumps into Penta and tells him not to forget anything that happened between them. Penta just shoves a Cero Miedo in his face and goes on to have a match. Vamp is silent near the table, ignoring a lot of questions from Striker.

Pentagon def. Doku

Sheesh, Doku went flying a couple of times and sold leg kicks like death. She showed some heart and the wrestler better known as Kairi Sane or Kairi Hojo is an ultra babyface, I don’t know how you can hate her. Even then, believers enjoyed the beating dished out by Penta. Insane Elbow was so good fans asked for another one, and this was enough for Penta to catch the joshi and break her arm. Great start! 79/100

Jeremiah pumps iron backstage and he is approached by Catrina who mocks Ivelisse for getting an injury. They have an announced match for Ultima Lucha, Crane points out. Catrina then switches a topic saying that he doesn’t love Ivelisse, he loves her… but she loves another man. They have some history, as Crane has a part of her stone on his neck. I missed this storyline completely, wow.

Pentagon Dark def. Yurei

Match number two, and this time Penta is being dominated for a long stretch. Yurei is taller than Doku, and uses her size well, throwing Penta around some. She gets caught into a Package Piledriver though and also gets her arm broken, which causes an immediate stoppage. Another good fight. 77/100

Matanza is punching the wall in anger in his cage. Dario likes what he sees, says he will take back the title soon from that prick Mundo. NO! Matanza wants Mysterio!! Dario notices a huge question mark shaped blood stain on the wall and walks off. Amazing skit.

Hitokiri def. Pentagon Dark

Well this was bonkers. The force with which Hitokiri was thrown into the chairs twice was remarkable. Chops and kicks, and some super sweet aerial moves put Penta on the backfoot. He gets his heat back a bit after being stiffed with a chair, choking the opponent with a TV cable. Vamp just orgasms at the signs of violence around, or maybe he has a chubby because Penta is getting his ass whooped. Huge dive from the balcony, somewhere Angelico got a hiccup. Hitokiri blocks the Piledriver and executes her own flipping finisher, to get a huge win! Best match of three. 90/100

We are scheduled to have one more bout, but Penta can’t get up, so Marty Elias is kicked out by Black Lotus. The leader then breaks the arm of The Ninja Skeleton! Dragon Azteca Jr returns, has a stare down with Lotus, and she leaves. Azteca does not though, and gets his revenge by breaking the other arm of Penta. He must be out for a while now… Vamp is loving it so much judging by his face expressions.

And we are not done, as Vampiro now has a creepy face paint on his face as he stands over awakened Prince Puma. “Come with me” he says, as the first LU champion opens his eyes and gasps for air. Absolutely awesome!

Show Rating: 91/100 (A) This is a very memorable show that had its own episodic storyline while driving other angles. Liked all three matches, as you can’t get too much of Penta, and joshi wrestlers are amazing. Love this episode!

SEASON 3, EPISODE 14 (THE BULLS OF BOYLE HEIGHTS)

Recap of how Mundo won the Gift of the Gods, how he was eliminated from Aztec Warfare after Angelico returned, and how Taya bamboozled Sexy to let Johnny pick up the main title. There also is Best of 5 Series, where Texano cut Cage’s lead to 2-1.

Angelico enters Cueto’s office to demand a match with Mundo, with or without title, but tonight. Dario’s hands are tied, as Johnny’s lawyer is a real shark! Angelico says he should probably lawyer up too, as he was violently assaulted twice here and Dario didn’t do shit. Hey, violence is the norm here, but Angelico pins down Jefe and he is forced to put him in the Battle of The Bulls tournament. Angelico agrees and says Mundo soon will need an undertaker, not a lawyer. Dario calls him stupid when the door is closed.

Cage def. Joey Ryan, Dr. Wagner Jr, Texano

This was a pretty good match, all four guys got their time to shine. Not a lot of mentions for Best of 5, but that’s ok. Match started with Cage lariating the hell out of Famous B, sick! Lots of action, some high flying, and of course hard knocks. Cage looked the most impressive, followed by Texano. All four worked hard, but it’s The Machine who picks up the fall by pinning Joey. 68/100

Dario sympathizes with Sexy after she has lost her title to Worldwide Underground, saying she will get into it with PJ tonight. If she wins – she will get her title rematch in the cage, but if not… she will never challenge for the title again. Sexy is calm, says ok. Dario wants to talk more, Sexy just tells him that he may have escaped the troublesome past, but if he crosses her – he will have a troublesome future too. Damn girl.

Cortez Castro visits Detective Vasquez to tell her that his cover has been blown. He can’t come back… the woman pulls out a mask, and says he will have to go deeper this time, as a brand new man. She doesn’t trust Joey Ryan anymore too (they are using his real last name here, funny).

Sexy Star def. PJ Black

Another solid match, with a couple of good moments. The best one is certainly a near fall after Black busted out a Styles Clash! They worked ok here, but I couldn’t not think about how PJ called Sexy the worst worker ever on Twitter that one time. They put on a good enough match that was taken by Sexy after Jack Evans slightly botched his interference and was superkicked for his troubles. 65/100

We get an awesome skit where Queen Kobra Moon talks about the history of her Tribe, one of the greatest ones! A millennia ago they were deserted by Drago, and now it’s time to bring him back and make him kneel before his queen. Pindar and Vibora, her generals, look ready to strike. Much royal, such gold, wow!

Dario visits caged Matanza, asking if he’s sure he will not take part in the battle of the bulls? Monster growls for Rey, so Jefe rolls his eyes, saying he will get him when he will be back after the injuries he gave him. Dario points out that Rey’s protege is in the match, and is about to take his place… Matanza caresses Dario’s hair but then bashes his head across the cage to knock the bro out and get his hands on the key!

Before the main event I just wanted to note a story told about Azteca’s Eagle Tribe. Warriors would take an umbilical cord of a newborn child and bury it into the ground in hopes to appease the Gods and continue the line of great warriors. That’s wazzup!

The Mack def. Mil Muertes, Marty The Moth and Dragon Azteca Jr

Surprisingly not a long match at all, and they barely got going, or maybe I expected too much out of it. The Mack/Marty backburner feud continues here. Azteca the flashiest out of the bunch, Mil also on top of his game. Eventually though Dragon is put down by Matanza… he is powerbombed by Mil, who was out of it after this move. Dario called Matanza back with his key, while holding a bloody towel tight to his face. Mack catches Moth with a cross-country Stunner to get another match with Cage, effectively for the #1 contendership. 53/100

Show Rating: 60/100 (C) Ok show, nothing overly spectacular. Opener was the best match here, no doubt. Nice Snake Tribe vignette, really awesome angles with Dario too.

SEASON 3, EPISODE 15 (EN LAS SOMBRAS)

Jeremiah Crane def. Mariposa, Dante Fox, Killshot

What a crazy-crazy match this was! It started off as you would expect, lots of Bicycle Kicks from Crane and some high flying from military dudes, but then the chairs got introduced and things went bonkers. First of all, Crane set up a tower of chairs, where on of eight or so chairs simply fell off and stayed legs up… the reaction of Dante upon seeing this was priceless, basically “yikes, but fuck it”… Mariposa tilted the power of doom and went on to wreck all for with chairs to the face! She even went on to hit a Kudo Driver on the chair to knock out Killshot!! Revenge for her fall in a WMD match? Dante saved his ex-bro, but in the end fell down to a Cranium Contusion. Absolutely amazing! 89/100

Killshot takes out his frustration on Dante with a Double Foot Stomp. No more attempts to patch it up from this man. Poor Fox, right?

Taya is filming Jack and PJ backstage, and it takes hundreds of cuts to get them not to goof around. Mundo comes in and asks what the hell are they doing it for when they all lost to Sexy? Taya compliments her BF and tells him to work for the camera. Dude turns his torso and pumps his bros in a deep voice, telling them to drop their sweet bandanas if they will lose tonight. And cut…

Sexy trains for her boxing career to a dramatic music, ex-champ is still working hard. She leaves the training ring and goes to her locker, opens it, AAARGH!! Don’t you just hate it when a bigass Tarantula chills on your stuff?

Drago def. Kobra Moon via DQ

Not a bad technical exchange here, with Drago having it all under control until Pindar appeared and shoved Drago down. 35/100

Aerostar and Fenix run out to fight off the bulky reptile, but Kobra calls for Vibora, who’s huge! He destroys both dudes, using Tombstone for one of them and kidnaps Drago on Kobra’s orders. Trios champs can’t save their hombre, Kobra and her goons vanish.

Sexy bumps into Mariposa in the corridor, and after the butterfly girl yanks the hair of Star, the fight breaks out. Sexy grabs Mariposa by the throat and tells her to think again if she wants to start another war with her. Mariposa doesn’t understand, and upon finding out about the spider laughs and says she would not put such an ugly thing there… Sexy punches a hole in the cheap cartoon wall, cool angle though.

PJ Black def. Son of Havoc, Angelico and Jack Evans

It felt a bit like a tornado tag, but that’s not a bad thing – it’s a food thing! Great main event with tons of athletic moves and drama. Angelico was the favorite for me, and he looked good on his return, but still fell a bit short here. Funny enough, this bout had a screwy finish. PJ told Jack to pin him a la Fingerpoke of Doom, but them cradled him for three. Didn’t see this coming, and I watch this a couple of years ago. Good match, but not like the opener. 78/100

At the end of the show Dragon Azteca visits Rey who still has a bum back… he says he was attacked by Matanza, and now he understands his purpose. Rey says he’s sorry, but Dragon says no, it was a good thing, and now he doesn’t get to tell him what to do. Dragon will build his own legacy by slaying Matanza…

Show Rating: 79/100 (B) Good show, nice debuts and an outstanding opener. Vignettes and matches are top notch too… LU is amazing.

SEASON 3, EPISODE 16 (BATTLE OF THE BULLS)

Tonight we have the finals of the BOTB tournament and a title cage match between Sexy and Johnny. Gotta be good!

Mack def. Cage, Crane, PJ Black

Cage starts well, and gets his shit in early so Texano can run in and knock him with a fist full of bull rope. PJ picks up the fall, Crane gets going, he really comes into his own in these last episodes. Mack is the fan favorite, and he takes Jeremiah out with a Stunner from the second rope! It’s only PJ now, and the final portion of the match is surprisingly short, as Mack gets a win after a simple Stunner. Might of been better to save Crane for last, but even then, this match was good. Kinda symbolic that Stunners give Mack a W in an episode 3:16! 76/100

Fenix and Aerostar look for Drago in the toilet, legit popping all the cabins open, ahahaha. This is hilarious. Kobra asks if they look for Drago, because he came back to her Tribe. Aerostar says Drago would not be a part of the reptiles due to a pact he laid down a millenia ago. Vibora and Pindar come knocking and we have a cinematic toilet brawl where sneaky bastards get the win. Kobra says that next time it will be Drago that will leave them for dead.

Crane is with Dario. Jefe asks if he’s sure, yeah he is. Jeremiah finds something he left in his office as a kid, so he picks up some… table game? Dario is bewildered, and I am too. How the hell that thing survived Mil and Matanza going through the roof in season 2? Crane bumps into Catrina who teases him for being a nerd and losing an opportunity, to which Crane says he will bring hell to Mil and get Catrina all to himself.

Also Sexy congrats Mack for his win, and they joke about their future match against each other. Main event is up next… and another tarantula creeps into Sexy Star’s bag.

Johnny Mundo def. Sexy Star – Cage Match

There were three cage matches in LU history as of this match, and Johnny was in all of them. Also, this is just a second match, and main event, which is very rare. To be honest, this was the weakest of all three, as Mundo did not get to pull off his best, rather chasing Sexy and dominating her with not-so-fancy moves. Star falls from the top of the cage for a near fall, only for two. Eventually Mundo pulls off her mask, throws it down and climbs down, mocking Sexy all the way. Such a cheeky cunt he is! 67/100

Mundo takes the steps while posing with his title, and then there’s Mack who stuns the champ. He gets some love from the fans and Sexy too…

Drago is on a short leash in the Snake Lair, and the queen asks if he’s her servant yet? NUNCA! Kobra laughs and says that her sneaky bois went on the hunt, and will let him have the bones. Drago says he would prefer to starve, and lets out a campy CGI fireball plunge.

Final Rating: 66/100 (C+) Middle of the road show for my liking, but the storyline of Mack’s rise is a thumbs up from me.

SEASON 3, EPISODE 17 (THE GAUNTLET)

Vamp in his best “holy shitballs he’s scary” makeup tells his son Puma to rise up and pledge his allegiance. Prince flips out, literally, lands on the knee and says “I do… master”. His mask is a bit darker nowadays, but he can still jump around like a pest.

Jeremiah Crane def. Mil Muertes

So Mil is schooling our resident edgy teen guy, and it’s all high velocity stuff. By the way, take a shot everytime Crane pulls a Bicycle kick. Joke, don’t, only Andre The Giant can handle such doses. It’s like X-Pac’s spinning wheel kick. The match is super short because Black Puma runs out and pokes Mil with a kendo stick, allowing Crane to get a sneaky cover and escape in one piece. 46/100

Puma continues his kendo stick carnage and takes a signature flip without putting a knee to the Aztec seal, instead bowing down to Vampiro.

Ricky Mandel meets Sexy backstage and says it’s awesome that she was the first woman to win the Lucha Underground title, and she shouldn’t feel bad for losing to Mundo, cause he’s the best. Sexy chooses not to argue, but Ricky says someone asked him to pass her a gift. Secret admirer? Mandel shares that he sends Johnny mail all the time, but he never answers, oh well. Mandel goes walking and Sexy opens the box to find another spider, this one is probably dead.

Sexano is working on the bench press when he’s greeted by Famous B. He tells the man he has all the tools, but he ain’t famous, and B can fix that. Texano is two seconds away from knocking the manager down, but B decides to flee, whispering “think about it”… Brenda also does, telling the stud to call her.

Jack Evans and PJ Black def. Son of Havoc and Angelico

It’s funny how Angelico and Jack wear the same neon green outfits, but are not the tag team partners like in AAA. They know each other well, and have a cool sequence at the start. PJ gets a lot of air time lately, good for him. The match is cut short though, as Angelico picks up yet another injury. Guy can’t catch a break… 62/100

Sexy barges into Dario’s office who’s eyeing up the big shining box. Star demands a match with Mariposa and gets it, not No Mas this time.

Texano def. Cage

Striker shouts out greatest sport comebacks, Liverpool v Milan final in particular, and for that I respect them even more. Very short match, this happened because Cage fell head first into an exposed turnbuckle. He bleeds too, which proves that he is a man, after all… 43/100

Dario won’t let us wait for match number 5, we will wrap it all up tonight, and it’s anything goes too!

Cage def. Texano

Cage is bleeding profusely, but his cylinders keep working. Texano claws, bites and swears a lot, he’s not a tecnico, neither is Cage. They brutalize each other with bumps on the bleachers and the floor, fighting among the fans. They appreciate this kind of roughness and we also get to see some unprotected chair shots and a Crossface… in the end though Cage takes Texano down with a Drill Claw for three. This war is over, and Cage just won the Unique Opportunity. 84/100

Dario says good job, now come to my office to get the prize, these troglodydes are to dumb to understand the holy awesomeness of this item. Cage follows and gets presented with a Gauntlet. He’s not impressed, and is flabbergasted that he put himself in such danger for a renaissance glove. Dario asks Cage to at least try it… Machine’s arm is electrified and he feels THE POWA! Picks Dario up by his neck and says he will keep it, thanks. The Gods from above start shuffling as Dario looks up.

Show Rating: 80/100 (B) Very good main event, but there were other “storyline” matches that could be better.

SEASON 3, EPISODE 18 (EVIL RISING)

Mil is butthurt that Puma is alive after he locked him in a coffin. Catrina says it was Vampiro who brought him back, he is used to toying with dark magic. Catrina herself teleports to the corridor where Jeremiah asks her if she saw him beat Muertes, the man she loves? Catrina smirks and says Mil is not the one she loves… Crane can’t believe it.

Sexy Star def. Mariposa

So Sexy just assumed that Mariposa was the one to leave the spiders in her locker, how rude of her. It was a regular match and it was okay, Mariposa looked good in particular, bashing Sexy across the table. No Kudo Driver, Sexy escaped, made her come back and pinned her arch rival after a Double Foot Stomp. Perhaps a tribute to Perro Aguayo Jr? 61/100

Sexy yells at Mariposa after the match, and goes away. Moth slides in to help her sister, but instead chokeslams her! Holy shit chants and a WTF from Striker.

Rabbit Tribe finds Mascarita… their guru, their God! They followed his lead and are now bowing to him. Sagrada nopes out and calls them crazy, to which Paul says “isn’t he incredible?”

Reptile Tribe def. Rabbit Tribe

Paul London bumps like a boss for Luchasaurus aka Vibora. Pindar is Steve Pain, if I am not mistaken, and he’s solid. Couple of comedy spots with Mala Suerte and Saltador, I like them a lot. The main highlight of the match is Drago working as a part of the heel faction and getting the fall after Kobra throws that order out. 59/100

Post match Fenix and Aerostar fight off the reptiles and lock arms with Drago who’s still in some sort of trance.

Sexy and Mack have that cool kindergarten handshake and the number one contender asks her to stay away, he got this. Sexy just shrugs… then Dario comes in calling this dude Mack Daddy and tells him that tonight he will not compete for the title, it will be just a warm up for their epic confrontation. Mack asks if Dario is a betting man? Occasionally… always bet on Mack.

Johnny Mundo def. The Mack

Good warm up for their eventual title match, no doubt about it. They had a good match, but it was harmed by a banal distraction from PJ and Evans, low blow and a roll up. 65/100

Mundo says “Mack, you suck, bro.” Calls him a fat piece of trash, choosing The All Night Long stipulation, almost to underline that he’s in far better shape than Mack daddy. Two assisted Curb Stomps and WU flee after seeing Mil and Catrina. They are not here for Mack or Mundo though, as Muertes unloads on Vampiro and throws him in the ring. Puma runs out to save his mentor, but Vamp tells him to keep away and gets laid out with a Flatliner.

Final Rating: 63/100 (C) A calm before the storm type of the show. Really looking forward to another All Night Long match, the first one was sooo good.

SEASON 3, EPISODE 19 (GODS AMONG MEN)

Dario is chilling with Delgado, discussing Cage and the Gauntlet that will soon consume the Machine. Cueto talks about their assistance to Gods, and then the talk about higher powers is interrupted by Dragon Azteca Jr. He wants Matanza in a Death Match! Delgado says the kid got balls, DAJ agrees. Dario picks up a phone and tells someone that they have a new main event for tonight.

Texano def. Joey Ryan

Ryan put his lollipop in the pants then took it out and licked near the end of the match. And people loved it… well I did not like this match until Famous B and Brenda showed up to entertain us a bit. They are wearing some strange cowboy-inspired outfits and talking nonsense. Famous B doesn’t let Joey get the bullrope while Brenda slides Texano a horseshoe. Knockout and we have a winner. Meh match… 51/100

Famous B tries to lift Texano’s arm, but the fucker is too strong. Brenda flirts and the winner goes up the stairs to B reminding him to call 423…

Mundo cuts a nice heel promo on people not believing him, while one guy yells “I ALWAYS BELIEVED IN YOU!” Funny. Johnny thanks PJ and Jack, tells Taya to keep working on his documentary. Also claims that Mack is not built to last… Mack runs in and slaps Johnny around, stuns Black and Evans, then about 7 security guards. Mundo left his title in the ring, so Mack poses with it. People do approve!

Cage def. Veneno

Dominant victory for Cage. He wore the gauntlet and got an easy win, announcers say that he’s extra aggressive. Veneno is Cortez under the spider mask… paranoid Sexy Star kicks the grounded man, telling him to stay away from her. 45/100

Puma hears Konnan in his head, that’s what people from the dark realm do apparently, if we can trust Catrina. Puma says he also hears the screams of agony from Mil, but Catrina is not bothered, saying Muertes will have Prince’s blood on his hands. Puma hits the punching bag with sticks so hard that it flings off into a wall.

Matanza def. El Dragon Azteca Jr – Death Match

This wasn’t very long, but perhaps it didn’t have to be. Dragon showed some epic moves, like hurricanrana to send Matanza stumbling down the steps or a cannonball senton from the elevated platform near the top. Matanza swatted that away and chokeslammed DAJ through the bleachers!! Immediate stoppage, we have a winner. 77/100

Rey comes back and stares into the whole where DAJ is now. Mysterio starts brawling with the monster and while he has trouble manhandling the bigger man, he successfully back body drops him through the roof. That is twice now for Matanza! People chant holy shit while Dario freaks out and kicks everyone out, the show is over.

We end this episode on Moth looking over Melissa from a distance as she’s leaving the arena. He is kidnapped by Mariposa though, and now he’s tied up in some dingy room. Mariposa says perhaps Marty has grown up, and he certainly has her attention now. Moth tries to free himself, but he’s stuck.

Final Rating: 74/100 (B-) Not bad at all, but the undercard wasn’t super good, plus the main event was kinda short. The stories keep getting better though, and I am eager to watch season 3 part two now. All Night Long will open it, and it’s going to be a banger!

SEASON 3, EPISODE 20 (ALL NIGHT LONG… AGAIN)

We kick the second part of season three with a super match.

Johnny Mundo def. The Mack – Lucha Underground title match

There’s a contender for the match of the season for you!

Go out of your way to catch this match, do yourself a favor. This was absolutely amazing from first bell to last, with plenty of comedy spots, high flying, no nonsense brawling, you name it! Beers reviving The Mack is great, even more amazing because Son of Havoc was the one who poured them on him, and he is straight edge. Johnny once again pressured the band to play only to get an epic crossbody from Sexy Star! Mack took too long to get up the ladder, fighting off Ricky Mandel, and roll over to pin Mundo, who survived by a thread. The greatest ruined orgasm ever, a draw. If Mack won right here, that would have been so beautiful, but no… mad respect to both guys for putting up a classic. Top 10 match in LU history, no doubt about it. 96/100

Dario says there’s no ties in his Temple, so next week it is a sudden death match. Mack stuns Mundo to end the show, he’s the number one babyface in the company right now.

Final Rating: 92/100 (A) I love this episode, Mack and Mundo put it all on the line. All Night Long might be the best performing match in LU anyway, even with Aztec Warfare and Grave Consequnces!

2 Liverpool – Atletico Madrid 3

Have nothing bad to say about the boys. Fought for all 120 minutes and yes, mistakes do happen in football. And as much as it is easy to blame Adrian for all the bad things that happened this night, let’s just appreciate the team and how much it improved over the years. If someone wants to be a toxic puss, there’s nothing we can do to stop them.

2005/06 Champions League season also ended in the 1/8, and we were in the final the next year.

Sometimes it’s not about winning only. For me it’s about getting invested in the match and getting behind the lads who work their socks off and play amazing football. And they did just that today, and for that I can’t blame them.

Yes, perhaps Adrian’s status in the team is in jeopardy now and he’s definetly not flawless. But attacking the man with vile threats and demands to throw him out of the team is so low. Loris Karius being a below average goalie did not validate all the shit he faced after his blunders, and it is also not ok to think that those attacks are justified because “we signed Alisson and won the cup”.

Basically you don’t have to be a piece of shit to tell a player he did not do well.

From the positives, Bobby finally scored at Anfield, and that was a moment of joy. Gini proved once again that he is an X factor in the big games, popping a header against another Spanish side. Ox shut his critics up with his best performance in the Liverpool shirt so far.

Robbo was very unlucky not to get at least one goal on his birthday. I’m also surprised that there was almost no bookings today… ref was ok in my opinion.

Hendo walked in and showed how much of a difference he can make. Man had an injury, and played for how many minutes? Exactly. Big props to him for stepping up once again.

Mo and Sadio had a little competition in the category the sexiest miss of the game. The bicycle kick (actually two of them) from Mane or that trademark Salah shuffle with a curling shot in the top corner, oh what could have been.

Virg was his usual brilliant self, but had to deal with a little Correa pest. Trent played hard and tried harder, as did Joe. Millie had a 5 minute run out to showcase what he’s all about, throwing himself on the ball like a madman. Takumi, Divock, Fab did not have much time, and there’s that.

We had to go all in and we lost in the casino. A couple of good hauls and KABOOM, you’re out of credits, mister Klopp. You win some you lose some. Who the fuck knows when the next UCL games will be played? As I look at it, let’s wrap up the league as fast as we can and look forward to the future, because it’s still good.

“We go again” is something this club is very familiar with, let’s show Everton who’s boss in a couple of days.

2 Liverpool – Bournemouth 1: Howe Cherries Pushed LFC One Step Closer To The Title

I’m not a woman, but I will enjoy these weekends a lot more now, following a scrappy 2-1 Liverpool win over Bournemouth.

It feels good to catch a game on Saturday, and get two more days off work, because lately watching our lads has been a little bit stressful. But it’s ok, we’re in the nervous part of the season. If you’re not nervous in March, then your team does something wrong.

Anyway, this wasn’t a great week news-wise.

On Friday Alisson got injured, and is now forced to miss a couple of games. People are spamming mad Hendo GIFs, but I think people are sleeping on Adrian here. He did well when called upon earlier this season, and maybe in some twisted way playing Adrian against Atletico is a blessing in disguise?

While he’s not better than Alisson, he’s an experienced spanish keeper, and a spectacular shot stopper. Perhaps he would have that little extra advantage knowing the language of the opposition, which could help him at defending set pieces? Then again, he made most of his mistakes defending those set pieces, and we have been bad in dead ball situations lately. I’m probably looking too much into it.

Also Robbo’s situation… He felt a little something, and was rested before the second leg. We need him for Atletico in his best conditions, no doubt about it, and Milner needed some game time to sharpen up before the end of the season. He’s on the yellow card in CL, and I’m almost confident he will be carded in the next game. Not that I would want that, of course. Another notable absentee is Naby Keita, who people either love or hate it seems, there’s no middle ground. Earlier this week his brother got in a car accident, so maybe that played some part in the squad selection? Once again, probably a precaution from Kloppo.

Among other things, Mo Salah was about to make his 100th PL appearance for LFC. He scored 69 goals and assisted 27 times in that timespan. As we later found out, his track record against “Cherries” is still superb.

The Actual Match Review

Well, we conceded again, now inside the first 10 minutes.

Gomez epizode from LiverpoolFC

Callum Wilson blatantly pushed Joe Gomez off and kept the attack going, putting one in the bottom corner after a low cross from Lerma. Those two fought and clawed a lot today, and props to them, but this should have triggered a VAR check. Klopp was mad, but called for the fans to get louder and overcome this situation together.

Then Ake won an aerial battle in the box, and Adrian had to show off his reflexes. When someone is threatening your goal while being marked by Virgil, you know something is wrong. That save kept us in the game though, and we played ourselves back in it.

We answered with a Firmino shot that didn’t equalize the score, but took captain Steve Cook off. That was a crucial moment in my eyes, as the young Simpson fella was robbed off the ball minutes later by Mane. At first I thought the moment was ruined after that pass, but Mo put the ball away with uncanny precision.

Not the strongest hit, but the accuracy makes it 1-1, and I’m actually reacting to this goal!

See, with Liverpool winning so much, my goal celebrations became more composed and calm, but this time I jumped off my chair. Thanks Mo, and congrats on your 70th goal!

Trent continued to dominate the right flank and getting in super advanced positions, and that was kinda logical, as Millie had to switch it to his right peg every play. Trent could have had another assist, but the young lad who gifted us a ball redeemed himself. Not for long though…

One sloppy pass is all it takes.

Soon it became 2-1! Key interception from Van Dijk, and a beautifully simple pass forward to Sadio, who’s free to run like a gazelle. He has the goal at his mercy, and he finishes it perfectly calm. Sometimes his shot selection can be wild, but this was a very composed final touch. And yes, at this point we actually looked like ourselves.

Milner shoved Fraser to the ground as a revenge for Gomez treatment, a little detail that made quite a difference in this match. If you haven’t seen James talking to the lads during the warm up, you’re missing out.

James Milner pre match speech. pic.twitter.com/mBbn9SBSsm
— – (@AnfieldRd96) March 7, 2020

A leader, a man of steel and great character. His best moment was waiting for us in the second half though! He also found himself unmarked, but his first touch shot went straight at Ramsdale.

First half ended, Sadio with a goal and an assist to his name. With Mo scoring an opener, I really wanted Bobby to put this to bed and give us some new memey celebration, but for some reason Bob can’t find the net at Anfield. Scenes when he pulls something outrageous against Atletico and shuts all his critics down.

The second half burned down more nerves for me, but there were some interesting moments that made me think about non-football stuff.

For example, Harry Wilson sitting in the LFC coat, and looking pretty smug about it.

I know he belongs to us, but I also can see how he deliberately did this to get some attention from the fans. Hopefully this doesn’t get him in hot water, he needs as much game time as possible. I would like to see him get a chance in our team, but who knows how it all ends.

Then something heroic and beautiful happened. The man, the myth, the legend James Milner sprinted to his goal to deny “Cherries”. This clearance reminded me of Jamie Carragher against Chelsea in a Champions League game more than 10 years ago.

Was this enough to warrant him a MOTM award?

Maybe, but between all of our guys I would name Sadio the best today, a goal and an assist is nothing to scoff at. There would be no arguments about it if his curling shot found the top bins near the end of the match.

That would be so satisfying, but the bar cockblocked the collective Kop orgasm.

I say, “save it for Atletico, Sadio.”

Solanke got some minutes, remember him?

He scored once for us, and it doesn’t look like he’s in high regard in Bournemouth either. Perhaps the Premier League is just too much for him, and he needs to try himself in some Championship side? I really don’t know how we got so much money for him. More questions than answers with this lad, but good luck to him.

2-1 is a slippery score, and we were almost punished for our sins near the end. Few seconds later Bobby had a clear cut chance to complete “The Holy Trinity” on the scoresheet, but the ball went over the bar. Who cursed you, my man?

Post Match Reactions, Don’t Gang Up On Fab

3 points is 3 points, we win again at Anfield, and hopefully get a little morale boost before the all-important fixture with Atletico.

We punished Bournemouth for two mistakes, we created more chances than usual, but we were not ideal. Expecting some outstanding display would be naive though, it’s all grind from here on.

Now there’s the ugly part of the discussion, people wanting Fabinho’s head on the stick for his latest performance. While he is far from form right now, we really don’t have a player with similar capabilities in our squad. When people called for his sub, I scratched my head, because we don’t have any other defensive midfielders.

Subbing him off for Lallana would be a risk, as Adam’s defensive efforts are best when they are far from our half of the pitch. Then again, people raged when he came in too, so you can’t please everyone. Some people want to see Naby, some criticize Ox for taking a shot, some just want to see Minamino on the pitch.

All I wanted is a third sub, but that never came. Jurgen is not a fan of all this substitution business, you know? But then again, he knows so much more than the out-of-the-mill fan, that I won’t even criticize it for him. Just wanted to hear a reason for it. Probably didn’t want to deal with the 4th referee?

Just joking, let’s celebrate. Atletico played 2-2 with Sevilla, ugh, guess I’ll watch highlights now.

3 Watford – Liverpool 0, OOF Size: Pretty Big

The streak is over, vibes are not the same

Oh, a match on a Saturday. What could go wrong?

It’s Nigel Pearson’s Watford away from home, so not a comfy affair after all. I remember one press-conference their gaffer had a couple of years ago, calling some journo an ostrich.

I definitely recommend that video for viewing, he’s a funny cunt. “I’m sorry son, but you’re daft.” Well, talking about daft and ostriches, I can remember another great video… He’s not a fucking ostrich, it’s an EMU!

Gotta love England.

Anyway, there was a match. A boring one, I must say, nothing interesting happened there. So boring that seeing Millie and Hendo sitting in the stands was a highlight. But I had plenty of things to think about before the match started. (Editor me – everyhting about the first half was written in half time)

Firstly, Joe Gomez misses out on his start, giving Deggsy Lovren a rare start. I would forget how he looked, if it wasn’t for a Chaokoh commercial, and he shaved too, that’s a makeover. Then there was this Twitter drama about Naby Keita. One camp calls him world class, other calls him a flop. I sit somewhere in the middle, and I definitely prefer Ox to Naby. More energy and strength, and he’s much more direct.

10 points for a week, nobody from the bench played either

Just before the match I checked my FPL team, and this is the absolute worst I’ve seen it to the day. And somehow I still managed to climb up, how in the blue hell? You can see that I don’t take this game too seriously anymore.

For a humble brag, I can say that i was a runner up in the Ukrainian league for the official EURO 2016 FPL game, and 1 person can back me up in this statement, if she didn’t forget about it.

I am spending too much time avoiding the match.

Well, the only good chance in the first half belonged to Deulofeu, who almost curled one in the top bins from the left flank. Later on this Barca lad will get injured and shave off 5 minutes from the clock. Seems like a bad injury, his season is probably over. Good luck to him in recovery, it sucks to see injuries like that one.

Dejan is so immobile that Fabinho has to drop deep to play it from the back… in matches like this you beging to rate Hendo and Gomez more. Gini saves Lovren from Internet wrath, but he also has to be bailed by Big Virg. He’s good, and he smells nice, according to Troy Deeney, but his frown is not something you want to see very often.

Bobby and Mo slip on the same spot, something is up tonight. The only half chance of the half is from Salah, he hits the side netting after a soft delivery by ox. I felt that he wanted to blast it like Stevie, but too many bodies were in Watford’s half. The match turns a bit ugly after Deulofeu’s injury, Deenye and Hughes stiffly meet our guys. 5-1 for shots in Watford’s favor, and we almost conceded before half time.

It’s funny to write about the second half already knowing the end result, but here it goes. Sarr pops one on ne, can’t score. Give this boy more chances, he will get his due soon enough.

Second half starts with Robbo on the right and Trent on the left, interesting. Amazing pass by Virg almost gives us a rare Robbo goal, but the shot is not good enough.

BAM! Watford scores. Lovren stuck with Deeney, ball bounced a bit and found Sarr who hit it from a couple of yards. Pitchforks for Dejan are out by this moment, I feel like. At this moment I think, ok, now we start playing. It was like this with Norwich and West Ham, and this seemed similar.

Nope.

That cheeky ginger cunt Will Hughes saved the ball from crossing the line, deeney punted it forward and Sarr wa quicker than wind, chipping Alisson for his brace.

If I’m not mistaken, he and Sadio are bros, so he’s not the worst candidate to humble us down a little. Actually, Sadio once asked Deeney to take care of Sarr, I guess Deeney did just that?

Not a set piece play, but almost felt like a dead ball situation. Kloppo decides to throw Lallana in for Wijnaldum, and it kinda makes sense, we needed something new down the middle. And he actually gave us our only good moment out of thin air, volleying a shot into the bar. Not long after Divock enters the pitch for Ox, but his magic is not working today.

Trent tried to give us hope with a cheeky free kick, but was too smart for his own good. Later on he will set up a third goal for Watford. Jeez, you know it’s a bad match when Deeney embarrsasses you, and flashes his beautiful smile. Assisted by Sarr, who is later subbed off for a guy named Pussetto. I know it’s intentional, Pearson, you knew what you were doing lol.

We tried to create something, but the quality wasn’t there. By the way, Minamino had a run about, would like to see more of him soon, maybe he’s the player that could help us out creatively. This match showed why we can’t rely on trent and Robbo all the time, they had bad games tonight.

Van Dijk hits a long shot in frustration, the plot armor is off, and the Wenger army celebrates. Arsenal fans have something to smile about, which is good after their result against Olympiakos. We’re no longer invincible.

44-1.

Man, I remember my reaction to that match, I watched it live.

While Watford is no Brock Lesnar, they F5ed us into the ground tonight. Maybe it’s for the better that we got slapped like that, maybe this will make the team angrier. Also it could help us in the Champions League, as we would no longer look for all those fancy little records.

Not sure if it’s a biggie, but it feels better now we have such a big lead over our competition. Need to figure this football thing out quickly, to face Atletico in a better shape. I wouldn’t mind using that Hendo gif, but I guess it’s too early and unwarranted.

Poor Kloppo.

Felt bad for him, but it had to happen eventually. Anti-LFC fans will have something to warm their soul, we will have plenty of things to think about. Next bout against Chelsea in the FA cup, they’ve drawn with Bournemout earlier today. Maybe now we can go for that pot? I certainly would put some effort in getting it.

Unexpected, but also inevitable, given how we have performed lately. YNWA!

0 West Ham vs. Liverpool 2

There’s no easy matches in the Premier League, they say. This one begs to differ.

The biggest chance created by the Hammers happened in the first half through Lanzini. I remember some people said he would be a good replacement for Coutinho. I’m glad we spent that money on Virgil and Alisson instead, not looking for a straight swap.

They had a solid game, not having to play to 100% of their ability.

Well, Ali made a great save late in the game, but apart from that, both guys didn’t have much work. Maybe there was something in the start of second half and I missed it, my stream died.

About that, I watched it on some Belarussian channel. It’s so weird when you understand every single word of a language you don’t know. My fav word is “shmaht” now. That commentator also went on Liverpool fans denying that their team has already won the league, and that we’re “wearing masks” by pretending we didn’t win anything yet.

Motherfucker, if you would experience a handful of lost finals and multiple close finishes in the league, you would keep your dumbass head shut in the middle, smh.

Back to the game, Mo stepped up a bit with Sadio away from the team. The legendary injury that cost millions of FPL players their triple captain chip. Hey, I’m one of them!

Anyway, he converted a pen that Divock earned, and did it confidently. Not Milner level of confidence, and a whole lot of run up, but it’s a clear goal. Also, how good was Bobby to keep the ball in play to actually rescue this chance.

LiVeRpOoL aNd PeNalTiEs, eh?

We also bought the goal posts to deflect the shots of opposing team. Trent knocking the ball in the post and pretending nothing happened is somehow cool.

Around 1:00

Some little guy named Mo hit it too, don’t you forget. But that was late in the game, when the deal was mostly sealed.

Missed the second goal live, it was a great counter. That sexy and filthy pass from Mo is smth to put on a loop, good finish by Ox too. I knew him hitting a bench last time around wasn’t a big deal, he is just a competitive lad and wants to play more.

And being from the future, I already know that he will get his returns in buckets.

I don’t like mid week matches, but how can you not like matches where your favorite team wins? Up the reds!

Pidgeot, I Choose You (2 Shrewsbury – Liverpool 2 Reaction)

Posting this seconds before the West Ham match… You know, I love Pokemon.

Bout against Shrewsbury started well, Jones scored again and Adrian made a couple of big saves. I almost collapsed from exhaustion near half time, but got myself some coke (the drink) and banana for second half, plus some music to survive this viewing. Not that it was bad, but I barely could stay awake for it. It becomes pretty regular, I don’t know why it’s so tough…

Second half starts with the funniest own goal I’ve seen in years, by ex-United player Donald freaking Love. With a name like that you have to be featured in Vice City. Anyway, I though that was it.

Yowie wowie

Nope, not really. Fabinho, Matip and Lovren all looked like hibernated animals out there tonight. Sloppy as fuck. No match fitness whatsoever…

Neco Williams and Larouci are not solid wingbacks defensively from what I’ve seen. The latter one fouled for penalty, which was converted by Pidgeot-lookalike Cummings fella.

And oh boy, he scored again after a yet another blunder by Captain Lovren.

I had no reaction for that goal, but some of the home fan reactions felt so fake, forced and corny. Maybe that’s how it all looks w/o commentary? Anyway, Kloppo smirked and threw Ox, Salah and Bobby in. Too late, unfortuanetly.

Disappointing performance from Minamino and Elliott. Origi wasn’t much better either, but how can you look good when the team can’t string three passes together?

Chirivella had a great assist, and he’s a clear deep lying playmaker, but I doubt he would ever make it in the Premier League. Remind me in 5 years?

In games like this Gini and Keita could be masive. Heroic draw from Shrewsbury, and a pitch invasion after the match. Bunch of snotty kids started nagging Lovren, deservedly so.

Man of the match is probably Adrian, but if we take two sides into account, it’s that blonde pidgey bastard. They’ll secure the bag at Anfield, and I hope next time we would fare better.

Also we were lucky not to concede another penalty, VAR would probably knock us out. Fabinho had that “oh shit” look on his fave when the ball hit the arm.

As good as Liverpool is right now, this was not a good performance. We threw away a 2-0 lead. It is the first LFC game I reviewed for this blog , wish it could have gone better.

Replay it is then, let’s make sure we go through.

UPD: Kloppo said nah, we will play kids LOL. Winner of that tie goes to face Chelsea, let’s see how it all works out.